Understanding Me
by Athese
Summary: Everybody makes mistakes, and they are made to be forgiven eventually. But some are just too big to be forgiven, and they will haunt you forever. Unfortunately Mikey knows this a little too well, and even when he switches schools he is still haunted by that one mistake he made so long ago. Human-Au.
1. Chapter 1

**So, as you probably know, this is my first Human Au and I'm very excited actually, but also pretty nervous about this one, I've never done this. I actually always wanted to do one, but never started to write it, but then InsaneDutchGirl came with this amazing Human AU story, so I decided to make one too. **

**Hope you enjoy x**

**"Should I lock the last open door, my ghost are gaining on me."**

**TMNT**

I sat here, my backpack loosely on my back, watching the park in front of me. My fingers were gripping the soft leather resting on top of my shoulder. My heart viciously beating against my chest as I prepared myself for the moment that was about to come. I was nervous, scared. There was no denying I was. Would they recognize me?

That very question went through my head the whole time I was here, and the whole week already. Would they know who I really was, or would they believe the lie I was forced to live in? I didn't know, and to be honest, I didn't want them to know, they could never know about it. But somehow I knew they would anyways.

The soft wind was around me, taking my hair in every direction and I closed my blue eyes for a second. I didn't want to leave, I was scared, I really was. Scared to be recognized, or worse; that they would recognize me. And again my heart started pounding in my chest, until it was getting too be painful.

I knew I was being foolish. Of course they would recognize me. Of course they would tell each other so they could get me. Even when I wasn't on their school anymore, they would still go after me. I would pay for the mistakes I had made. My breathing began to increase rapidly, images swimming through my head again.

I moaned slightly and placed my hands on both sides of my temple, gritting my teeth. It wasn't real, this wasn't real. The laugh of the little girl, the sweet and beautiful girl I used to play with just a few years ago, and now all that was left of her were the terrified screams, the scars littering her body.

My breath hitched in my chest and my hand immediately flew to my chest, squeezing it and trying to get my breathing under control. The screams, the terrible screams that would leave her throat were ringing through my head, attacking me and pounding on my chest until it was too painful to breathe.

A warmth flushed over me as another scream tore out of her mouth. I couldn't stop, it was all my fault. And because of that, she had to suffer, and even at this moment. I buried my face in my own hands, trying to stop the tears from flowing. I couldn't show up with red eyes, not again but somehow my body wouldn't listen to me.

The tears started falling before I could even stop them, staining my cheeks with my own tears. I was tired, just so tired but they kept streaming down my face. My face was still throbbing, my cheek aching and a bruise already forming where the fist had hit me. I didn't even cry back then, so why did I have to cry now?

Again I gritted my teeth, angrily wiping them away. I couldn't cry. No, I could cry and I had done that a lot already but I wasn't allowed to cry. Nobody said I wasn't allowed to do it, it was me who did. I didn't allow myself to cry. I didn't deserve to cry, not when all of this was my fault, I could've stopped with the lie, but I didn't.

And yet I was, crying on the bench in the park. I was supposed to be in school already but I couldn't force myself to leave the safety. I enjoyed the nature around me, it was calming and gave me time to think. And sometimes that was just what I needed, and sometimes it wasn't. It would often bring back memories.

Things I wanted to forget so badly. And even though I hated them I couldn't get myself to leave this place. The aching died down slightly, like it always did and I slowly opened my eyes. They were blurred by the tears brimming in my eyes and I quickly wiped them away with the back of my hand, sniffling slightly.

I silently cursed myself and rubbed my eyes slightly, trying to get rid of the red eyes I was sure I was having right now. I took a deep breath and looked around, trying to see if someone had seen me, but luckily the park was nearly abandoned in the morning, only a few people walking by.

Of course the park was abandoned right now, nobody dared to take a step inside of the park because of everything that had happened, but I wasn't scared for something that couldn't hurt me even more, it wasn't possible. And it hurt to think about it really, it was my fault after all the park was practically empty at this time.

Nobody dared to step into the park when it was still dark, nobody wanted to enter the park when there was no way to see each other, and now, when it was slowly starting to get lighter again, people were entering the park, but there were still a bit hesitant, and it mostly took a few more hours before the park was normally filled again.

That was exactly the reason I was here right now. Nobody would go looking for me here, nobody would even think about it. They thought I would never come to this park again, at least not during the day. And nobody had the guts to visit me during the night when I was indeed in the park. So I just sat here most of the time, thinking about all the stuff that was happening around me.

Again the beautiful face of the little girl came into my mind. She was only 9 years old. 7 years old when it happened, when her life was completely shattered by the perfectly innocent bullet from the gun. Everybody makes mistakes, and they are made to be forgiven eventually. But some are just too big to be forgiven, and they will haunt you forever.

From all those faces, I only remembered her. The smile she wore, the tears on the first day, and the tears I had worn that day. I didn't understand it at that time, not fully at least. I was only 13 at that time but I knew it wasn't right what I was doing. I wanted to stop, but the fear took the better half of me, rejecting the idea.

That was something I could never forgive myself, every time I see her I am reminded, and every time the terrible aching in my chest starts again, cutting off the air and denying any oxygen from going through my lungs. It would always end, like everything did, but it would always take time for it to leave.

I should be at school already, my first lesson had started already. My teachers knew about it, not everything but they knew about everything that was known to the rest of the world, and they had assured me it wasn't a problem I would be late, or would skip lessons if I'd tell them first, but I wasn't planning on doing so.

How much I just wanted to run away from everything, I knew I couldn't. I had to face it someday, I had to attend school in the end, no matter what everyone had said. I had to face them eventually. I was just so grateful I got rid of the rest a few days ago, but they would always haunt me, that was sure, they weren't about to let me go.

My movements were sloppy from sitting for such a long time. My arms stretched and popped slightly at the strain but I ignored it and got to my feet. The school wasn't far from the park I was at, hardly a street. It was in fact used a lot. Most students used it to get home, and take a short-cut through the park.

My heart pounded with every step I took. I knew the school already so I wasn't worrying about finding everything, I was just worried about the amount of information they had, and the rest of the students. Maybe they already knew it was me, and they already figured out who I was.

Everybody in the country knew me after all, but almost none would recognize me in real-life, but once they knew there was no going back. And that was something I was worried about the most. I just hoped that these students would be a little bit better, but somehow I knew that was something I shouldn't hope for. My breath hitched as I stopped in front of the school, my heart pounding painfully once again.

'Don't stop now Mikey' I whispered to myself, encouraging myself to take the last step. The air in the school wasn't as dense as in my previous school but it was suffocating at the same time. I could hear the people all around me, talking and laughing. And none of them knew who was entering their school right now.

My fingers clamped around the soft leather around my shoulder as I made my way through the hall and up the stairs, silently walking over to the right classroom. My fingers reached for the door, I wasn't that late, just 10 minutes so I was sure they wouldn't send me away, but that wasn't the thing I was afraid of, it were the people inside.

**TMNT**

**So what do you all think? Should I continue with it or just stick with the regular turtles? ^^ **


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter is… sooo late. And I'm sorry. School is just too much right now. I still have to end in 2 huge reports, and it counts for my final exams so I can't afford getting an insufficient and it's so much work… **

**That's why I haven't been uploading much, and on top of that this chapter just wouldn't work.. And I'm still not satisfied, but after having re-written it three times.. I figured I could just post it instead. **

**TMNT**

It was just a normal morning, nothing special about it. Leo and Raph were both in the same English class. Leo on the left side of the class and Raph on the right side. Even if they were close, twins even, they both had their own friends to sit with. There were classes they sat together, but mostly they didn't. Raph was laying on top of his arms, softly dozing off.

They were reading, nothing special and Raphael mostly thought it was boring, especially since the person he sat next to had been diagnosed with pneumonia, so he wouldn't be coming to school any time soon. Which also meant Raph was sitting alone for the next couple of weeks until his friend was cured, and had no one to talk to in the meantime.

Leo was, as always, annoyed with the people behind him. The school wasn't very big but it wasn't very small either, and even though most of the students were very nice, and weren't judging on each other, not even the close relation the brothers had, there was still a small part that was ruining it. They kinda were a problem group in New York.

It was a group of 20 young-adults and teenagers who called themselves the purple dragons, they were all in school and most were in the same year as Donnie, Leo and Raph but they were so different from the other students. They were the ones to bully younger children and to steal from them, but they always seemed to avoid the police.

They once vandalized their old school 2 years ago so they were forced to move schools, half of them to one school on one side of the city, and the other half to this school, and though they weren't as bad as they used to be, being separated from the rest of the group, they were still causing trouble, even with the ten of them.

And Leo was fortunate enough to sit right in front of them. The purple dragons never focused in the lessons, only hitting on female teachers, young ones especially. And causing trouble with the old ones, throwing things and disturbing the lessons. Honestly every teacher was done with them, but for some reason they all seemed to get away with it, or with a minor punishment.

No matter how severe the 'crime' was, the headmaster always punished them lightly, or not at all. Mostly they could get away with detention, or something like that. Leo sighed and focused on his book again, this promised to be a boring lesson, really not knowing how wrong he could be.

TMNT

It wasn't hard to notice the little guy. He was wearing a large black with orange sweater, obviously not wanting to get recognized and was sitting at the back of the class. He was gazing down all the time and the large purple bruise on his cheek was clearly showing on his pale face, even though he was desperately trying to cover it up.

He had freckles under his baby blue eyes, who were sparkling with joy and yet fear, and he had messy blond hair, with slight spikes in it, but they were barely noticeable. He seemed very young but he had introduced himself clearly. His name was Mikey and he was 15 years old, almost 16. The same age as Donnie, while Leo and Raph had already turned 16 this summer.

The freckles and the blue eyes gave him a very childish nature, but the look in his eyes told a completely different story. He was very nervous in front of the class and wanted nothing more than to sit down right away while he was talking, glancing down the whole down, and pulling his hoodie over his head to cover his face.

He was sitting alone in the back of the class, avoiding everyone and pretending he wasn't there, but of course he was. The moment he had entered the classroom the purple dragons had started to tease him, calling him names and tripping him, obviously in a way the teacher wouldn't notice. And Mikey did nothing to stop them, practically accepting his fate.

Most people said it was because of their group. Apart from the police, nobody dared to argue with the group, fearing for their own lives, fear of being terrorized. While in fact the purple dragons was supposed to be a group to fight criminals, but fame and money turned them around eventually. And so they continued to tease Mikey.

He had already been late for his first class, but his teacher let him in because he was new on this school, at least that's what everyone thought. Nobody in the class had missed the simple nod the teacher in front of the classroom had given him, and the look of pity on her face, sadness in her eyes. And even when he was sitting down, the purple dragons would throw things at him, calling him stupid for no reason, but none of his classmates dared to stood up for him, and most didn't even notice.

"Sid, don't you think you're being a big harsh on him?" Leo hissed, turning back to face the leader of the little group. He had always the purple dragons, he hated what they did. They were misusing the power they had received over the years, the trust they had earned for doing good things, trust that had been shattered so long ago.

Sid turned around, cocking his eyebrow and looking Leo right in the eyes, narrowing them dangerously but Leo didn't back down from him, he wasn't afraid of him, for any of them but he wasn't looking for a fight either. He could beat one, but not all of them. And he didn't want to cause his family any trouble. And it obviously didn't help that they were already resented by the group.

Sid was almost a bit like Raph. He had black spiked hair with a lot of gel. He wore a leather black jacket and he had a piercing through his eyebrow and a toothpick in his mouth. There was a gap in his mouth where his tooth had been knocked out by a football game one time. And unlike Raph, he was definitely misusing his power.

He wasn't the real leader of the purple dragons, the worst part of the group was sent to the other school, a larger school with more rules, along with the real leader of the whole gang, Fong. And Sid became the leader of the other small group to control it, but Fong always stayed the overall leader. When they were united again on the streets, anywhere outside of school.

"Shut up _Leonardo_, you have no idea what you're talking about" Sid snapped, snickering as Luke, another purple dragon, hit Mikey with a piece of paper. "That kid has to know his place so don't interfere" He said before turning back to the boy in the back of the class, snickering as Mikey just slipped underneath his table more and more.

Leo glared for a few seconds and then turned around slowly, focusing on his book again. There was nothing he could do for now, it was no use arguing with those guys. He quickly caught the gaze of his younger twin who was sitting on the other side of the class. A look of disproval on his face. He may be the 'tough' guy around the school but he never supported bullying.

They had both experienced it when they were younger because of their 'appearance', and unfortunately Donnie became the target of the bullies, for being different than his two older brothers, and because he still couldn't properly defend himself at that time. And those cowards had used that to their advantage, but they eventually regretted it and they never even dared to look at Donnie.

Of course Raph would tease occasionally, the ones they could both laugh about but he never bullied someone, unlike the purple dragons. Leo nodded slightly to him, signaling he was thinking the same thing. It was ridiculous how they were treating him, he was just hoping it was a one-time thing. And they were just messing with him because he was new on the school

But they were clearly overreacting. And how much Leo wanted to block out the small laughs behind him he couldn't. And he couldn't help but to feel that perhaps the purple dragons knew more than he did. There was something in their eyes, it wasn't just teasing, there was something else. And the fact that this Mikey did nothing to protect himself….. something just wasn't right.

When the bell rang Mikey was the first one to leave the class. His backpack wasn't fully on his back yet but practically sprinting out of the class. And in a split second Leo could clearly see tears in the boy's eyes, and Mikey biting his lip to prevent them from falling. The teacher let out a small sigh, thinking nobody would see it, but Leo did.

There was a look of disproval on her face, and it was obvious she had seen what happened to the new boy, or at least a part of the whole act. And yet she didn't do anything to stop it, but that wasn't like her. She was mostly sweet, and caring for other students, and while she never dared to argue with the purple dragons, she never let the teasing go unnoticed, unlike now.

Leo could see Raph approaching him from the corner of his eye, ready to go to the cafeteria but Leo turned around, facing the purple dragons again, who were now laughing out loud, and talking to each other in excitement. Not caring about the stares they were getting because of the teasing, at least the ones who noticed.

Right in front of Mikey's seat was another boy, also a purple dragon named Tao. And while the rest of the group was laughing, he was gazing at the spot where Mikey had been just seconds ago. His eyes narrowed, sparkling with unknown emotions, hurt, hatred. But most importantly, there was absolutely no joy in his eyes.

It was a twin just like Leo and Raph. He was the youngest of the two, and his older brother was none other than Fong. The leader of the whole gang. Once the group got separated it was obvious Tao would take the responsibility and become the leader, but that didn't happen, instead Sid got the role as leader and nobody understood why.

They never saw the boy again that day, and when he had asked by the receptionist, she had told him he had gone home feeling sick. But Leo had seen the boy, he seemed just fine, nervous but obviously not sick. And even she was acting different and that's when Leo knew there was definitely something that he didn't know, and the rest did.


	3. Chapter 3

**I honestly have no idea how the classes in America are like, so please bear with me xD**

TMNT

"I'm telling you Donnie, there was something off about that guy" Leo exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air to emphasize the point, throwing his jacket almost on the ground as he did so. Even though it was September is was still very warm, too warm to wear a coat actually. Leo wore a short-sleeved shirt and his jacket over his shoulder.

Donnie wore a thin jacket so he wasn't really bothered by the heat around him. His light brown hair, which had always been little bit longer than 'normal' haircuts was now being taken away by the soft wind. The red haired teenager was also wearing a short-sleeved t-shirt, his football jacket flung over his shoulder.

The spikes that were usually upright were now flat on top of his scalp, though he managed to get it standing a little bit, it was still wet from the shower he just had before leaving school. He was usually long home by now but due to an important football game coming up they scheduled extra trainings, not like Raph was complaining, he loved working out with his team.

"I know Leo, you've been telling me the whole way home" Donnie sighed and send a glare towards his older red-headed brother as he chuckled at the display, and he immediately shut his mouth, Donnie didn't often get angry, though when he got angry no one even dared to argue with him, and it wasn't a secret Donnie got irritated easily.

It was a part of their history they didn't want to talk about it, and not many people knew about it. Only his two older brothers, his father and his personal doctor. Donnie was difficult, not his personality but the things he had gone through at a very young age. He needed medication, therapy sessions and a lot of care at home.

And yet Splinter never regretted adopting his youngest son, and neither did the twins. Their house in Japan had always been small and Leo and Raph were forced to share a room because of Donnie's arrival, something the younger sibling had been feeling guilty over for a long time, but none complained about it.

Luckily when they moved to America they got a bigger house. Their dad owned a dojo in Japan, it was a very famous one so people from everywhere came towards it to train, or visit during holidays. That being one of the reasons Hamato Yoshi had taught his sons to speak English like a native speaker. And they would mostly speak English at home, only occasionally speaking Japanese.

Hamato Yoshi owned a successful dojo, and even people in America had noticed the popularity in Japan. Eventually some business guy had offered him an own dojo in America. With a higher salary, better working hours and better education for his sons. They were a bit hesitant at first. Going to a new country and leaving all your friends behind.

But they also knew it was a great opportunity. Dad could get a better job and they would be moving to New York city! The house wasn't too fancy but it was so much bigger compared to their old house in Japan. They had talked about it for a long time and eventually after discussing everything, they had all agreed to it eventually.

And that was maybe the one of the best things they had done so far. The medical knowledge was way more advanced in America and Donnie could get proper and more local treatment to help him. And it did help him very much, but some things were just too big to be forgotten and he would always be stuck with the experience.

Splinter's mediation lessons helped him a lot with his emotional issues. He got irritated a lot, and very fast too at first. At first he would feel very alone, thinking he didn't belong figuring he was adopted but his brothers helped him with that, stating that it didn't matter if they shared the same blood, they were brothers no matter what, nowadays he felt like he belonged and he got less irritated.

"I'm agreeing with Fearless on this one Don, that kid acted weird" Raph eventually cut in, helping his older twin out. Don whipped his head around, staring at the red-haired teen walking next to him, almost not believing what he was hearing. Raph never sided with Leo, almost at least. While they were twins, and shared the same DNA, they were completely different.

Leo was very calm and almost never got angry while Raph really honored his hair, he was a literal red-head. He got angry very easily and just couldn't make any compromises. Though their father had explained it was Raph's way with dealing stuff. He didn't know how to handle all the emotions, and he didn't want to appear weak or anything.

And despite the anger, and being completely opposite to Leo, they all knew Raph was a complete softy. Despite his attitude at school, and his popularity status, he never picked on smaller children. He never bullied them or anything, unlike the purple dragons that is. Donnie sighed and turned to Leo once again, waiting for him to continue his story.

"Look Don, when he came in he was really nervous and it was like he didn't want to be recognized. He had a hoodie on top of his head and all. And the purple dragons were picking on him, like bullying him, and he did nothing to defend himself." Leo said, summarizing what happened in their last class, before Mikey went home at least.

"That does sound a little strange Leo but to be honest.. there are a lot of kids that get picked on, or that are nervous at the first day. What's so different about this Mikey?" Donnie softly questioned. The purple dragons picked and bullied a lot of people at their school, so it was weird that Leo seemed to be so focused on this particular kid, Raph even agreeing with him.

"Ya didn't see him Don… he was wearing long-sleeves in class despite the temperature and he didn't seem happy, not only the bullying but he just seemed so … alone" Donnie immediately stopped as the words left Raph's mouth. A frown appeared on his forehead and he sat down on a bench next to the path.

"What are you suggesting?" Donnie's voice was cold but there was also an ounce of defeat and he dropped his head. Leo and Raph quickly exchanged a look and walked over to their younger brother, sitting on both sides and putting a hand on either shoulder. Raph looked over to his youngest brother with sadness, he hadn't meant to upset his brother.

Donnie took a few deep breaths and looked over to both of them. The same fearful expression once again lingered in his eyes. The same he would always get when he had another panic attack once in a few weeks, and the same look when he was confronted with too much blood, or someone reminded him of _that_ moment.

"Did he really look like me?" Donnie whispered, the coldness long gone, but so was the fearful expression. What was left was the small hint of sadness in his eyes, thinking that some else had to go through the same thing as he. It was no secret to his brothers of his condition, and they had both seen Donnie on his worst days.

When he would be trashing and screaming because of a nightmare back in Japan. And once he would wake up his eyes would be filled with so much dread and fear. The usual calm auburn eyes wide and twinkling with absolute horror. But that was only during his attacks, or when he remembered some things, and thinking that Mikey had those eyes during class…

Leo took a deep breath himself and looked over to Donnie. "Worse Don, way worse"

TMNT

The next morning Raph was, surprisingly, on time in the classroom. It was math so that usually meant talking instead of working, problem was the person he sat next to was still ill so it promised to be boring lesson once again. Donnie and Leo were both in another Math class so they weren't an option either. One advantage was that none of the purple dragons were in this class ether.

He sighed and placed his head onto his hand, supporting himself and stared to the front of the class. He was in the back of the class but he was surrounded by all those girly-girls. No fun to talk with either. Just before the bell ran, indicating the start of the lesson, a small figure made its way into the classroom, Raph's eyes widened for a second when he noticed the boy.

It was the same 15 years old boy he and Leo had seen yesterday, Mikey. He was wearing the same hoodie he wore yesterday and just like the last day he had it pulled over his head. He looked around the class skeptically and walked to the back of the class, to the empty seat on the other side of the class, the other side of Raph.

The red-haired teen frowned slightly, glancing from his empty seat to the lonely teen that was now staring out of the window. Raph glanced to the front but to his delight saw that the teacher was still busy. He picked up his book and backpack and walked over to the empty seat next to the new kid, sitting down next to him.

"Hey" Raph said, keeping his voice low so the teacher wouldn't notice. The boy looked frightened for a second and his breath hitched in his throat before the muscles of the kid relaxed again, shuffling slightly in his chair and glancing around nervously. "I'm Raph by the way, we're in the same English class" He said, trying to start a conversation with the teen.

The small teen seemed hesitant at first, a small sign of fear twinkling in his eyes, the same baby blue eyes that were scanning Raph throughout. Mikey was trying to cover it up though Raph saw past his futile attempts but made no remark about it. After a few seconds the small teen took a soft breath and spoke in a soft voice.

"I'm Mikey, but you probably already knew that" Mikey said, still a bit doubtful but a small grin appeared on his face. "You're that Hamato kid right, from Japan?" Mikey added unsure after a few seconds. Raph rolled his eyes slightly, he had heard that question many times in the few months they had been here in America, they were known for their name.

'The Hamatos', those Japanese kids that just moved from Japan to America. Most people that didn't know them described them that way, or whenever someone had to explain who they were talking about. Raph and his brothers had heard it so many times, but for some reason it startled him when Mikey asked him.

"Yea we are, but please just call me Raphael, or Raph" While he had no shame in carrying his, Japanese, surname he had been called 'Hamato' way too many times. Not even because of their Japanese status but because some people had no idea that the surname and their first name was switched in Japanese, a common mistake that they were all familiar with.

Raph never blamed those people, and neither did his brothers. People that weren't familiar with the name switch in Japan just couldn't know about it. It was so common in America, and other countries to say your first name first, and then your family name. And while they never blamed them, it was getting a little bit irritating at some times.

"I know, just to be sure" Mikey shrugged before scanning Raph slightly again. "Aaannd you have a younger or older twin?" He grinned softly. Raph couldn't help but to contain a snicker. For some reason this didn't seem like Mikey at all, this wasn't the scared kid he knew and saw just minutes ago. He seemed more relaxed and was starting to laugh some more.

"An older one, Leo, but I'm the better one" He snickered, mentally praying Leo was here right now. "And we have a younger brother too, don't forget Donnie" He added. Lowering his voice again as he noticed the teacher staring at him. Mikey's mouth opened in a silent 'o' but then turned into frown before turning towards his neighbor again.

"Wait is he that guy who walked with you in the park yesterday?" Mikey suddenly blurted out, not really noticing what he was seeing. "Sorry" Mikey peeped as the teacher gave him a stern glare and he slipped a little bit on his seat. Raph and a few others snickered at the display and immediately the same doubt rolled over Mikey's eyes again.

Mikey suddenly seemed to shrink inside of his sweater, sliding deeper under his desk and unconsciously, or consciously tugging his hoodie slightly, trying to cover his face. A slight tremor made its way up his back while he tried desperately to hide it. Raph noticed the distress and seemed confused for a second as he looked to the people staring at him.

"Yea that's him. He's 3 months younger than we are, he was adopted when we were like 6 months" Raph said swiftly as he noticed Mikey's distress from all the attention. It was louder than tolerated, earning him a glare from the teacher too. The students' attention shifted to Raph and simply shrugged his shoulders, as long as he wasn't send out of class he had nothing to worry about.

The class snickered slightly at Raph's display and the teacher let out a long and annoyed sigh before turning back to her work again, leaving Raph and Mikey alone again. Raph was silent for a moment, the image seconds ago replaying in his head before he remember what Mikey said about his younger brother and looked over to Mikey.

"Wait.. what'ya mean in the park?!" Raph suddenly hissed, sounding harsher than he truly intended and Mikey squirmed slightly. "I thought you went home feeling sick" he added, his voice calmer than before but still slightly skeptical. The fact that Mikey had seen them yesterday and they hadn't seen the young teen was one thing.

But the fact that he went home after first period, feeling 'sick', and then show up in the park just hours later was another thing. Mikey was nervously playing with his fingers, twirling them slightly to distract himself, and Raph, from the question, but the red-haired teen kept his eyes on the smaller teenager next to him.

"I come to the park all the time dude, can't help it you guys showed up" Mikey said, shrugging slightly but completely ignoring the fact that he had showed up, in the park, while he was supposedly sick. Raph raised his eyebrow, hoping to get something more out of the freckled turtle but without any success, Mikey kept his mouth sealed.

"That's odd 'cause someone told us you went home sick after second period, so why were you still in the park?" he watched with regret as Mikey cringed slightly again but he couldn't help it. Like Leo had said yesterday, there was something off about this kid, and seeing the same symptoms Donnie always displayed years back wasn't helping either.

Mikey kept completely silent this time, and the staring at him didn't work this time either. The grinning teenager was gone again, being replaced by this zoned-out Mikey he remembered from yesterday, minus the constant bullying the purple dragons were throwing at him. He was staring down, his head slightly turned away from Raph.

"Is it what the purple dragons did yesterday, 'cause Mikey if that's it…." Raph started, trying somehow to get Mikey to talk again. Things just didn't add up here. The way his mood suddenly changes, the way he ran off yesterday, the defeated manner he gave when the purple dragons all started to pick on him, but before he could even finish his sentence he saw something dwell up in the corner of Mikey's eye.

"Can we just… drop it please?" his voice sounded vulnerable and he quickly wiped away the single tears in his eyes, looking away in shame. Raph swallowed down a lump. It reminded him so much of Donnie in a way. The defeated sound in his voice, the shame for showing weakness and yet they were so different from each other.

"I'm sorry… Mikey" Raph said, feeling extremely guilty for making the small teen tearing up like this. "Look, if it's still okay with you, ya can sit with me and my brothers at lunchtime. If you want of course" Raph quickly added, not wanting to force Mikey into something he wasn't comfortable with. Slowly Mikey looked up to Raph, his blue eyes sparkling softly again.

"I'll try… thanks Raph.." he said with a soft smile.

**TMNT**

**Hehe.. more questions, but I promise, next one will have some answers, in a way :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**As promised, there will be some answers in this chapter! :D **

**TMNT**

To say he was afraid was an understatement. He was trembling on his legs, staring at the reflection in the mirror while rubbing his blond hair dry. The moment Raph had left his side because he had his own lesson, and Mikey was left alone they came at him. Dragging him off into the empty boy's dressing room, the purple dragons. And honestly, he didn't even blame them for doing it.

He wasn't a normal teen anymore, he was famous for the wrong reasons and he couldn't relate to the ones that grew up normally, or the ones that never sinned in their lives but he couldn't find a reason for them not to do it, dragging someone into a different room and beating the one up that had caused his family so much hurt.

And despite that exact realization he was still trembling on his legs in both fear and pain. Every time another tremor wracked through his body another bolt of pain would shoot up his spine, the exact spot where they kept on hitting him. He couldn't feel any blood seeping down his back and he was grateful for that, he didn't need another scar on his body.

His head was throbbing slightly from the blow on his head but the blood had already clotted long ago, and the remaining blood has been washed out. He sighed miserably and stumbled backwards until the back of his knees hit the bench. Slowly he sank down and buried his face in his hands, gritting his teeth and forcing the tears away.

He had to accept this was his school right now, he couldn't transfer, not again. This group was way less violent, the worst ones of the purple dragons were still on his old school, and this group of purple dragons wouldn't do the things that _they _would do, things he had done too. Years he had tried to deny the fact, but as soon as he made that decision not so long ago and everyone suddenly knew, he realized he was just like them.

Despite his vows not to cry he couldn't contain the few tears that were now slowly leaking down the side of his face. He didn't even understand how he could still cry, how he could continue to break down like he was doing right now. It felt like his body would just give in any time now, crumbling in a pathetic mass that no one would care about.

And as much as he wanted to go 'home' right now, get away from the people around him he couldn't. He had to accept his new school, accept that there was no way escaping right now. He made the choice years ago not to tell, and he made the choice to tell them about it. The only reason why he was here right now, because of what he did that faithful night.

TMNT

He was still trembling slightly but he had steadied himself enough to go into the cafeteria. His hair was still slightly damp but all the evidence of the blood had been washed away and the wound was now covered with his blond, and slightly spiky hair, the bruises that were slowly forming on his back were covered by his oversized black with orange hoodie.

As he slowly walked through the cafeteria he nervously glanced towards all the people around him, some watching him as he walked past. He didn't liked the way they were looking at him, every second they were looking at him could give him away, and they could discover who he really was. He wanted to turn away, walk outside and just sit alone again but he had promised Raph after all.

He had honestly no idea why but he trusted the violent red head. Maybe it was the fact that they were Japanese, and the chances of them knowing anything were so small, Mikey was willingly to take the risk but even he couldn't fool himself. There was something about Raph that made him feel protected. The purple dragons weren't picking on him, and didn't even dare to do so. He was safe with Raph, and the teen accepted him, until he figured out that is.

He took a deep breath before walking over to the table where Raph sat. Next to him was his older, twin, brother Leo and next to Leo was their youngest brother Donnie. There was a slight blush on Donnie's face as he was talking to the girl sitting on the opposite of him, a girl with red hair that was bound into a ponytail but he couldn't see her face.

Next to the girl was one other boy. He had black hair and it was slightly longer than 'usual' boy haircuts, almost like Donnie's hair. He wore a black with white bandana around his head and he was wearing a torn and black sweater. Nervously he pushed past the urge to just walk away and stopped next to Raph, slowly taking the empty seat next to him.

"Glad ya good make it squirt" Raph joked and flashed him a small grin as he noticed the small teen sitting down next to him. Mikey smiled slightly, feeling a lot better and shyly looked around the table, taking in the faces of the new people. The red-headed girl had a light skin and had freckles under her deep blue eyes. She wore a bit of mascara, but you could barely see it.

She was pretty, Mikey couldn't deny and he couldn't help himself but to glance at her slightly. She softly laughed as Donnie told another joke before her eyes trailed towards the new teen, and her light blue eyes suddenly caught Mikey's eyes. Mikey's breath hitched slightly but before he could break the silence another voice cut in.

"What do you think you're doing?!" The guy next to the muscular guy hissed through his teeth. "WE don't want you here scum!" Mikey's eyes widened slightly as he looked into the face of the black haired teen. A few teeth were knocked out of his mouth but he his teeth were practically bared and his eyes were narrowed with determination and filled with pure hatred, and he instantly knew it was _him. _

The freckled teen shrank back slightly as his eyes looked into the brown eyes of the human in front of him. A teen he remembered a little too well. But unlike _her,_ he was carrying hatred instead of the fear and the tears that had been pouring down her face. Something he could never forget, how much he wanted to.

"What the hell Casey?! What do you have against Mikey?" Raph hissed, glaring back at the teen. "He's not going anywhere" Raph added and kept on staring. Eventually the guy, apparently Casey, tore away from Mikey's now fearful eyes and landed on Raph's bright green eyes. Mikey wanted nothing more than to go away, he didn't want to cause any trouble and certainly not be confronted with Casey _again. _

"Sophie" Casey hissed towards Raph, knowing too well that Raph would understand, before turned back to Mikey. "Are you happy now _Mikey_. When will be the next one, or more importantly _who_ will be the next one?" He continued and slammed his hands on the table, standing up with a loud bang. The whole cafeteria turned their heads but after a few seconds went back to their own table again.

"What are you talking about Jones, and what does your little sister have to do with him!?" Raph half yelled but contained himself, the last thing he wanted to do was attract more attention to their table to whatever Casey's problem was. He couldn't believe what Casey was even trying to say, or why he had brought up his little sister.

"If you're too idiotic to see Raph, I'm outta here. I'd rather die right here than to be with him for another second" Casey spat out before grabbing his bag and turning away, storming out of the cafeteria. Mikey swallowed heavily and gazed down to the table below him. He shut his eyes slightly, starting to tremble on his seat, he had gotten way worse, but somehow the words hit him, hard.

He wasn't ready to be confronted with him, not yet and he would probably never be. He knew he would be on this school, and he would be able to survive passing him at times in the hallway, but not have him blow up like that, even though he was completely right when he did so. Raph was still staring in confusion but that soon turned into rage and he slammed his hands on the table like Casey had done and turned towards Mikey.

"You. You keep sitting here, and I'm gonna talk to that numbskull, understood?" Raph gritted through his teeth, looking at Mikey before standing up. Mikey nodded softly but didn't say anything in response, silently watching as Raph practically stormed after Casey, an angry look on his face. Mikey sighed miserably and reached for his bag, no matter how hard he tried, he kept hurting innocent people and destroying relations.

TMNT

"Casey what was that all about, have you lost your mind or something!" Raph roared and pressed his underarm against Casey's chest, throwing him heavily into the stone wall outside the school building. Raph was a little shorter than Casey but unlike Casey Raph had trained his whole life to be a ninja, and Casey couldn't help but to feel a little trapped.

He was Raph's teammate and together they would occasionally go out on a patrol, if Raph wasn't patrolling with his brothers, and while Casey was pretty good, he lacked the discipline that was required to be a real ninja, one of the reasons Casey got hurt so often. And while he couldn't deny he was slightly intimidated by Raph's gesture, he wasn't backing down either, continuing to glare.

"You're a trained ninja Raphael but you still can't see when crime is right under your nose" Casey hissed, his voice dripping with venom. Raph frowned slightly and loosened his grip on his human friend, he didn't understood what Casey was suggesting. Mikey was far from a criminal, and how did he even know about him, and if he really was a criminal, why wasn't he in jail?

"That piece of scum" Casey started, suddenly pushing Raph away and grapping his shoulders, slamming Raph into the wall like the red haired teen had done just seconds ago, and coming dangerously close to Raph's face. "HE was the one who kidnapped and tortured Sophie and HE was the one who killed her!"

**TMNT**

**Also, the next chapter will have some mentions of what happened to Sophia, you've been warned! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay first of all I just want to say that Sophie isn't the same girl as the one Mikey was talking about in the first chapter. After I posted the chapter I figured you might think that or something, but they aren't the same. Both will play an important role later on when everything will become clear :3 Also, I said it in the last chapter, but this chapter will have some mentions of what happened to Sophie, and it isn't nice… Now we got that out of the way, enjoy the chapter! **

**TMNT**

Casey was almost authentic to Raph. He was pretty short-tempered, not the smartest one in school and he was devoted to the football team, and frankly he was one of the best players in the team. His grades weren't really good but they weren't too bad either. And together with Raph they got sent out of the class pretty often. He loved fighting alongside with Raph, and while he wasn't a trained ninja like his friend, he did pretty while apart from the frequent injuries he'd sustain during those night patrols.

There was however one big difference between them, his past. Not many people knew about it, but Casey used to have a little sister, and he rarely spoke of her. A girl he loved with his whole heart and made him smile even in the darkest times. Ever since his mother had passed away, he felt like it was his duty to care for his little sister while his father couldn't do it because he was too busy making enough money to keep them together.

Because without the money they could take their family apart, sending them to foster care. But they managed, and Casey acted like Sophie's father, or the mother they didn't have anymore. Casey was 9 when his mother passed away, and Sophie was 4 at that time. He raised her, learned her to read, helped her with the little homework she had and brought her to school and defined who she was. But it all changed when he was just 12 years old, his 7 years old sister got kidnapped.

The one he had vowed to protect, the one he raised like it was his own daughter from the age of 9, the only reminder of his mother, and then she was just gone. It wasn't the first abduction in the area, and it was clear it was once again the same kidnapper that had been active over the last 3 years. Three months he had searched for her, skipping school, ignoring his friends, beating thieves for information and asking the whole town for any sign of his little sister.

The police were doing everything they could, but it just wasn't enough. Three moments after she was kidnapped they found her near the river. Her fingers had been broken multiple times, cuts were all over her body, whip marks on her back and she had been raped, multiple times. And despite all of that, they couldn't identify the one who was responsible, and Raph didn't even know they had but Casey just told him that Mikey was the one responsible.

Raph wasn't sure how to feel, he was angry and he felt bad for Casey. His best friend loved his little sisters so much and If it was really true he fully understood him, blowing up like this and not wanting to be around Mikey at all, but on the other side he felt so angry. He couldn't imagine Mikey as a killer, the one who would torture an innocent child. He was shy, scared and hurt, he could see it in his eyes.

Casey had ran off the second he had spat out those words, that Mikey was the one responsible for his little sister and Raph couldn't stop thinking about them. Casey seemed to determined, so sure about what he was saying but no matter how hard he tried to imagine it, he couldn't do it. He couldn't imagine that same scared teenager breaking the fingers of a small girl, but he had no idea why Casey would tell lies, if they were even lies.

Hours had passed since that 'incident'. When he got back to the table he had heard that Mikey had fled directly afterwards without saying anything, Leo couldn't even stop him from running away. The little b boy was way too fast to be stopped, and eventually disappeared into the crowd. Raph wasn't really surprised but he still cursed at the young teen for running away, despite being told not to do it. But Raph also knew he wasn't the one to order him around or something.

He felt protective, he wanted to shield him from whatever was after him. Maybe it was the look in his eyes he recognized from his little brother, the pure look of hurt and helplessness. He didn't know anything besides the fact that he went looking for him, despite Leo's reasons that he still had classes afterwards. They could be stolen for his liking, all he wanted to do was find Mikey, and it wasn't like it was the first time skipping school.

And even after hours of searching for him, he didn't find him. He wasn't at the park he was at yesterday, he wasn't on the streets, nowhere. Not really surprising figuring how big New York was, the little teen could be anywhere in New York city, but Raph tried nevertheless. And it wasn't until it started to rain softly that Raph went home. Soaked and without any trace of Mikey.

**TMNT**

"I've honestly never seen Casey like that Leo, he was completely furious, he has never acted like _that_, ever. Not even against the purple dragons or some random thief" Raph groaned as he grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl his older twin brother was holding. Donnie had his legs covering the whole length of one of the couches in the living room while Leo and Raph were occupying the other.

Raph's hair was still slightly wet from the rain he had gone through to find Mikey, without any success and he was dressed in some simple sweatpants and he wore a plain white shirt. Their father had gone away for a while, not planning on returning before midnight so they still had a few hours alone, and they had all decided to do a movie night tonight.

"I don't know Raph, he has always been protective over his sister, if anyone would talk about her in a way he didn't like.." Leo started hesitantly but he too could not explain why Raph's best friend would react like that, he was the one who brought up his dead little sister, and not Mikey. And just like Raph, both Donnie and Leo couldn't believe Mikey would do something like that.

"You were there Leo, he started himself" Donnie cut in from the other couch before fixing his gaze on the screen again. Rain was hitting the windows hard and they could even hear the hard wind blowing inside of the house, even despite the volume of their television and the way their house was isolated. And sometimes there would even be lighting, closely followed by a loud thunder. It was close by, probably above New York even.

"I'm sure Mikey will have a logical explanation, besides you will see him on Monday again, let's just enjoy our Friday night with whatever movie Donnie has chosen" Leo cut in, grinning sheepishly at his youngest brother. Donnie merely rolled his eyes but couldn't contain a snicker himself. It wasn't a secret Donnie always picked some 'boring' science movie when he could pick a movie. The movies nights has sort off been a tradition ever since they left Japan.

They were really close back in Japan but that changed slightly when they came to America. They got into different classes, there were more classes in the school, more students and they each got their own friends. Raph soon befriended someone from his football team, Casey Jones and they immediately clicked together. While he still had many other friends.

Leo soon made many friends too and even a 'small' crush like Leo would always call it. On Karai none other. A girl from Japanese origin, just like Leo. Donnie soon made a lot of friends too, despite him being nervous because of his past. He even met a beautiful red-headed girl named April, and it was plainly obvious they both liked each other, but none of them dared to admit it.

And despite being accepted on their new school, and in a completely different country with different habits and traditions, they slowly grew apart. They each had their own friends, sport clubs, after school activities, so they decided to do a movie night once in a while so they'd still hang out with each other and it soon became a tradition to have one on a Friday night. One of the reasons they were closer than ever.

Hours ticked by and near the end of the movie the raining hadn't stopped, it only got worse. Trees were slamming their branches against the houses and the rain was still going after all these hours. They had predicted it but neither of them had expected it to be so heavy. It was now 8pm so they still had a few hours alone, that is until their doorbell rang. Leo suspiciously raised an eyebrow, looking over to his brothers.

"Is anyone expecting someone?" Leo questioned cautiously. No one sane would go out in this weather, if that person wouldn't want to be soaked within seconds. Despite it being somewhere around September, they had warned New York about the cold weather and the heavy rain. He scrambled up slightly and looked over to his two younger brothers, but they both shrugged, indicating they didn't know either.

Leo frowned slightly and stood up, walking over to their hall. Their father was really protective over them, especially at night so the door was locked with numerous locks and safety arrangements so they were safe at night, even though they could probably overpower everyone who came at them. Leo sensed Donnie and Raph standing behind him as he undid the locks, feeling another presence at the other side of the door at the same time.

Before he opened the door he quietly grabbed one of his katana's Raph had handed to him. He knew he was being ridiculous but he too heard the rain outside of their house, the clear warning about the heavy thunder and the extreme cold, and it was safe to say it was really suspicious that someone would still be out there right now. Slowly he reached for the door and opened it.

If someone would mug them or anything, he'd be prepared. He, however, wasn't prepared for the boy that was now standing in front of him. Mikey's arms were wrapped around his body and huge tremors were wracking through his body. His eyes were red from crying and he was completely soaked and freezing. His hair was plastered to his face from the rain and he wasn't wearing anything besides the hoodie he had this morning.

"I-I'm s-…sorry" He stuttered, struggling with the words as he continued to tremble from the cold. "I-I h-have n…nowhere t-to go.. c-can I c-come in?"

**TMNT**

**Hmmm.. not happy about the second part at all… Also due to busting my finger during hockey, and teachers thinking we have no life, updates may come a little later than planned … **


	6. Chapter 6

_Okay, the ones who follow me on DA already know this, but I'm temporarily stepping away from FF. This week, and last week, was/is very busy because we have our holiday next week, and teachers want to complete projects and all. And I'm finding myself very stressed out the last few days, studying for tests, making homework, handing in essays etc. And on top of that reading, writing reviews, responding to Messages, and I feel so bad not responding directly, but at the moment I just can't combine it. _

_I will get to it next week, during the holidays. , so I won't be long gone, but the ones that do expect something like a review, will have to wait :( And now onto the real story ^^_

_**TMNT**_

_Mikey's arms were wrapped around his body and huge tremors were wracking through his body. His eyes were red from crying and he was completely soaked and freezing. His hair was plastered to his face from the rain and he wasn't wearing anything besides the hoodie he had this morning. _

_"I-I'm s-…sorry" He stuttered, struggling with the words as he continued to tremble from the cold. "I-I h-have n…nowhere t-to go.. c-can I c-come in?" _

I was frozen in place, which was pretty ironic figuring that the boy right in front of me was the one trembling from the intense cold. And even I could feel the cold already penetrating my skin, sending shivers down my spine. And yet I could do nothing for a few seconds, only stare at the young teen, the same teen that ran away after I came back from talking to Casey. And the same one who supposedly killed Casey's sister.

"Idiot" I suddenly grumbled and reached out for his soaked jacket pulling him inside, immediately shutting the door with a loud bang. Mikey winced slightly but I completely ignored it. "Donnie get some dry clothes for him, Leo get some blankets" I ordered immediately and ignored the weird looks I was getting. It wasn't often I acted like this, and honestly I wasn't really sure why I was.

Leo and Donnie exchanged a look with each other but when another shiver wracked through Mikey's body they both disappeared. I allowed a quiet sigh to slip past my lips and dragged the teen with me, my hand gripping the wet orange hoodie. Neither of us spoke as I led Mikey to the living room and basically pushed him onto the couch. I didn't know why but somehow I wanted to protect this kid.

Maybe it was the fact that I could recognize the look in his eyes. Even though Donnie wasn't my real blood brother, he was still my little brother, I loved him. And I recognized that same look Donnie would have when a panic attack would kick in. He didn't have them as often as he used to have, but once he did have them they were bad. And the same helpless expression was in his eyes, pleading for help. And maybe that's why I wanted to help him.

And maybe it was because I wanted answers. Casey was my best friend, he had been for the whole time I had been in America, which wasn't that long at all if you think about it. We soon became good friends because we had so much in common. I was one of the few he trusted his secret with, about his little sister being kidnapped, tortured and killed but even I didn't know who was responsible.

I was only seeing an innocent and scared boy that reminded me of my own little brother. Never did I even consider that that boy could be the killer of Sophie, if I were to believe Casey's story. Don't get me wrong, he is my best friend regardless of what he says and I want to believe him so badly but I just can't. No matter how hard I try, I can't imagine Mikey being a killer. In fact, if I didn't know better I'd say he'd be the one to be kidnapped, just like Sophie.

"You shouldn't be out at this point Mikey, why where you even…." Leo stopped mid-sentence and wrapped the blanket around Mikey's shoulders, rubbing it fiercely in an attempt to dry his clothes, but as expected it wasn't working. Noticing it wouldn't work Leo lowered the blanket and sighed. "Mikey, I think you should take off your clothes…" Leo hesitantly said as he noticed Mikey wasn't planning on stopping to shiver any time soon, and with the wet clothes still on it wouldn't get any better.

"Nice way of putting it Fearless" I smirked when I saw the shocked expression of the small teen in between Leo and me and I turned towards Mikey. "Don will get ya some dry clothes to warm you up, so ya need to take these off" I continued and gestured to the soaked hoodie he was still wearing. Mikey's arms were wrapped around himself and he was shivering so badly right now.

I waited patiently, I tried at least but I've never been the patient one and after a few seconds of him not responding I couldn't take it anymore. Donnie was already standing behind the couch with some warm clothes and I recognized them as the ones he used to wear before he got his growth spurt. And Mikey wasn't planning on moving any time soon, just staring with his blank eyes to the TV, and yet he wasn't looking at all. I sighed again and reached for his drenched hoodie, ready to open the zipper when a surprisingly strong hand stopped me.

"NO!" Mikey suddenly yelled panic and dread filling his voice quickly, and from the corner of my eye I could see Donnie cringing slightly but I simply looked down at my wrist. Mikey's hand was now engulfing my hand and yet he couldn't hide the tremble in his limbs. The source still unknown to me, either from the cold or from the fear he was feeling for some reason "Don't take off my hoodie" Mikey softly whispered and retracted his hand again, wrapping them around his body again. The loud boy we just saw gone again.

"Mikey" My older twin softly breathed out. The blond teen took a deep breath and lifted his head towards Leo. I couldn't see his eyes from this angle but I could see the reaction of my older brother. The same damn reaction he would have when looking at Donnie when he was having a panic attack once in a while, guilt, pity. Neither of us said anything and Leo slowly brought his hand up to Mikey's shoulder.

"Listen Mikey, I get you may feel uncomfortable or something but if you don't take them off you can't get really sick, pneumonia even." Leo said in a soft tone. It felt weird, we barely knew this teen, just met him like a day ago and yet he was sitting here, trembling from the cold and us comforting him. Offering him into our house without a second thought, offering him dry clothes and our companion. And yet it felt so natural.

Mikey slowly dropped his head and nodded faintly while another shiver was making its way down his spine. Leo and I glanced at each other for a second before my older twin gently unzipped the zipper from his hoodie, carefully prying the wet cloth article from his body. Revealing a white, and just as wet, t-shirt underneath it. Mikey numbly lifted his arms above his head and allowed me to take off his shirt.

Immediately I was greeted by a large gasp of my younger brother, who was still standing behind the couch. I frowned slightly and turned towards him. Donnie had his hand on top of his open mouth and his eyes were wide with fear, but not the fear we were used to. Mikey's head was lowered and I slowly followed Donnie's line of sight, landing on Mikey's back.

"Mikey what the…" I half yelled as I spotted the source of Donnie's fear. Old and new cuts and lashes were on Mikey's back, some were still fresh and were still far from healed. There were too many, way too many to count and unconsciously reached for them, gently ghosting over the wounds on his back. Mikey stiffened slightly beneath me because of the touch but I ignored him, completely focused on his scarred back.

"Who did this to ya?" I whispered, too shocked to say something else. No wonder Mikey didn't want to take off his jacket, no wonder he freaked out so much when we tried. He was trying to hide these from us. And only that made me realize that whoever did this to him, and whatever the reason, it was bad. And how much I hated it, unconsciously images of my little brother's back flashed through my mind.

Mikey took a deep breath, as if he was trying to compose himself, fighting the urge to cry and looked away in shame. His head was lowered and he wasn't looking at either Leo or me and at the same time his head was slightly turned towards my older twin. And just with taking off his clothes, I knew he wasn't going to talk any time soon. I wasn't someone who was patient or anything, and honestly I knew I shouldn't be pushing but I couldn't help it.

"Mikey, who did these to ya?" I said with a stern voice. The same voice our father would give us when we did something wrong, or when he knew we were hiding something from him, which he somehow always figured out. "Mikey" I pushed again, but again the young teen didn't respond. I just wanted to know right now what was happening to him, and Casey for that matter. I wanted answers and I hated being left out, or not knowing something important.

"Raph…" A soft voice interrupted me and I looked up to see my younger brother, now standing in front of me, instead of behind the couch. "You shouldn't push him, you know that" He softly said and I cursed under my breath. Of course he'd bring that subject up. Of course he would go with guilt. From the very first panic attack Donnie used to have I wanted to know why, why he was having them, and what they actually were.

He was my brother, even though we didn't share the same father, or mother, we were brothers without a doubt. And when he got his first panic attack, or at least the first one I knew about, I wanted to know what was happening to my little brother, who was doing this to him. Donnie was haunted by his past, that was the only thing I knew back then and I wanted more. But my younger brother wasn't ready to tell, yet.

My dad and older twin told me that I shouldn't be pushing the subject, that I should leave Donnie alone on this particular matter. And much to my shame, I didn't listen. I continued to ask him, I wanted to help my brother but I ended up hurting him. That was the second time I saw him having a panic attack. Donnie had later assured me that it wasn't really my fault, but I was still feeling guilty.

"Hey Mikey" Donnie softly said and tipped his chin up slightly. Mikey's eyes were sparkling slightly and there was doubt and fear in his eyes. "Here put these on, you must be freezing" he said gently and the fear in Mikey's eyes vanished slightly, not having to talk about those cuts on his back. Fear being replaced by an ounce of relief. He nodded numbly and with icy movement he put on the pyjama that Donnie used when he was younger. A thin yet warm shirt.

"You said.. you had nowhere left to go, right?" Donnie cautiously asked when Mikey was done, trying to break the awkward silence as Mikey got rid of his wet pants and slipped on the same grey sweatpants as I was wearing, only those were smaller than mine. "You can sleep in our guest room if you want, dad wouldn't mind, right?" Donnie asked and looked over to Leo, who nodded in approval.

Dad always loved helping other people and it was no secret. Each time either Leo, Donnie or me brought someone home who couldn't go home for whatever reason they slept in our guest room. Dad had no problem with taking in friends for a night and neither did we. The guest room wasn't very big, there was a small bed and a nightstand next to it. The walls were plain white and apart from that little furniture, it wasn't very special.

When we, or dad, bought the house it was had 5 bedrooms. One for dad and three for us. The last one that was originally equally big as ours was transformed into a guestroom with a storage closet. Half of the room was stacked will all kinds of boxes with stuff we didn't use anymore but dad refused to throw away, the remaining space, which wasn't very much, was used for the guestroom. So it wouldn't be a problem to take Mikey in for the night.

"I-I don't want to bother you" Mikey softly spoke up, still shivering slightly from the cold but with his new dry clothes he was already starting to warm up slightly. I snorted slightly at his comment. Kid was basically freezing and risking pneumonia due to the extreme cold, and yet he was even considering he was 'bothering' us. Heck, if it would've been any random teenager, we would've helped him.

"Don't be ridiculous, ya look exhausted and ya have nowhere to go" I pointed out, gesturing to the obvious bags under Mikey's eyes. "'Sides yer not bothering us at all" I added with a smirk and stood up, offering him a hand. The kid beneath me hesitated for a few seconds before he grabbed my hand and I hauled him up. His hair was still dripping from the rain and was now hanging slightly in front of his face, and yet again I couldn't help but to think of my own little brother.

I ruffled his hair slightly, causing water to go everywhere in an attempt to dry it. He began to whine playfully and shook his head slightly to get away from my touch but even despite that I could see him smiling as I ruffled his hair dry, or as dry as I could with my hand. The whining however stopped when a yawn hit him and he immediately clamped his hand on top of his mouth to hide it. I smirked and raised my eyebrow, giving him a _'I said so'_ look.

"Alright, you win" Mikey huffed playfully and laughed slightly. "Just for tonight" He added with a low voice but I still caught it. I shook my head slightly and rolled my eyes, something was telling that me that Mikey wasn't telling the truth, even if he didn't know it right now but I wasn't planning on arguing with him, not at this moment at least.

"We'll see" I merely said and signed for Mikey to follow me as I walked towards the stairs leading to the first floor, and the guest room. And the kid needed it. His steps were slow and he was obviously tired. And yet I was curious about that. Sure he seemed exhausted, but not enough to be causing _that._ His head hang low and he was barely walking at all. His eyes were low and they had lost the little light that was still present just seconds ago. But he needed his rest for now, so for once I decided to listen to my family, and not pressure him.

I quickly gave Mikey some blankets and a pillow, wishing him goodnight as I stepped out of the room. I never closed the room fully though. Still peeking through it to watch him. He shuffled slightly in his bed until he wrapped himself up tightly, squeezing his face in the blanket and eventually falling asleep. And only then I dared to leave him.

**TMNT**

Also, I recently found this beautiful drawing of human turtles, that were really close to the ones I imagined! Mikey is identical to what I had in mind, Leo and Raph come really close. Leo seems a little bit older, and Raph's hair is more spiky all over, instead of 'shaved' at the sides. Only Donnie is completely different, with long hair instead of short.

The drawing is from **_lorna-ka _** so if you're interested, I suggest you really check it out!


	7. Chapter 7

My heart was beating in my chest so hard it was getting uncomfortable. Blood ran down my arms and I knew I had cut open my wrists again because of all the struggling. I didn't care, my mind was only focusing on getting away. My muscles were screaming for me to get out, to get away from him. The room was dark and the only light was from the small light bulb in the middle of the room. _His_ face was covered by the shadows that were in the room.

The chains were wrapped tightly around my wrists and excruciating pain was sent up my body at every tug I would give. Every futile attempt led to the same pain once again. My shoulders were hurting from my arms being forced behind my back and I could feel pins and needle all over my legs. I didn't know how long I had been here, I just knew I wanted to get out of here. But I also knew I was deserving everything that was happening to me right now.

"Hello _Mikey_" and uncontrollably shiver ran down my spine and I cringed slightly at the pain it caused me. My back was still littered with cuts and lashes from the last day, and they hurt just as much as they always did. I bowed my head and squeezed my eyes shut, if I didn't respond, maybe he would just leave me alone, maybe he wouldn't hurt me today. Tears appeared in my eyes as I heard him nearing and a quiet sob escaped my lips.

"Thud thud, don't gimme that" The creature in front of me mocked and reached for my back, putting a firm hand on my back and pressing down. A soft cry of pain escaped my lips and I immediately bit my lip. I wouldn't give him that, I just wouldn't. He snorted at my reaction and yanked my shirt up, exposing my back. I whimpered slightly and all color drained from my face as I heard his hand being drenched in water. I started to struggle slightly and he seemed satisfied for a second.

A last snicker came from his mouth before his hand was placed on top of my healing scars. The salty water slipped in my healing flesh and before I could stop myself I cried out from the pain, writhing and struggling to get away from the pain but the person was too strong and the hand stayed right where it was. My back burned and I could feel fresh tears rolling down my cheek.

I let out a whimper of relief when the hand left my back but before I could even say anything he reached for the chains around my left wrist. I paled again, even if I couldn't see myself, I knew I was paling. My heart started to pound again as he unwrapped the chains and slammed my left hand on a stone in front of me. My eyes widened as he grabbed my finger and I looked up to him.

"N-No… p-please don't" I pleaded with tears in my eyes but of course he wouldn't listen and my eyes returned to my fingers. Three of them were already swollen, bruised and throbbing continuously. The pinky's bone was pressing slightly at the skin, inexperienced and his first break. The ring and the middle finger were clean breaks, he knew what he was doing right now. I struggled as he grabbed my index finger.

"Don't cry please, this is better for you" The person said before snapping the bone. Excruciating pain shot through my hand and I cried out in pain as the bone snapped. "Stop crying" The person growled and crouched down. My breath hitched in my throat as I looked up, suddenly the pain was all gone. I could only feel the shock when I looked at the person in front of me, I was staring at a boy with blond hair and bright blue eyes, I was looking at myself.

* * *

**TMNT**

A loud scream awoke me from my sleep. It was a high scream filled with hurt hat I couldn't directly place. I knew my brothers' screams. Leo's screams, Raph's scream. I even knew what dad's scream sounded like. Though I rarely ever heard it. The only fear he only visibly showed us was the fear of losing any of us. No, this was a different scream, that I couldn't place directly, until I remembered the blond haired boy that had come to us yesterday, freezing and soaked with rain.

Not even bothering to put on some decent clothes I threw off my covers and walked outside my room. There was a cold feeling outside my warm room and it was brushing against my bare arms. While I was merely wearing a thin t-shirt, I was wearing a pair of sweatpants so I wasn't really bothered by the cold in the hallway.

I walked further down the hallway and stopped when I reached Raph's room. But I wasn't looking for his room, I was looking for the room that was straight across it. I didn't even know why I was still bothering to be silent but I silently approached his door, stopping for a second to listen to the noises in the room. Loud breathing could be heard from the other side of the room but nothing else.

"Mikey?" I said in a low voice and opened the door slowly, not wanting to freak him out. Light filled the small room and illuminated Mikey's tear stricken face. "What happened?" My voice was unsure and I just hoped the teen wouldn't actually detect it. It felt weird standing here, looking down at the crying teen who I barely knew. I didn't exactly knew what time it was, but I was pretty sure it was already past 12, Saturday. That meant I had only know this teen for three days now.

The blond haired teen let out a quiet sob and turned his head away, pulling his legs close to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. My eyes landed on his slightly bent back. His white t-shirt was tightly pressed against his back and through it I could see the few biggest cuts on his back. Some were swollen but obviously long healed.

"t'was nothing Don" He mumbles, successfully snapping me out of my thoughts. I blinked a few times and blushed slightly as I noticed that the bright blue eyes were now focused on mine. I coughed awkwardly and slightly closed the door but not enough for the room to turn completely dark. I sighed and walked over to his bed, knowing better than to believe his lie.

That was 3 weeks ago. And still he is using that same excuse over and over again. His nightmares didn't get better, not a bit, and every time we check on him he always tries to assure us it was nothing to worry about, and we should just go to bed again. He is a good liar, I must give him that, but the sweat trickling down his forehead and the near panic attack gives him away.

"Not this time Mikey" I interrupt him before he can even speak those cursed words. The teen in front of me blinks in surprise but I ignore it. I was angry, I couldn't deny that, but I wasn't angry with him. I was angry with whatever or whoever caused this. The nightmares, the refusal to speak about anything that happened in the past, and the quietness when we mentioned Casey's sister.

I never saw my own eyes during my own panic attacks, but Leo and Raph had described the look in my eyes when I woke up screaming for help, the look of horror in my eyes. And that same look was on Mikey's face right now. It crushed me to see him scared like that. I knew what he was going through, to a certain extent, I have been there too.

Over the last three weeks Mikey has grown on us. The first morning he was at our house he was shy and quiet, and practically refused to eat because he didn't want to bother us. Of course we wouldn't let him leave without him eating, and even after we forced him to eat, he wanted to leave afterwards, saying once again he didn't want to bother us, and yet again we wouldn't let him. Leo had locked the door and had hid the key so Mikey wouldn't be able to leave at all, and only then he had fully given up.

We didn't do anything that day, just hanging around and goofing off a bit. And by the end of the day Mikey was laughing as well, and was prepared to eat the food we offered him. It was weird at first, taking in a complete stranger but right somehow. He only left our house alone once, to get his schoolbooks and homework from his home, but he returned right after getting them.

I knew something was off about him, terribly. And it had to do something with his situation at home. His parents never called for him, never alerted school that Mikey hadn't been home for three weeks now, apart from the little visit he had weeks ago. His parents never questioned his disappearance from home, or the fact that he still appeared at school.

I sighed softly and walked over to his bed, sitting on the edge and looking over to the young teen in front of me. Once again Mikey refused to look at me and turned his head away, using the back of his hand to wipe away the tears. In the last weeks we had become really close, all of us had, but to me he was like the little brother I never had. And like every older brother, I wanted to protect him.

"Listen Mikey.. this has been going on for weeks now, why won't you talk about it?" I asked softly but like I expected Mikey didn't answer. I took a deep breath, if I couldn't help him by asking, maybe I could by showing him that I knew the feeling. Can't say I wasn't nervous but I wanted to help Mikey, and one thing I knew was that I didn't tell anyone about it at first because they wouldn't understand what I was going through, or at least that's what I thought.

"Mikey.. you have to talk about it otherwise it'll tear you apart from the inside out" I softly pressed the issue but he still didn't respond. "I know it's scary to talk about what happened, I know it brings back memories, and I know how you feel. But you have to talk about it eventually" I continued and he let out a short huff and mumbled something I couldn't understand. I raised an eyebrow and watched him.

"You don't know what I'm going through Don." He huffed, anger lacing in his voice. It was weird hearing him angry, I rarely saw him like that and I knew from my immediate older brother that it was a way to defend himself. Raph often did it when he was sad or hurt, he would always use anger to scare people off and while Mikey rarely did it, he still used his anger to scare us off. Not like it was helping in any way. Leo and Raph knew better than to back off when he used this technique. They couldn't do it with me after all.

"Mikey, I know you may think that. But I know what you're going through. The burden of caring the secret with you, not being able to tell the people you trust. And the never ending nightmares." I said softly and reached for my shirt with shaky hand, pulling it over my head so my back was fully exposed. I turned slightly so I was sitting with my back towards him and lowered my head.

A low gasp was all I heard from Mikey and seconds later I could feel cold fingers tracing along the long wound on my back. I stiffened slightly beneath his touch and memories came crashing down again, the same cold fingers holding me down and me screaming for them to stop. I wasn't there anymore, they couldn't hurt me anymore I told myself. Mikey's touch was soft and he was obviously not trying to hurt me or anything, even though it had already been healed long ago.

There was a long scar going all the way from my left shoulder down to my right hip. The scar uneven, ragged and slightly swollen, a pink color from the damaged flesh. I started to dig my fingers into my legs, resisting the urge to reach for the swollen scar and swallowed heavily. Eventually Mikey's fingers left my back and I turned around as well, and put on my shirt again. I sighed slightly as the fabric covered the scar, I always felt so vulnerable without it.

"What happened?" Mikey breathed out and I closed my eyes. I knew this question would be coming. It was my choice to show him the scar, and with that my whole past but it still scared me to talk about, yet after all these years. Mikey was now sitting cross legged on his bed and from the faint light I could see his eyes were a slight shade of red from the tears.

"You know I was adopted by dad when I was just three months old?" I asked and Mikey nodded so I continued. "I lived with my parents for two months, I don't remember them by face, but my old neighbors told me about them. They were always drunk, and mentally unstable, though nobody knew why. One night my neighbors heard noises from my house and they eventually called the police, not trusting the situation. They found me in my crib, crying my heart out with a broken arm and bruises all over my body" I started and swallowed heavily. As more images flashed through my mind.

_I don't remember their faces like I said, but I can still see them hitting me, and hurting me. The neighbors told me they were always fighting and their relation was weird. They would occasionally hit each other but they also 'loved' each other, if you would still call hitting each other love. I was an accident, my mother told the people in their streets more than once. I wasn't planned but they kept me, and that was probably their biggest mistake. _

_They hated me, I would cry every time I wanted something. Every time I was hungry, or I was bored I would start crying, which my mother 'kindly' told the rest of the neighborhood. They tried to take care of me the right way but they failed to do so, and after a while they started to hit me whenever I cried. The rest of the neighborhood suspected things, I was never taken outside again and I would be left alone a lot. _

_One day the neighbors were just done and they called the police, saying they continuously heard me crying for hours. When they rang the doorbell nobody answered, they had left me alone again but not without hitting me again. The police forcefully entered the house and found me crying with a broken arm and deep bruises all over my body. I was taken to the hospital, and after a month I was well enough to be put up for adoption, and dad adopted me. _

_I was very scared as a baby, I can't remember anything about that time but dad told me about the times I randomly started crying when he wanted to pick me up, and I was obviously afraid of people because every time I would be alone I would stop crying, but the moment someone entered the room I started again. It got less over the years as I lived with them and we were happy, that is until my biological parents decided to show up again when I was six years old, just weeks after they got out of prison. _

_They waited for me until I was alone and they… they dragged me towards the back of an empty house and pushed me onto the ground and onto my stomach. Mom sat on top of me and cut through my shirt, leaving me with nothing but my pants. She kept telling me how much I screwed up her life by crying so much, and that my adoption had caused her a huge negative social status. People looked at them as child abusers, and on top of that I got them into jail for 6 years. _

_They carved into my back with a knife and then ran away afterwards, laughing and shouting in joy, while they left me in the grass. My back was bleeding heavily and a puddle of blood was forming beneath me. I laid in my own blood for a long time before dad found me and called the police. I was rushed towards the hospital but luckily the wound wasn't life-threatening, though I did end up getting a blood transfusion because of the amount of blood I'd lost. _

_They caught my biological parents at the border of Japan and arrested them. I never saw them ever since but they had already done enough damage. The vague memories I'd hidden so far came floating back, and new ones were added. Ever since I had been terrified of blood, having laid in my own blood. I used to get a lot of nightmares and panic attacks but once I grew older they became less. And when we moved to America I got better medical treatment and they could exactly determine what triggered every panic attack. Ever since I rarely have them anymore. _

"Point is, I had them too, I know what it's like to be carrying the burden of not wanting to tell the ones that want to protect you. But I also know that talking helped me. So please Mikey, you don't have to talk to me, or right now, but please talk about it to someone" I pleaded, my voice turning from sad to a desperate tone within the same sentence. I just felt so helpless, not being able to help him.

I sighed as I finished my story, there were a few tears in my eyes but I bit them back. Mikey looked dazzled for a while. He was staring at me the whole time I was telling the story but I shielded my eyes from him on purpose, knowing I would cry if I did look at him, but right now he was the one who turned his face away, looking at his shaky hands beneath him.

"You'll hate me Don, you all will if I tell you" He mumbles after a few silent seconds. I frown at his statement. If there was one thing I had learned when talking about my past it was that nobody ever blamed you for telling, and I could hardly imagine us being able to hate him, even if he had only been with us for three weeks right now.

"We won't Mikey, I promise" I said with a confident voice but I too felt nervous saying those words. I had seen Mikey the last three weeks, not very difficult figuring he was practically living with us at the moment. But I had seen his repulsive nature towards his past, whatever had happened to him in the past. How happy and cheerful he could be until we brought up his past, or Casey for that matter and once again transformed from the laughing teen to the shy and scared one we saw at school.

"Everybody else already does" Mikey huffed, trying to keep his voice straight but failed as his voice cracked at the end. I didn't know what to say really, so I asked the only question I could think of.

"Why?" The question sounded so stupid, and yet I couldn't help but to ask it. I wanted to know why everybody was hating, why everybody seemed to be repulsed by him. It was really strange at school. Half of the people were either talking behind his back and didn't want to be near him or were bullying him. And the other half was treating him like a normal shy and bullied kid. And I had no idea why they were like that against Mikey.

"Because they know" Came the answer and then he completely broke down into tears, his whole frame shaking and shuddering because of the tears that were now flowing down his cheeks in endless rivers. I did the only thing I could think off and reached out for him. I don't think he even noticed me wrapping my arms around him but I didn't care at the moment. I brought him closer to my chest and allowed him to cry. And he did, he continued to cry for 10 minutes until exhaustion took over and he passed out.

* * *

**TMNT**

**Is it bad to say I'm not happy with how this turned out..? Because I really don't like it :/ Though we now finally know what happened to Donnie! Which somehow makes up for the chapter.. right? *shuffles away slowly* **


	8. Chapter 8

"Raphieeeee!" Mikey yelled from the couch and I cringed slightly at the volume of his voice. None of my brothers were ever this loud, not even when me and Leo were arguing again, at least not as much as Mikey was. And yet a smile tugged at my mouth as I walked over to the living room. Mikey was sitting on the couch with his head falling backwards, attempting to look at me walking into the room. His messy blond hair was hanging downwards and his head was slowly turning read from being upside down.

"Bonehead" I sniggered and pinched him under his neck. A giggle came from the young teen beneath me and he flew forwards, rolling of the couch until he hit the ground. I laughed at the display, it was something I discovered the second day he was here, he was extremely ticklish. Especially his sides, but his neck was a weak point too, something we often used against him when he was either feeling down again, or at times like these when he was being an annoying brat again.

"No fair Raph" Mikey huffed and rolled onto his hands and knees but I caught the smile on his face nevertheless and I playfully crossed my arms.

"Ya were asking for it" I merely shrugged and jumped over the couch, landing perfectly on the couch. "So why'd ya call me?" I asked, looking at the teen beneath me with a raised eyebrow. Mikey grinned slightly and jumped up, diving onto the couch with his knees first. The couch protested slightly beneath the sudden weight but I knew the couch was way too strong to break down like that.

I always thought Leo and I were abusing the couch too much, but Mikey takes the word to a whole new level. He's lucky the couch is very old and dad doesn't really value it anymore, otherwise he'd be lectured way too many times already. Jumping and running over the couch, practically abusing the furniture. Though he was smart enough to keep the expensive furniture alone, he never held back with the old couch.

"I'm bored, entertain me" He dramatically yelled and dropped himself onto me. I grunted slightly under the extra weight but Mikey wasn't really heavy. Which actually scared me very much but that was yet another thing I had noticed over the last three weeks. I grumbled and Mikey blinked a few times with his bright eyes before cracking an innocent smile. I chuckled slightly and grabbed his feet, flipping him over so he was laying on his back.

His eyes went wide when I approached him, knowing full well what I was going to do. "No wait Raphie, mercy MERCY" He screamed as I effectively pinned him down, his arms above his head and using my left hand to pin them both down. His eyes were wide but I recognized the sparkle in his eyes, and when my fingers touched his sides he immediately broke down in a fit of giggles. "No R-R-Raph. Hehehe.. no s-stop" Mikey squirmed beneath me, trying to wiggle out of my grip but I didn't release him and he continued to laugh.

I left his sides alone for a few seconds, allowing him to catch his breath again. I repositioned my hands slightly so I had a better grip on him and I reached for his sides ones again. A loud yell echoed thought he room as Mikey once again burst into laughter, squirming harder and trying to kick me off using his feet. I couldn't help but to laugh to at the squirming bundle beneath me and I left him alone again and he hastily breathed in, trying to make up for his lost oxygen.

"Oh boy, they're at it again" The voice of my older brother suddenly interrupted us and I looked up in confusion. Leo was standing in the door opening with his arms crossed in front of his chest but a grin plastered on his face as he looked down on both me and Mikey. "Come on Don, let's leave those two alone, I don't want to end up like Mikey again" He snickered and grabbed Donnie's arm, dragging him along and into the dojo, who followed voluntarily.

"Good idea Leo" Donnie sighed, still remembering the last time they did but turned around before entering the dojo and gave me a playful wink. "Just don't try to kill each other 'kay?" He snickered and before I had time to even react he was gone into the dojo. It wasn't his fault both him and Leo were caught beneath me and Mikey wrestling, they were both watching a movie at the time in the living room.

Mikey was hanging out in my room going through all the stuff I had. We were both just messing around until Mikey found an old photo album, and of course he needed to grab the one with that horrible photo in it. We were still in Japan at the time me and Leo were born, and because of us being twins they couldn't say for sure whether we would be boys or girls. But mom had some kind of instinct we were going to be girls.

So she bought us two pink stuffed toys instead of blue ones, or non-gender colors for that matter. But despite the fact that it was pink, it was still the first gift we ever had, and somehow I couldn't be separated from it when I was a baby, and neither could Leo. The photo was made when Donnie had fallen down while we were playing. His knee was slightly scraped and I had immediately offered him my stuffed toy. Sensei made the picture when we had both fallen asleep on top of the pink animal.

Of course he had to find that particular picture. I couldn't get it over my heart to throw it away because I wanted to keep it, but I never intended on showing anyone else. He had mocked me, though I knew it was meant playfully, and before I even knew what was happening I was running after him. His scream mixed with laughter still rang through my mind as he raced off the stairs with incredible speed.

He hid behind Leo and Don in the hope I wouldn't get to him, thinking I wouldn't want to disturb my brothers. But that didn't stop me and I jumped on the three of them, taking them all down at once. Though it was funny, Leo and Donnie weren't planning on doing it again, maybe it was because none of us got out of the wrestle without bruises, or a punishment from dad. I smirked at the memory and returned my attention to Mikey, who was still squirming beneath me but due to the huge difference of training between us I was way stronger than he was.

I raised an eyebrow, giving him at least an opportunity to get out of my grip but the only response I got from him was him sticking out his tongue. Taking it as an invitation I reached for his sides and started to attack him once again. His head slammed back and his mouth opened in a silent laugh. He started squirming once again and when I pressed down harder a loud laugh escaped his mouth.

"HAHAHAHA NO PLEASE R-RAPH" He laughed and I continued with my assault until tears were rolling down his cheeks from laughing this much. And only then I let him go, slowly starting to pity him. I helped him up since he was laughing way too much to haul him up himself. We were both laughing from what happened just seconds ago and Mikey used his sleeves to wipe away his tears.

"Ya still bored?" I grinned and poked his sides to emphasize my point. He let out another fit of giggles and jumped from the couch, shrieking slightly as I jumped after him. He was fast, I couldn't deny that but I eventually caught him and tackled him to the ground, barely missed the couch again. He laughed slightly again and pushed me off of him, and I let him this time figuring I had abused him enough already.

"No, I'm fine dude" He said quickly and giggled again. He stood up and fell down on the couch, grabbing the remote and turning on the TV. I rolled my eyes and threw a controller at him, taking the other one myself. He looked surprised for a second before he smiled to me and we both started playing games.

**TMNT**

My eyes were burning from staring at the screen and I'm sure Dad would've yelled at me long ago if he were here. But just looking at the excited teen next to me made me continue playing. Even after hours of playing this game he was still enjoying it, and laughing at every mistake he was making. He wasn't good at any of the games, he never played them before he said, his dad never bought him game, or even a TV.

It saddened me because Mikey obviously had missed playing in his life. At first he would take every occasion to play games, and only stopping when dad made us stop. Only one of the reasons why we were still playing games. Dad was very busy at the moment. The dojo was very busy lately, mothers didn't allow children to walk alone through the city at night because of numerous disappearances over the last years.

This was the reason he had most of his lessons when it was still light, and when he was done with those he still have a lot of paperwork to fill in because he refused to work during the weekend. Ever since he we had moved to America he had been more occupied, and while the Friday evening was our movie night, the weekend was always a time when dad was home and we spent time with him.

Once again a 'victory' sign came from my half of the screen and I blinked a couple of times. I had lost track of how many times I had won. I had allowed Mikey to win once, but he immediately caught me and told me he would rather lose fairly than to win with him cheating, or someone pitying him. Kid stayed to his word, even though he lost all the time, he still kept laughing.

While Mikey was yet again starting up another game I dropped my controller and rubbed my burning eyes. It was already dark outside and the moon was almost full. Despite the bad weather we had the first night Mikey came to us, it was only mildly raining at the moment. Leo and Don were upstairs, but other than that I had no idea what they were doing. It was late already, but not enough for 16-years old teenagers to go to sleep already. Though Mikey seemed to be pretty tired already.

I picked up my controller as Mikey started another game but before the match could actually begin my phone rang. "Hang on a minute" I called out and Mikey immediately paused the game so he wouldn't beat me while I was talking on the phone or anything, like that would ever happen. My eyes instinctively closed slightly when the sudden bright light hit my face, only then really realizing how dark the room around me was.

My eyes took a quick glance at the blond teen next to me as I say who was calling me, Casey. "Yo Case, do ya have any idea what time it is?" I responded the caller but no anger was present in my voice. Mikey's reaction was immediate, his smile faded the instant I called out Casey's name and he loosened the grip on his controller, gazing downwards in the same shy gesture I recognized from the first time we met him.

"Hi Raph, yes nice to see ya too bud, no haven't been doin' much lately" Casey mocked me at the other side of the line and I grinned at him. "Anyways, ya got anything to do tomorrow after school, got nothing to do myself" The tall teen continued on the other side.

"Sure Case-man, tomorrow your house?" I replied while glancing at Mikey next to me. Kid was ready to stand up but I immediately put a hand on his shoulder, preventing him from walking away. It was no secret that Casey and Mikey didn't like each other, though it was very weird. Casey hated Mikey with every fiber of his body and did everything he could to make his life miserable. Throwing things at him in class, calling him names and generally avoiding him.

The only reason he hadn't beat up Mikey yet was the fact that I wouldn't allow him. Casey is my best friend and sure, we beat up bad guys a lot of nights, but teenagers who have done nothing wrong is something I won't allow him, especially when that kid practically lived with us at the moment. Mikey is the complete opposite. He's repulsed by Casey, and not in an offensive way.

Every time Casey comes up to me, or I call him for that matter, he grows very quiet and often tries to walk away from the situation. And not a single time he had even considered telling me what is going on between them. Casey isn't better either. Every time I bring it up, trying to find some answers he shuts down completely. He grows very cold and the only thing he says is that Mikey killed his little sister and I shouldn't be hanging out with him.

"Why is it always my home Raph? Yer house is way bigger" I sigh slightly and look at Mikey again. By the look on his face I know that he has heard what Casey just said. I just try to ignore him for now, I had to convince Casey first.

"You know why Casey, 'sides what's so special about my house? You have more games anyways" I pointed out and this time I could hear Casey sighing on the other side of the line. Mikey shifted uneasily next to me, knowing a little too well he was the reason why. I wasn't favoring anyone here. Casey was my best friend, but Mikey was a friend too, and Leo and Donnie liked him too. I couldn't pick between those two, not over something I didn't know, and Casey and Mikey couldn't stand each other.

I tried to keep them both happy. Mikey was at our home and I hang out with him, but I hang out with Casey too, just not in our house. We tried once, but the confrontation between him and Mikey didn't end very well. And with that I mean Casey storming out of the house and leaving Mikey crying himself to sleep in Donnie's arms. I hated it, seeing my best friend and the boy I wanted to protect hate each other like that.

But most importantly the fact that they wouldn't tell what was going on between them, because even though Mikey never tried to defend himself against Casey's accusation, I still didn't believe Mikey could be torturing anyone. All of us had tried to get him talking, even dad has, but he never told anything. Donnie has been the closest just two days ago, but that wasn't more than a simple 'you'll hate me if I tell you'. Don even told him his secret, and yet Mikey was too afraid to tell what was going on.

"Why are you siding with _that_? I'm yer friend remember, your best friend. Not that pathetic excuse for a human being" Casey spat out, venom dripping from his voice. Anger welled up inside of me. Casey was right, he was my best friend, and I've allowed him to talk badly about Mikey, I've put up with his insults again Mikey but right now I just snapped.

"Damn it Casey, I ain't siding with anybody here!" I yelled and ignored the cringing motion Mikey made next to me.

"You know damn well you do Raph, you never want to hang out with me at your house again, only because that piece of scum is at your house all the time" Casey spat at the other side of the line. Though he was right, I always hang out at Casey's house because of the incident with Mikey and Casey the first time Casey came to our house when Mikey was here, but I wasn't siding with anyone here, I was trying to keep them both happy!

"Well maybe you two should tolerate each other a bit more! Ya keep hammering on the fact that he supposedly killed Sophie." I shot back and stood up, wandering over to the window. Rain was still ticking against the window but the moon was still visible high in the sky.

"Supposedly killed?! Bullshit Raph! He did it, his name is all over the internet! But if you're too thick to admit that your little friend is a killer.." He yelled and before I could even say anything else to him he had hang up. I cursed inwards and threw my phone on the couch, hard. Why did he have to be like that?! Why did everything have to be like this, I was losing my best friend, and how much I hated to think it, it was Mikey's fault.

"Don't ruin your friendship with him because of me Raph, I will get out of the house if you want" The soft voice of Mikey suddenly echoed through the air. Damn kid was blaming himself again, and he had every right to do so. I bailed my fists and cursed again, something that could get me grounded for life but I couldn't care less at the moment. I wanted to understand. Why did they hate each other? I couldn't believe it was Sophie, and what did Casey mean with him being all over the internet? I was too angry to think about that at the moment.

"Yer not Mikey!" I yelled in frustration, I knew I had to go away, somewhere else before I said something I'd regret, but I didn't. "If you two would just tolerate each other, if you would just… if you would just tell me what is going on between you guys none of this would be happening right now! Yer the reason Casey is angry at me right now!" I screamed, not being able to stop myself in time. I slapped my hand on top of my mouth when those cursed words left my mouth and Mikey was left in a state of shock, his eyes wide with betrayal and hurt.

I wanted to say something to him, say I didn't mean it but I was too late. The blond teen was already gone, running upstairs and slamming a door, and I knew too well which door that was. I cursed and ran after him. Of course I wasn't fast enough to prevent him from locking himself in the bathroom and I started banging on the door, screaming for him to get out.

"Mikey please come out, I didn't mean it like that" I screamed through the door, trying to open the door as I was continuously banging on the wooden material. My hands were protesting and begging me to stop but I didn't care. I never meant to hurt him like that, I just wanted to.. I don't know what I wanted, the only thing I knew was the fact that I messed up badly.

I hated it, not knowing something, and not being able to help the ones I tried to protect. It was exactly the feeling I had when Donnie refused to tell me what was happening to him, the same helpless and cramped feeling I felt when seeing him in the hospital all of a sudden. I was dying to do something, I couldn't stand the feeling, I didn't know what I wanted. I just knew I wanted to do something, anything.

"Raph what are you doing with the door?" I cursed again and whipped my head around, Leo and Donnie standing behind me with strange looks on their faces. Donnie's face was a mixture of confusion and.. fear? "Raph, where's Mikey..?" He softly asked as he noticed I wasn't answering his first question any time soon. I ignored him again and started banging on the door again.

"I hurt Mikey, he's in there. I need to talk to him" I ranted and wanted to deliver another blow to the door but my older twin caught my hand. He gave me a short nod before he crouched down and started to pick the lock. I cursed again, of course this would be one of those things I couldn't handle myself and something my brothers had to help with.

When the door flew open I immediately stormed inside, only to find nothing. Mikey was gone, just gone.. I blinked a couple of times before my eyes found the open window. My anger completely flushed the instant I saw the open window and I shakily walked over to the window. A flash of blond hair was the last thing I saw of him. It was cold, and it was still raining, and Mikey had no jacket with him.

"Damn it!" I cursed and turned around to face my brothers. "Don't just stand there, we have ta find Mikey!" I yelled and ran past them, down the stairs to grab my jacket. I was desperate to find Mikey, but not stupid. Donnie and Leo came running after me seconds after and put on a jacket too. I opened the door and started running into the direction Mikey had gone to. Only one thing on my mind.

_Mikey. _


	9. Chapter 9

My fault, it was all my fault. _Yer the reason Casey is angry at me right now_. It was my fault Raph's friendship was being destroyed, it was because Raph was protecting me. I had done it again, I was destroying families from the inside out, something I had been doing for so long right now. I wasn't worth it, Raph shouldn't be ruining his friendship with Casey because of me, I just wasn't worth it.

I've heard them talking, Raph and his brothers. They didn't believe Casey, they didn't think I could kill anyone, let alone torture them. They were wrong, and they had no idea how wrong they actually were. Everything Casey had told them was true, every part of the story he refused to tell them. I understood, the sight of Sophie was horrible and losing someone that had been like a child to you… I'd be furious too.

I would be angry too if my best friend would take in the murderer of my little sister, the one I raised as my own child. And I too would be struggling with telling the story out loud. I didn't matter, I deserved everything that was happening right now. I regretted every part of it, but I never regretted my last decision. It was to protect _her, _it was all because of her. She told me to be brave, and I did. And that's what saved her life, while it had been lost long ago.

My spiky hair was falling over my forehead and water was dripping down my face. The rain wasn't hard, not as much as it had been _that_ night but my t-shirt was still wet from the rain and my hair was still dripping. I wasn't even running anymore, not even walking. I was constantly tripping, tears clouding my vision. I didn't even look where I was going, where could I go?

Raph blamed me, one of the few persons who still tolerated me, simply because they didn't know. And he blamed me already. Maybe that wasn't even the hardest part. It hurt me to think that I had lost one of my friends, but the thing that hurt me the most was the reason because of it. It wasn't the reason everyone hated me and wanted to kill me right now, it was because I was ruining his friendship. I was destroying Raph's life, just like I had done with Casey's life so long ago.

I had ruined Casey's life when the toothless teen was just 12 years old. I knew him, that was the worst part. I didn't play with him on the streets but I knew him nevertheless. Sophie was a sweet little girl, the definition of the perfect student herself. She was smart, kind and caring. And that was exactly why it was my first victim. Sophie and _she _were very much alike. They were both young, carefree and very kind.

The only difference between Sophie and her was the fact that she was still alive, or so I thought. Sophie had fallen after three months, while _she_ managed to get out, but it was already too late. She had already died long ago, the only thing that remained was the body of the girl but all the joy in life had been stolen long ago. She was my last, after that things went down to hell and my life would be ruined forever. But I deserved it.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I barely noticed the fist nearing me. It wasn't until spiking pain shot right through my head, and my body hit the ground with a loud thud I noticed the figures around me. Hoodies were on top of their heads and they all wore masks in front of their faces. I moaned slightly and rolled over, shakily bringing myself to my hands and knees. Stars were dancing in front of me and my whole vision was turning white.

Pain shot through my head again when two hands wrapped around both my wrist and I was dragged off. My head was spinning and I was quickly starting to get lightheaded. I lulled my head backwards, facing the rain to get an ounce of relief. Nothing helped, and it definitely didn't help when they threw me onto the stones again. I groaned and tried to roll off of my back but before I could do so something heavy landed on my stomach.

My hands were placed next to my body and something hard was placed on top of them. I mumbled, struggling slightly to get away from the painful pressure but I was too weak to do so, the hit on my head leaving me dazzled and disorientated. My eyes fluttered open and to my horror I was staring right into the face of Fong, the leader of the purple dragons. His knees were pressed down on my arms and he was sitting on top of me.

"You… piece of shit" Fong hissed and spit right in my face. I grimaced and tried to reach my face but Fong was firmly on top of me, allowing me little to no movement. Pins and needles were already spreading among my limbs. The other members of the purple dragons were standing around me, all looking down at me with hatred and disgust, I knew why, it was because of _her_. The only reason they didn't just hate me, was because of Yue.

"Why..?" I whispered and I winced again. My voice was soft and my head was throbbing. Rain was falling down continuously on top of my head and right now I was happy it was raining, at least they wouldn't notice my tears right now. My question however wasn't appreciated. The moment the question left my lips a strong fist was pressed against my throat, pressing down until it was painful and I was wheezing for every breath.

"You dick, she fucking killed herself tonight" He spat out, and to my surprise tears were spilling down his cheeks. My eyes widened, no, Yue couldn't be dead. I saved her. She wasn't supposed to die. She was strong, she handled everything so far. Why did she kill herself? And only then I noticed Tao standing a few meters behind the rest of the group, and it was obvious he was struggling to keep his tears at bay.

Fong and Tao loved their little sister so much. They changed so much when _she_ was gone. They never appeared at school and much like Casey they did everything to find their little sister, but not even after 7 months did they find her. They both loved her dearly but Tao was the youngest of the two, and spent the most time with his little sister. He helped her when she got free just half a year ago, while Fong turned to me. Blaming for me for kidnapping and torturing Yue.

"I-I didn't …" I wheezed, trying to at least say something but the fist was pressed harder against my windpipe. My eyes widened as I was unable to take in enough oxygen, so this was what it felt like. This was how it felt to be the one not being able to breath, and unlike any other time I wasn't the one pressing my thumbs against someone's throat.

"Stop talking god damn it" Fong cursed but freed his fist from my throat. I choked on a sob as air was once again allowed through my windpipe and into my lungs. "Are you happy now? You finally managed to get her killed. And it was all because of you and that other dick, you two should be hanged, you don't even deserve to live" And with that another strong fist hit me, this one finding my way into my ribs.

I cried out when I felt pain shoot right through my ribs and I screamed in pain. It didn't last long however, the second after the agonizing scream left my mouth a hand was placed on top of my mouth, preventing me from screaming. A strong slap was placed against my temple and I allowed to drop my head to the right, wincing as I landed on top of the place where they hit me with a fist. And to my horror I could smell blood, my blood.

White spots appeared on my vision once again and I just prayed that someone has heard my scream before I completely blacked out from the pain.

TMNT

I was losing it, I was honestly losing it. Mikey was out there, somewhere. It wasn't very cold but without a coat it could be, and especially with the rain he could catch some sickness very fast. Though that wasn't the thing I was worried about the most. I was worried about what I said. I blew up on him, telling him he was the reason the friendship between Casey and me was fading, which was totally not his fault. It was the whole situation we were in right now.

But the worst thing was that I blamed him for not talking about whatever happened to him. I never forced him to tell, but it wouldn't make a difference if I had. I blamed his secret for the fact that Casey was now angry with me. Mikey was visibly upset, and over the last few weeks I had experienced what it meant when he was upset. I had to find him before he did something stupid, or something happened to him. It was my fault that he was gone after all.

"Raph, don't you think you're exaggerating just a little bit? Mikey is not much younger than we are, I'm sure-" Leo started but was cut off by an horrible scream that rang through the air. My eyes widened upon the scream, I knew that scream. I've heard it way too many times already, it was Mikey's scream. It took only seconds for me to react, but I was running before I knew. Going straight to the noise with my brothers running behind me.

We weren't far away from the scream and when I ran around the corner my eyes widened. Far into a dead alley was Mikey, the alley was clouded slightly but I could make out his blond hair. And what scared me the most was the fact that he wasn't moving at all. There were only 5 of them and much to my horror one guy was pounding on Mikey, while the other ones were standing around him.

"Get away from him!" I roared and charged towards the cowards. I ran into the guy that was hurting Mikey and knocked him onto his back and away from Mikey, landing on top of him. "Fong, I should've known" I hissed when I saw his face and bared my teeth. While many people seemed to pick on Mikey, the purple dragons were clearly the worst. And how twisted as it sounds, I could actually see them doing this, beating up a defenseless boy.

"Listen to me Fong, 'cause I'll only say it once. I don't care what Mikey has done, you stay away from him from now on, understood?" I growled but before he could even answer I punched him, hard. He cried out and blood spat out of his mouth, along with a tooth. I didn't care at the moment and I hauled him up by his collar, pushing him towards my older brother. Leo glared at the leader and threw him into the wall before leaping towards the remaining purple dragons.

There were only three left, for some reason Tao was already long gone when we showed up. I didn't care, the sooner we got rid of them the sooner I could get to Mikey. I growled loudly and leaped towards a small blond guy, Luke. I didn't even bother to hit him, he was already shaking and the knife in his hands was shaking as much as he was. I grabbed the front of his jacket and brought him close to my face.

"Get out, NOW!" I yelled and shoved Luke backwards as hard as I could. Luke staggered for a few steps before he fell backwards, landing heavily on his wrist. He cried out and reached for his wrist, looking up to me with pleading eyes. I glared at him and before I even knew it he was running. With Luke gone I turned around towards Leo, he was fighting off the remaining two. However these were prepared and weren't as scared as Luke had been. And the fact that Leo didn't have his weapons didn't help either.

I jumped towards my older brother and hit one of the guys, Jian, separating him from Leo and his buddy. He continuously threw punches at me but I easily defended them. They were uncoordinated but at the same time he was incredibly strong. Jian threw another punch and this time I caught him, sending him onto the ground. I whipped my head around and I froze when I saw Donnie on his knees next to Mikey and staring at his hands which were coated in blood and a terrified expression on his face, his hands shaking.

I wanted to run towards him but a fist stopped me. The fist hit my left eyebrow and I growled in anger and pain. I could feel blood starting to seep through my eyebrow and I knew he had broken the skin with that hit. I shook my head slightly to clear my head and jumped at him, the guy was very strong and we ended up wrestling for dominance. Not letting me go for any second. Which also meant I couldn't help Donnie.

"Leo get Donnie out of there and call 911!" I yelled as loud as I could before I was thrown into the wall. I grunted and jumped up again. Blood was now coating the whole left side of me face and I charged at Jian again, tackling him so we both landed on the ground. Blood, Mikey was fucking bleeding, and the worst of all was that Donnie couldn't even handle a tiny bit of blood, it would only remind him of his past.

I growled and hit Jian hard against his shoulder, he cried out and rolled out of the way. I glared at him and he shakily stood up, looking over to me with anger lacing in his eyes. "He deserved it, you know that right?! Yue killed herself today because of that piece of shit" He spat out before turning around. He didn't even bother running and casually walked over to his buddy on the ground, the one who fought Leo. I narrowed my eyes and only then I noticed the guy was Sid.

Blood was oozing out of his nose and a large bruise was already forming on his cheek. Jian hauled him up with his non-damaged arm and gave me an angry glare before running off. I snorted slightly and wiped the back of my hand over my eyebrow. I knew I should be scared or at least surprised to see blood on my hand but I wasn't, Mikey was the only thing in my mind.

"Mikey" I yelled as the last two were gone as well and I ran over to the motionless figure on the ground. His eyes were partly open and were clouded with pain. I dropped to my knees and hauled him up, I instantly sat down and placed his head on top of my lap, bringing him close to my chest. Blood was on top of his head wound but it was already clotting. His blond hair was drenched with blood and water and his eyes were focused on me.

"Yer gonna be okay Mikey. Leo's calling 911 right now, the ambulance will be here soon" I tried to assure him, wiping away the tears that were slowly leaking out of his eyes, quickly glancing at Leo to see if he was really calling "I didn't mean it y'know, I shouldn't have blamed you for me and Casey, it wasn't right" I continued and a shiver wracked through him. He was trembling slightly and he was wheezing, his chest rising with difficulty.

I re-positioned him slightly and I carefully zipped my jacket open, taking it off and placing it on top of him to keep him a little bit warmer. "Stay awake Mikey" I hissed, patting him slightly on the cheek. His eyes were slowly dropping and it was obvious he was struggling to stay awake.

Leo had now ended the call and was looking over to me, giving me slightly nod. We weren't that far apart and he was holding Donnie tightly but it looked like Don was faring well. He had stopped trembling and was now looking over to me and Mikey as well though dried tears were on his cheeks, but his hands were hid from him, which still had Mikey's blood. Sirens could be heard and I knew they were close. I looked down again and squeezed Mikey's hand slightly, encouraging him to stay awake.

A smile ghosted over his lips but it was weak and he closed his eyes again, dropping his head completely. He was out cold before I could stop him. Not even seconds after that an ambulance neared us and parked right at the beginning of the alley, immediately two men jumped out of the ambulance and ran over to Leo.

"Help them first, Mikey's hurt worse" He said, and although none of them knew who Mikey was they immediately understood what he meant. They grabbed the stretcher and ran over to us. They placed the stretcher next to us and the blond guy bent down next to me, tilting my head up to look at my bleeding eyebrow while the other guy hovered Mikey from my lap and placing him on the stretcher.

"I'm fine okay, it's just a small wound" I said and slapped his hand away, my first concert was Mikey. The blond guy wasn't even impressed by my actions, probably had much worse in his life, and nodded to me. He gave me a pat on the shoulder and turned towards Mikey, gently prodding at his ribs. Mikey mewed slightly in pain but didn't wake up. After that the guy turned his head to the side to see the wound on Mikey's head.

"Your eye isn't bad but we'll need to stitch it up at the hospital" The blond guy said eventually but I simply nodded and turned towards Mikey, waiting for him to tell how he was doing. "His ribs are either cracked or bruised, and his head wound needs to be stitched. What happened here?" He continued as he carefully cut through Mikey's shirt, revealing an already bruising chest.

"He ran away after I said something to him… we found 'im on the ground with 5 purple dragons around them. Fong, Tao, Sid, Luke and Jian. They were beating him up while he was unconscious. Me and Leo fought 'em off but Don couldn't handle the blood because of his past, and Leo had to get him away" I told them and stood up. Blood was still pouring down my face and the blond guy handed me a tower to press against my face. I gratefully accepted and pressed it against my eyebrow.

"I see, he will need to go to the hospital as well, just to be sure he is okay. Traumatic experiences with blood can be pretty bad. And I highly doubt you'll leave each other alone, am I right?" The blond guy called out and I nodded. Like hell we were going to leave someone behind. If one of us would go, we would all go. The other guy hovered the stretcher up and fastened all the straps over Mikey's body so he wouldn't fall off the stretcher.

I winced slightly at the sight. The fact that we needed to call 911 was already bad enough, but seeing Mikey so helpless on the stretcher was another thing. And while they were wheeling Mikey inside the ambulance, walked over to Leo and Don. "They want to check you up in the hospital just to be sure" I said and offered Don a hand, who gratefully accepted it. And right now I was so happy I had the towel, so I could hide my bleeding wound from my youngest brother.

"I know, it just freaked me out again" Donnie answered shyly and I nodded, knowing how he hated his fear of blood. "How bad is your eye?" He asked, gesturing to the towel pressed against my eye. I shrugged slightly. It was throbbing slightly but it wasn't too bad. Probably needed a few stitches but I had those before, they stung but they didn't really hurt so I wasn't really nervous or anything. I just wanted it done so I wouldn't have to hide my face from Don.

"It's nothing, luckily Mikey isn't too bad either. His head needs to be stitched and he probably busted his ribs" I responded before the blond guy called for us to get inside as well so we could go to the hospital. It was a tight fit inside the ambulance but Donnie offered to go into the front because apparently one of the doctors had to check up on Mikey during the trip, and with the blood still on Mikey's head and in his hair, it wouldn't do anything good.

Leo sat in the back of the ambulance, the side where Mikey's head was. I sat next to the blond guy, who apparently was called Nathan. Mikey's body was strapped tightly to the stretcher so the ride wouldn't damage him and even after this little time bruises were forming on his face. His shirt was still cut off and a bruise was already showing, and he look so incredibly pale.

It looked bad, I wouldn't lie about that but Nathan had assured us he'll be fine. Leo was now calling dad to say we were going to the hospital, I wasn't about to complain, I didn't want to tell dad that we were going to the hospital. He loved us so much and always when either of us got hurt he would be so scared for us. Even if we would assure we were fine, he wouldn't rest until he could see for himself. Only to become mad at us for being so reckless, and then immediately turning back into an over-protective father again.

My face was still throbbing and every time I removed the towel it would start bleeding again, but that was normal Nathan had told me. The area around the eyebrow was very close to our vessels so when the skin broke, there would be blood instantly. And on top of that the adrenaline from fighting made sure that more blood was flowing towards my face. Apparently they had these type of injuries a lot.

I sighed and waited for the ambulance to arrive at the hospital. It started out like a normal day, me and Mikey were just goofing around, and the next moment he was outside, on the ground, bleeding and unconscious. And the worst was that it was all my fault, I couldn't wait for this day to be over.


	10. Chapter 10

To say we were anxious was an understatement. It was already past midnight when I was discharged from the hospital, though I never left. I was still feeling a bit tense because of everything that had happened but the doctors had offered me a shower and I finally got Mikey's blood off my hands and basically the rest of my body. My clothes were coated in blood as well but luckily dad took some extra with him.

I was currently sitting down, wearing my grey sweatpants and wearing some kind of sweater I'd always wear on a day off. Somehow it made me feel a little bit more secure, and I needed that right now, after everything that has happened just hours ago. Dad wasn't here with us anymore. He arrived somewhat after we arrived as well but I didn't see him until I was showered and cleaned up.

Doctors didn't let me go until my heart was at a manageable speed and they were fully convinced I was okay, and I wasn't in shock anymore. I was just so glad Dad could be with me during all those darn questions. Leo stayed with Raph while my immediate older brother was getting stitched up. It wasn't much, only four stitches, but even one stitch was too much for me. I just never wanted my brothers getting hurt. And if they needed stitches, it meant it was bad.

Dad was currently talking with the police and the doctors about everything that was going on right now, and what was going to happen to Mikey and the purple dragons. They wanted to call Mikey's parents but luckily dad could prevent it for now, I just didn't trust them, they didn't care about Mikey. Me, Raph and Leo had already told our story to the police shortly after we arrived. The only one left was Mikey, but he was still unconscious.

I sighed and looked up sadly. Mikey was just so life-less, his eyes closed and so vulnerable beneath those white covers. His ribs were wrapped up beneath them though they weren't cracked, just mildly bruised. He would need to be careful for the next days to let it heal. His head was wrapped up as well, and his head had needed 6 stitches in total. His arms were bruising a little but the nurses had cooled it so they weren't that bad, at least not something he'd be bothered by a lot once he woke up.

Of course he would feel it, but at least it wasn't too bad considering he had bruised 4 ribs and had 6 stitches in his head. I'm just so glad they didn't have to shave off his hair, or part of it. Raph was laying down on an empty medical bed next to Mikey's. He wasn't asleep however, just plainly looking at the ceiling in front of him. None of us were tired yet but we all knew we would be in a couple of hours. We didn't want to sleep just yet, all of us wanted to be awake once Mikey woke up.

Dad had assured us we wouldn't have to go to school tomorrow, even though it was already 'tomorrow', Thursday. And if necessary he would give us the next day off as well. It didn't really matter though, this Friday they'd organize some workshop so we wouldn't miss a lot if we got the day off.

I blinked sharply when a sudden noise cut through the air. I whipped my head around towards Mikey and widened my eyes, just as another soft groan escaped his now parted lips.

"Come on buddy, wake up" Leo coed, I hadn't even noticed him moving but Leo was fast after all. Raph was at his side within seconds, despite the doctor's advice to stay in bed for a few hours to help with the pounding headache Raph denied to have. Of course he wouldn't listen. Even though Mikey had only been with us for 3 weeks, he already felt like a part of the family. If he would only trust us enough to tell us what happened, the whole story that is.

Mikey groaned again beneath us and I immediately reached for his hand, stroking it softly with my thumb as a way to encourage him. Tired blue eyes fluttered open and he looked at us with confusion and another groan past his lips. His hand reached up, the one I wasn't holding, until it touched his bandaged head, only to release another soft groan, closing his eyes for a second.

"Don't touch it, ya got a pretty good hit there" Raph said and snatched Mikey's hand, though he was surprisingly careful. The blue orbs switched to me and he carefully wrenched his hand out of my grasp, going to his ribcage. He loud out a pained hiss when he touched his ribs and he looked at me again, confusion in his eyes and his breaths started to increase a bit more, almost like he was having a panic attack.

"Just take it easy Mikey, your ribs are bruised. Painful but you'll heal" I tried to calm him down but of course he wouldn't listen, struggling to get the covers off of his body. I sighed and helped him, revealing his bandages chest. The left part of the ribcage, the part where the bruised ribs where, had a small lump. They had wrapped some ice in between the wrappings to cool off the area. And it was clear Mikey was feeling the effects.

"It's for the swelling Mikey, just bear with me for a while okay?" I tried but it didn't seem like he was convinced at all, and his breathing wasn't getting better as well. "Come on, let's sit you up, doctors said it'll help you breathe a bit more easily" I said, looking over to my two older brothers to help me. I gently placed a hand on his back and hovered him up while Leo re-positioned the bed. Mikey mewed softly in pain and squeezed Raph's hand tightly but after a few seconds I gently lowered him again.

Now finally sitting in a half-sitting position he seemed to be able to breathe without too much pain. He slumped down a bit, fidgeting around to find a comfortable position and stopped after a few seconds. I smiled down at him and pulled the covers up to the midst of his chest. He stared down at his arms, briefly glancing at his bruises but for some reason he didn't seem to be bothered at all, at least not by the bruises.

"You know don't you? The doctors told you" Mikey suddenly started. I could feel my brothers' eyes looking at me but I ignored him. I knew what he was suggesting to, and I knew there was no point denying it, so I nodded to him. Something flashed through his eyes, something I couldn't identify and he closed his eyes for a second, leaning heavily against the pillow, a pained look on his face probably still feeling the pain in his ribs.

"I know about it Mikey, but I also know you didn't want us to know. So I didn't tell Raph and Leo just yet." I said and reached for the nightstand next to his bed. "Here, these will help against your ribs and your headache" I said, popping a painkiller in his hand. He nodded to me and swallowed them drily, even before I could hand him a glass of water. He took the glass afterwards and took a few sips before handing back the glass and locking his eyes with mine.

"You should tell them Don, it wouldn't be fair to withhold something from them." He suddenly said, looking as serious as he could be. "Besides, it doesn't matter anyways, now the police has been called as well it wouldn't be long before I'll be all over the news again" He sighed miserably, causing more confused faces from my older brothers but once again I ignored them. I was just glad Leo and Raph decided to stay silent this time.

"You still remember when that doctor checked on us, and on Mikey? On the clipboard he was carrying was his full name and it sounded familiar so I ran after the doctor to ask him about it." I started and both my brothers nodded, indicating they remembered. Though I hadn't told them I had gone after the doctor. Instead I had used the old 'I need to go to the bathroom' trick, that still surprisingly worked.

"Mikey Buford" I slowly said, I felt awful just saying that name, and Mikey obviously flinched beneath me. I could see the same confusion on their faces but I knew they wouldn't recognize Mikey. "His father is Carl Buford guys" They would recognize his father, no doubt. And I was right. My sentence was immediately followed by two loud gasps and two pair of eyes flew towards Mikey, who merely cringed and looked away in shame.

"Something tells me that isn't the whole story, right Mikey?" Leo softly calls out, looking over at him with worry in his eyes, and yet there was a spark of anger present. Raph was .. shocked to say at least. He was completely frozen and he was staring towards nothing, just empty space.

"It doesn't matter anymore. You already know what he's done. You all hate me now" He muttered, an angry tone in his voice. Something we hadn't seen very often. It suddenly made sense. Why he wouldn't tell me that night. He wanted to tell me, he really did. No matter how much you're carrying with you, you always want to tell it to someone to release some of your burden but sometimes the consequences hold you back. The fear of someone finding out, but most importantly their reaction.

"Why would you think like that Mikey, you're like my little brother. And I don't believe you really worked with your father. Not voluntarily at least" I gently said, sitting down on the edge of his bed. He huffed angrily and turned his head away from me, staring out of the window and looking at the moon that was now high in the sky.

I looked up at my brothers, begging for them to say something since I was out of ideas. Mikey had stayed with us over 3 weeks and we got to know him in that period of time, but one thing was for sure, he never got this angry. Of course he would get irritated at times, or he would yell at us once or twice, but he would never shut us out, not like this at least. While he would mostly still seek comfort, he was now completely withdrawing himself.

Leo was looking at Mikey with a sad expression and I wasn't sure how I was feeling myself. I already knew so I guess that's why I was taking it so well, when you would look at everything Mikey has done in his life. There wasn't much about him on the internet, but there was about Carl. The list goes on and on. Several victims, possible victims and the girl that had escaped his clutches, the only one still alive.

I was prepared, I knew Mikey was Carl's son. Can't say I didn't freak out at first but it has been 2 hours since I found out. And it was only because we were all worried they didn't notice me freaking out. But Leo and Raph just found out. Leo had always been good at hiding his emotions and yet again I couldn't read his face. There was sadness in his eyes but apart from that I couldn't see anything, Raph however was like an open book at the moment. He was visibly upset by the news. He was shocked and through all of it I could see an ounce of anger.

"I can see it in your eyes, in all of you. You already hate me" Mikey muttered angrily and tried to curl up but stopped when pain shot up his spine. A stiffened hiss escaped his lips and he returned to his back again. I sighed and placed a hand on his bandages chest.

"I'm not going to lie Mikey, I'm sure everyone is shocked here by the news" I started hesitantly, gesturing to Leo and Raph. "And if I were to believe the news, you did awful things Mikey. But I got to know you in these few weeks, and out of all of us you'd be the last person to hurt someone. I can't believe you did all of it on your own, right?"

Still don't why I actually expected him to react to my question. But I did, I waited for him to say something, we all waited. 5 minutes past and still he didn't try to start a conversation. He kept staring outside the window with distant eyes. There were no tears in his eyes, but there could as well be tears. His eyes were filled with hurt and despair.

"I was normal when I was younger, just like you"

The whisper came as a surprise. Honestly I didn't think he would talk at all. I blinked a couple of times and looked up to Leo, just to be sure it wasn't my imagination. It wasn't, his eyes were set on Mikey, waiting with those curious eyes of his while one hand was close to Mikey's hand. The blond boy never faced us, instead he continued to stare out of the window, leaving us with that one small sentence.

We wanted more, nobody of us could deny it. I wanted to know what happened to Mikey, and by the looks of it, neither could Raph and Leo. But none of us pushed Mikey into telling. We knew that wasn't going to help at all, he needed to decide for himself if he wanted to talk about it or not. Mikey took a deep breath and his face crunched up slightly in pain but he tried to hide it. Of course none of us could ignore the small hiss of pain when he moved too much.

"I lived with my mom and dad here in New York. I was happy even though my father was gone a lot… but that changed when I was 8 years old"

I rearranged my grip on his wrist and much to my horror I could feel his heartbeat. It was pounding way too fast but he was covering it up. If I hadn't felt his pulse, I would've never guessed he was freaking out like this. Raph had been silent and distant for the whole time, after the revelation of Mikey's dad being Carl but now he slowly shuffled closer to Mikey, carefully stroking his blond hair. The rain was long gone but so was the texture in his hair. Instead of having his usual small spikes it was now falling on top of his head, over the bandages.

"My mother got drunk more often, even daily and my father wasn't there anymore at all. I was left to look after my mom during the day when my father wasn't here." I frowned slightly, how much I hated to say it, it wasn't bad yet. Many teens had to go through something familiar. An absent father and a drunk mother but something told me it was getting way worse. And how much I wanted the answers, I wasn't looking forward to it.

"When I was 10 I finally discovered why my dad was absent all the time, it was the first time he took me with him. He took me to some kind of.. secret basement far away from our home… and.. t-there were two …" Mikey couldn't finish the sentence, tears welling up in his eyes. He sniffled slightly and untangled his hand from mine, using his hand to wipe away his tears angrily.

"There were two children right, two girls?" Leo tried to finish his sentence. And Mikey nodded in defeat. I couldn't stop my own tears from appearing, I knew where this was going, I knew how this was going to end. And yet I found myself hoping it was wrong. For once I wanted nothing more than to be wrong. There was a short silence, Mikey was taking short gasps trying to compose himself and we all waited patiently.

"My dad hit me that night in front of the girls. He … r-ripped off m-my shirt and hit m-my back until… until I passed out. He threatened me when I woke up, I couldn't talk to anyone about or he'd do it again. I was 10 back then, I was scared so I obeyed him" He muttered the last part, casting his eyes down.

"I knew what my dad did to them, he was hurting them but it wasn't until I turned 11 I had to hurt them as well, my first one was Sophie, Casey's sister"

And despite every ounce of sadness I was feeling right now, I was starting to get really angry. Mikey still referred to Carl as his 'dad', his father. But Carl was far from it, a father was supposed to love you, and not force you into doing_ this_ to his son. They should shield their sons from events like that. No matter what Mikey had told me, and no matter what his name says, I would never consider Carl as his real father.

Mikey was nothing like Carl. Carl was a kidnapper, he had no heart left in his body. He had lost that long ago when the first abduction took place, he lost all of his dignity when Yue somehow escaped his clutches, and so did Mikey. But apart from the fact that Carl dragged his son into all of this, there was no way Mikey was like his father. And Carl certainly wasn't his father by heart, I wouldn't give him that, I just wouldn't.

"I didn't want to do it, break her fingers, I refused but he'd kill her if I didn't…. I-I could… could… f-feel her fingers breaking… s-she cried s-so hard.. I-I'm sorry…" I frowned, trying to push down my unease. He was starting to create two sides of himself. At times he would be totally emotionless, and within the same sentence he'd burst into tears. He was crying right now, thick heavy tears streaming down his tears in endless rivers.

His chest was rising way too fast and with every breath he took a flash of pain crossed his face. Sweat was slowly trickling down his face and he started to claw at his hands, frankly rubbing his palms against each other and pinching his fingers, as if he was trying to get a reaction out of them. I carefully placed my hand on top of his hands and his eyes shot up, looking fearfully into mine. I swallowed uneasily and my other hand hovered over the nurse call button.

I squeezed his hand softly and disconnected my eyes from his baby blue eyes that were now filled with full-blown panic, looking over at my two older brothers. Raph was still near Mikey's head but his hands were now on his own lap, looking unsure at the small teen on the medical bed but I could see worry in his eyes. Leo was softly whispering to Mikey and much to my surprise he was doing it in Japanese. I knew Mikey didn't know any Japanese, he had wanted to learn but learning a language in less than 3 weeks is simply not possible, especially with Japanese.

It wasn't helping, as minutes progressed his breaths got more labored until his eyes were wide and his hands clenching his chest in pain. I didn't hesitate to push the nurse call button which was followed by a short buzzing sound.

"Easy breaths Mikey, everything is going to be okay, you're safe okay?" I tried again but just like the last time he wouldn't listen. Two nurses arrived two minutes later but even they couldn't help Mikey and they ended up sedating him until he had fallen into a drugged and not so peaceful sleep. And despite my obvious worry for Mikey, I couldn't but think about the answers we almost had.


	11. Chapter 11

**Man, times flies when you're having fun. It's officially the 7****th**** of June, which means it's my one year's anniversary. I just wanted to thank all of you who has followed me so far, reviewed my stories and read my stories. You guys mean the world to me and writing wouldn't be as fun without you guys (How to make a message too corny xD) But seriously, thank you all so much!**

* * *

"Dad killed Sophia after three months"

The sentence wasn't a surprise, all of us knew that Sophie was killed after three months. Casey had only trusted Raph at first, but eventually he told us as well. He wasn't the confident teenager anymore, he was a broken teenager who had lost his baby sister at a young age. The one he practically raised as if she was his own daughter. He acted as her mother figure while they both didn't have one anymore, and right now she was gone. All because of Carl. We knew about this, it wasn't a surprise, and yet hearing it shocked us.

All three of us were gathered around Mikey again. It had been three hours already since the doctors were forced to drug Mikey. He was having a panic attack and if he wouldn't have stopped it could have some serious consequences, I wasn't as smart as Don but I knew what a panic attack could do to you, in big lines, even Raph knew what panic attacks could do when they got too bad. Luckily none of us has experienced that yet.

The blond haired teen had woken up just 15 minutes ago. He refused to talk to us at all but there was this twinkle in his eyes that no one could ignore. He was looking at us with confusion and yet I could see a small smile tugging at his lips. We offered him some food but he wasn't hungry yet, not really weird considering it was only 5 in the morning. The sun wasn't even visible yet but it was slowly getting light again.

Dad had been with us for over 2 hours, watching Mikey and comforting us. We were 16, and yet we needed our dad in these situations, especially Don. It wasn't until he was called by the doctors that he had to leave again. The doctors had been forced to call Mikey's dad because our dad wasn't his legal guardian. But even the staff members knew about Carl's history and thought it'd be better for either of us that Carl wouldn't see Mikey just yet. And dad had to come with the doctors so Carl wouldn't make a scene or anything, not like he cared about Mikey.

None of us expected Mikey to start talking again, considering the last time he did so gave him a panic attack, but he did. A strange look of determination on his blank face. There was nothing else other than determination, no other emotion was present on his face, it was like he didn't even care, and he didn't. He thought it didn't matter anymore and that we would hate him. That's why he told us. That's why he started talking again.

I was happy that he started talking but the things he talked about were sickening. Carl raped Sophie and he had to look one time. Mikey had to break Sophie's fingers, to prepare him for later victims. And in addition he had to look while Carl whipped and cut her countless times. I was just relieved Carl didn't make him look when he killed Sophie but the 'not this time' part left me shocked again, he witnessed other girls being killed, even if he didn't say it yet, I knew he had.

"He wouldn't stop after that, he abducted 17 girls over the past 4 years and killed them once he grew tired of them….. Ashely Bates, she was the only one he didn't kill" He paused slightly, taking a deep breath. Before the last sentence even left his mouth I knew what he was going to say. "I killed her"

Despite knowing what was coming I could feel tears coming up. I took a deep breath and leaned forwards, my elbows on my legs and my face hiding in my hands. Nobody, nobody deserved this. They were all wrong, all the people who hated him. Mikey was the victim here, just as the girls were. He was forced by his own dad when he was just a kid, he couldn't stop. It wasn't his fault.

"I had to hurt them more often, and worse every time. I just couldn't do it. I was only 14 when I fell into depression. I lost all my friends, I had no one. I couldn't go home, I didn't want to go home, I didn't want to see my dad. I'd sit along the river for hours after school, I didn't know what else to do…. Yue saw me one day and sat down next to me. She didn't ask me anything, she wasn't expecting me to say anything. She just talked all day, like I was her diary" Mikey continued, a sad smile appearing on his face.

And for the first time since he had woken up I could see tears appearing in his eyes. Until now he had only been emotionless, trying to tell the story without allowing any emotion to cross his face. His face had fallen to the side and he was still staring out of the window. But I could still see his eyes, that were now building up with tears.

"I liked it, I didn't have to do anything. She talked to me, made me laugh and showed me things. Drawings, paintings and sometimes she'd make things with the flowers around us. For the first time in years I felt happy. But of course _he _had to ruin it. He saw us together, me laughing. I couldn't bond with someone, with anyone. The next day she didn't show up, I wasn't really worried, she could've gotten sick or something."

Nobody said anything, the room had fallen silent. The injured teen on the bed was opening and closing his mouth, trying to get to find the right words to say. He didn't know them, and I didn't blame him. There weren't any right words for this, nobody should be telling such a thing, no teenage boy should be going through this. Nobody should be going through this.

"My whole world fell apart when I saw her, chained up and cuts all over her. He used me, he fucking used me to get to her. She trusted him because she trusted me. If I hadn't met he, she wouldn't have been captured."

I blinked multiple times, in the last three weeks we'd met him he never cursed, never this harsh. He often swore inwards, or small words but never this aggressive. Fear was practically radiating off of him, hate for his father. And yet I refused to give him that, Carl wasn't his father, he just wasn't. The tears were now streaming down his face, single droplets covering his cheeks and soaking the white pillow beneath him.

"She was his favorite, and I had to whip her. She cried every night, looking at me with betrayal in her eyes. I betrayed her, she was my friend, and I hurt her. I.. I had no other choice, he would kill her otherwise. I just couldn't.. I couldn't continue hurting her. So after a year I set her free. She was sleeping at that time and I carried her out of the basement and onto the streets." He said, his voice deathly silent.

"I placed her in front of her house, a blanket wrapped around her. I rang the doorbell and I ran without looking back. She was safe, dad couldn't hurt her anymore." He said, wiping his tears away with the back of his hand and looking over to us for the first time during the whole story. His bright blue eyes filled with fresh tears.

"The next morning it was all over the news. Yue was back again after a year of disappearance. She never officially testified but she told that it was Carl, the police couldn't arrest him because Yue refused to officially confess and even though everyone knew it had been Carl, no one could arrest him because of the lack of evidence."

Donnie softly reached out of him, placing his hand on top of his. Mikey didn't even react to Donnie's touch. He didn't take his eyes off of the window, the only exception being just minutes ago, he didn't flinch, he didn't try to pull away, nothing. He felt empty. His voice was empty, no emotion in it. He was suppressing them, and he shouldn't be.

"When my dad found out he whipped me again, started to hit me. And even when I was down on the ground he didn't stop" I tried to stay strong but the moment the first sob left Mikey's mouth tears welled up in my eyes as well. He was struggling with his words, tears finally streaming down his face in endless rivers, choking on his words and struggling to breathe.

"He forced me into unconsciousness for 11 days. When I woke up everyone knew, about my dad and about me. Yue told her brothers what happened, me and Carl hurting her, Fong and Tao told everyone that I worked with Carl. People hated me for what I'd done, started picking on me and started hitting me"

He choked on a sob again and for a second I was afraid he was starting to develop another panic attack. His tears seemed to be endless, every second more streamed down his face until his eyes were red and swollen. His whole frame was trembling and occasionally shocks went through his body. His face was contracted with pain and his arms was curled over his bruised ribs.

"Mikey easy, yer safe here. No one will hurt ya" Raph said, trying to calm Mikey down. The blond teen didn't even look at us and curled into a pitiful ball, burying his face into the covers and moving his hands over his ears, blocking us out. Raph reached out but Don quickly darted forwards and snatched Raph's wrist before he could touch Mikey. He was refusing help, he needed this, how much we wanted to help him.

Raph grumbled and looked away, he wanted to help Mikey, I knew that look but at the time we couldn't do anything. Mikey would need to accept our help first before we could truly help him. And even so it would take a long time to help him. We would need to start at the source of his problem, his father.

* * *

The TV in front of me was on, and yet I wasn't looking or even acknowledging it. My hands were unconsciously ruffling Mikey's hair lightly, avoiding the stitches on his head. The teen beneath me had was facing away from but I knew he wasn't asleep. He was trembling slightly and I hear his labored breathing. He would shift occasionally but never making an attempt to talk to me, or answer me.

Mikey's ribs were still carefully wrapped up to prevent him from injuring them even more. It had been a long day. Mikey had been discharged from the hospital mere hours ago. Just before dinner. Nobody thought it was a good idea to allow him to go to his own home, where Carl would be. Dad had even insisted to take Mikey with us. It was a struggle because the teen couldn't really move freely with his ribs but he managed to get in the car nevertheless.

Mikey's 'dad' didn't even care. He doesn't care about his own son, the only thing he cared about was his little business that was now ruined because of Mikey. Raph was sitting next to me, Mikey's legs over his lap to keep him comfortable. He was pretending he was watching TV but I could occasionally see him glancing over to Mikey. The same worried glance he would give Donnie when he had one of those attacks.

"You know it's not your fault right Mikey?" I whispered for the millionth time in a row. I brushed some hair out of his face and I flinched when my finger caught a tear leaking down his face. "You have to tell the police Mikey, you aren't the one to blame." I continued. If he would just tell the police, everything would turn out okay. At least that's what I told myself.

If the people would just know that Mikey wasn't the one to blame. That his father made him into what he is right now, made him into a killer and someone who tortured small girls. If he would just testify, people would know the truth. But for some reason he refused to talk. After he had told us, he didn't talk to us anymore, just refused to talk to us. I opened my mouth again but something stopped me.

"Leonardo, stop this instant" I flinched slightly when dad's voice suddenly sounded through the room. His voice wasn't filled with anger but he wasn't very pleased by my actions. I shouldn't be asking him, pressuring him. I knew that, but yet I continued to ask him. Dad's face was stern but his gaze softened as he looked over to the teen on my lap.

"Mikey, would you join me in the dojo for a cup of tea?" He asked eventually, looking towards Mikey. It was a question but the way he asked it made it sound like a demand. Mikey stiffened slightly but eventually clumsily got up slightly. He hissed when he twisted his upper body too much and I immediately helped him with getting up. Once he was finally standing he nodded to me, saying it was okay for me to let go and mouthed a silent thank you.

His walk was a little strained because of his ribs but that would improve over the days, in fact he would be able to attend school again once weekend was over. Dad patted Mikey's shoulder slightly and signed for him to walk ahead.

_"I will talk to him, I believe I know what troubles him"_ He said to us in Japanese, so Mikey wouldn't understand what he was saying before disappearing from the room, walking after Mikey.


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry for the long wait guys, The last 2 weeks I've been so busy with my test week! But I'm finally free! Have to do another test on Friday because I totally failed Economics but other than some little activities, I'm finally free! So here's another chapter, hope you enjoy! :D**

TMNT

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"So why didn't he tell the police? I mean If people already know he did it…."

I closed my eyes for a second, mindlessly swinging back and forth. But how much as I wanted to answer the question, I couldn't. It wasn't like I didn't trust April, or that I didn't want to tell her, I just didn't know why Mikey never told the police. No matter how much we trust him, and no matter how much he trusts us, he refuses to talk about anything that relates to Carl or the things he did.

"I don't know April, dad wouldn't tell us" I sighed, casting my eyes to the red-haired girl next to me. "Mikey told him but dad says it isn't his secret to tell, and Mikey trusted him with the secret. It would be like betraying his trust" I eventually added with a sigh.

I couldn't lie, I wanted to know why Mikey didn't tell the police. It sure wasn't because he still loved Carl. Just two days ago, when he was discharged from the hospital, he had seen Carl. Both dad and Carl were waiting in a waiting room while Mikey was getting ready to leave the hospital. Neither Carl or Mikey spoke to each other, only cold glares were exchanged but Mikey's gesture was different than Carl's.

The large man stood tall, confident with a vague smirk on his face. And at the same time he was glaring, looking down on Mikey. The blond haired teen tried to stay strong, his eyes narrowing as he looked over to his 'father' but the bruise on Leo's arm held a different story. He was terrified and angry at the same time. He was furious but that emotion was suppressed by fear, tightly holding Leo for some sort of support, something to assure him.

There had to be a good reason why he wouldn't tell. The problem was, we didn't know it. He didn't want to tell us.

"Your dad is doing the right thing Don" April says after a while, slowing down slightly on the swing. Sun was fully shining on the playground they were currently in. It wasn't ridiculously warm but still warm enough. April and I had been close friends, ever since I moved here from Japan and that's also the reason she took me out of the house for a few hours, away from all the tension in the house.

"I know April, and I respect him for not telling Mikey's secret.. y'know it's Mikey's secret but at the same time I just want to know why" I said, looking down and staring at the sand beneath me. In these last couple of weeks the boy has grown on us. He soon became good friends with all of us, almost as close as me and April were.

He was practically living with us at the moment, occupying the guest room for more than three weeks already. He was there when we woke up, when we went to sleep. He even participated in our movie nights. We walked to school together and I occasionally helped him with homework. We were like four brothers.

But that meant we saw everything going on with Mikey. In those weeks he skipped school a lot, but never whole days. He would mostly go home after a lesson and we wouldn't notice it until we'd get back home. He would be sitting home in his room, or outside in the garden just doing nothing and staring in front of him. We would later learn that purple dragons were picking on him during classes we weren't around, though I don't believe he would have this reaction when they were 'just picking'.

We would hear him crying during the night sometimes, the cries were soft and muffled and he was obviously trying to hide them but we heard nevertheless. All of us, even dad, took turns in comforting him. We once came in with the 3 three of us and he totally freaked out. He didn't like us coming at him all at once when he's like this. It would make him feel trapped, knowing we could overpower him when we were with more people.

"Give it time Don, I mean you didn't tell your brothers right away as well" I smiled slightly, knowing what she was referring to. Apart from my family only April and Mikey knew what happened to me in the past, some others knew about the scar or that I was adopted, and Casey knew it had something to do with my past. But I only told April and Mikey. And unlike my brothers, April never pitied me. She never treated me differently because of it.

I didn't want that. When my brothers found out about my panic attacks at first they changed, they started acting really nice and making me breakfast and that kind of stuff. That's what I hated, I didn't want to be pitied, I just wanted them to know. When I told April she didn't brush it off or anything, she said she was sorry that this had happened and we spent the rest of our time talking but she never pitied me, she still looked at me the same way as before, just like I wanted her to.

I just wanted Mikey to realize it as well, that we wouldn't look at him differently once we told him.

TMNT

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He never told us. Months passed but he never told us. And Mikey grew to have two faces. As months progressed he started to open up more. He started pranking us, laughing and just enjoying life. But at the same time he was trapped. Every time someone would mention Carl or his past he would completely turn around. His smile would fade and the mysterious twinkle in his eyes would immediately die down.

At times he would be Mikey, the happy kid who was laughing every second of the day and they boy who enjoyed having us around. The happy little brother Don never had. Another little brother for me and Leo, but once someone would mention a tiny bit he would close himself, shield himself from us. He would just.. shut down completely, avoiding us at any cost.

The news around Yue eventually died down but it took 2 months for her to fully disappear from the news. She was famous, even if she didn't want to be famous. She was the only known survivor, the only one to escape from Carl, and now she had killed herself. The purple dragons did everything they could to keep her on the news, raise awareness for both Carl and Mikey but of course the police couldn't do anything about it, but that wouldn't stop them from picking on Mikey at school.

Slowly months passed and Mikey stayed with us for another month before going back to his own house. His dad had called him a month after the incident with the purple dragons. We didn't hear anything of the conversation but we could see what it did to Mikey. His face drained off all the color and he fell down on the couch, his legs buckling beneath him. Anger was clearly present in his eyes but he didn't complain, he just agreed. A single tear sliding down his cheek.

We didn't know what he agreed to at the moment but the next day we understood. He had packed the little stuff he had here at our house and told us he was leaving. He didn't want to leave, that wasn't a secret, and we didn't want him to leave either but he said he had no choice. His dad wanted him home because he was leaving the city for a few days and Mikey had to be home. We didn't know the exact reason but Mikey did say something about his mother.

The house was quiet without him, it seemed hollow but as months progressed we got used to it again, we lived like this for 16 years after all. Mikey kept visiting us but it was less than we remembered. Mikey grew more quiet, both at school and our home. And we all knew what was going on, he was relapsing at his own house but there was nothing we could do. Carl was his 'father' after all, dad couldn't go against Carl, and neither could Mikey. Not like he would dare to do so.

Right now it was the beginning of December, 4 months since we met Mikey. The teen was still living with his 'family' and skipped school more frequently. A couple of weeks back we discovered that school had allowed him to do so because of his condition, he was allowed to skip school without question. But he never misused it like this, and we all knew something was wrong at Mikey's house.

He would sometimes skip two or three days in a row, just like today. It Friday already and Mikey hadn't been to school for 2 days now. He didn't respond to our messages and didn't come to our house like he'd always do. All three of us were getting worried, but we knew we couldn't do anything. Until know.

I didn't even know why but I could feel my heart beating in my chest right now. The house, it was a normal house but somehow it looked really creepy. The houses around Mikey's house were either abandoned or put up for sale. Leo and Don didn't know about it, but Casey had told me that Carl would be leaving the city today, which meant he wasn't at home. I skipped school today to visit Mikey.

I took a deep breath and walked over to the door, ringing the bell. There was a sharp ringing sound, indicating the bell worked and I stepped back slightly. I trusted Casey but I still couldn't help but wonder what'd happen if Carl suddenly opened the door, or what has happened to Mikey in these days. I shouldn't be worrying, Casey wouldn't lie and Mikey skipped days frequently and seemed to be fine.

"Raph, what are you doing here?" Mikey's low voice sounded when the door was finally opened after a few minutes. My eyes widen slightly at the sight. Mikey's face was dangerously pale and he was hiding his body behind the open door but even from here I could see his swollen, bruising arms and his red shoulder.

"I came to check on ya, you haven't been at school lately" I say, doing a step forwards. Mikey doesn't move at first, staring at me with a shocked expression before sighing in defeat and turning around. I wince slightly, his movements are very sore and he keeps his arms along his side, like it was too painful to move them.

"What happened to ya Mike?" I eventually ask, walking inside the house and closing the door behind me. Mikey hisses in pain slightly as he sits down, putting an icepack on his shoulder with another pained hiss. I frown slightly, so that's where that red spot came from. I quickly walk over to him and take over the ice, allowing him to drop his arms again.

"I fell" He mumbled but I could clearly see through his lie. I snort slightly.

"Sure and I'm the Easter bunny. Don't use that bullshit on me Mikey. Fine if you don't want to tell but stop lying ta us" I snort, looking over to him. The boy deliberately avoids my eyes and he casts them downwards.

"You want to know what happened?" Mikey eventually whispered, but it wasn't a question, it was a statement. "Fine, my dad punched me again. Happy now? I said it, dad hit me again" He suddenly lashes out, completely surprising me. He seems angry, throwing his hands in the air. Only to lower them again with a low hiss.

I curse inwards. He was doing it again. Acting like it didn't matter anymore. The only reason he told us about Carl and what happened in the past. It was because he thought it didn't matter anymore, and right now he had the same thought. And no, it wasn't okay. I wanted to know what happened to him, but I didn't want him to tell it like this.

"No Mikey, of course I'm not. He isn't supposed to hit you. A dad should…" I start, trying to comfort him in any way, not like I was good at comforting people but Mikey angrily cut me off.

"I know that Raphael, I fucking know that but I can't change it okay? Just go, I don't want to talk right now" He grumbles, standing up with sore movements. The icepack falls off his shoulder and he leaves the room. Kid thinks I'll leave, no way. I'm here right now and I'm not leaving him. Not when he's acting so strange.

I slowly stand up, cautious not to make too much sound and follow outside the room. The following room only contained a stair so without any hesitation I walk up the stairs, coming at the first floor. It isn't very big but there are multiple rooms. One of the rooms is open though and I could hear Mikey speaking.

"Why do you keep doing it mom?" he says angrily but I could hear worry lacing in his voice. I slowly step into the room and let out a gasp when I see the two persons in the room. "Raph what the fuck are you doing here?!" Mikey suddenly yells, jumping up with a loud yell. But I didn't pay attention to him.

The room was simple, a double bed standing in the corner of the room. Bottles were sprawled everywhere, liquid dripping on the floor, needles scattered all around and on the other side of the room was Mikey, huddled over a sleeping woman. She looked awful. He face was even paler than Mikey's face. Her eyes almost inflamed and circled red. She was wearing messy and worn clothes. There was an awful smell around the room and she was surrounded by bottles and a needle.

"Is that yer mom?" I ask, blinking slightly. An alcoholic, the woman on the floor was clearly an alcoholic, an addict. If the bottles and the needles weren't enough evidence already. The woman herself was clearly drunk, even while passed out I could smell the alcohol and vomit around the room. Mikey's grimaces slightly and grabs the arms of the woman, attempting to lift her up.

"Yes she is" he grunts angrily, groaning in pain and dropping her mother again. He closes his eyes for a moment, rubbing his sore shoulder and his face crunching up with pain. A sting of guilt washes over me and before I even know it I'm next to Mikey's mother, easily hovering her up. I blink with confusion, almost dropping her in surprise. She was very light, almost too light and I had no problem picking her up. And as I laid her down on the bed I could see how thin she actually was.

The flesh around her cheeks were practically sucked inwards and you could see the bones of her arms, her ribs through her sleeveless shirt, she had no spare meat at all. She was in one word unhealthy. If it wasn't for the short blond hair and the faint freckles around her nose I wouldn't have believed Mikey about this being his mother.

"Is she an addict?" I suddenly ask, taking a few steps back as Mikey tugs her mother in. It's a strange sight really. A boy tucking in his mother while the mother is obviously drunk and completely out of it. His eyes are full of worry as he helps his mother. It just ain't right. His mother should be doing this to Mikey, not the other way around. He winces slightly at my question but keeps his face downwards.

"Yes she is" He says, looking up to me. "Seeing all those little kids getting hurt makes people do these kind of things" He snaps. My eyes widen slightly, realization dawning onto me. He couldn't be serious with this one. I've heard what happened to Casey's little sister, and those things were horrible. I can't imagine how that must be like, seeing you husband doing all that stuff to little kids.

It will make you grab a bottle of wine, or whiskey, it makes you take drugs, even if it's totally wrong. Seeing those children does things to you, and I now know that Mikey's mom had seen them, and I know Mikey has seen them as well. I slowly walk over to him, grabbing his arms and turning them around, displaying the few tiny puncture marks that were on his right arm. He growls and he rips his arm away.

"I'm not addicted" He snaps, ripping his arm from my grasp and ignoring the obvious pain it caused him. He groans with frustration and pushes me away, walking towards the door.

"I didn't say anything Mikey" I retorted, snatching his wrist before he could leave the room, pulling him back in. "Are ya on drugs right now?" I ask, my eyes narrowing dangerously. He glares back at me, surprising me slightly. He never acts like this.

"No I'm not Raph! I would be puking my guts out and sleeping on the floor if I was" He snaps and I cringe slightly. The fact that Mikey used drugs really scared me, not to mention the drunken mother that was now sleeping on the bed. This whole situation was just messed up. I only came to check on him and it quickly turned into… _this._

"Just go home Raph" He said, before pushing me away.

TMNT

* * *

I still didn't know why I listened to him. Kid was definitely not in his right mind. I checked him though, there was no sign of alcohol and his eyes were normal which meant he really wasn't on drugs either. And I honestly shouldn't have been worried, wait skip that. I should be. His condition was bad. He was using drugs, he was injecting himself with god knows what. He told me he wasn't addicted but I don't believe him, even though I couldn't detect any sign that he was lying.

Mikey isn't a good liar, we could always see right through him but right now I couldn't. Maybe he was telling the truth and maybe he was believing the lie himself. Maybe he truly thought he was in control here, and not the drug. Either way, I shouldn't have left him. With a drunken and addicted mom I might add.

But it wasn't until Mikey called me that I truly regretted my actions. It was just after my brothers got home from school, just a little over 2 o'clock. The teen on the other side wasn't speaking yet but I wasn't really worried at first, just putting the phone on the speaker so Leo and Don could follow the conversation as well. The moment the speaker was on we could hear gasps from the other line, and eventually a shaky voice.

"R-R-Raph..ie" He hiccupped, his breaths coming out with pained gasps.

He only told us to come to the park, and to hurry up before there was a loud thud. The connection was never broken but no matter how much we yelled at the phone, Mikey never answered. We were immediately moving to the park, trying to get there as fast as possible. And when we eventually arrived we were horrified by the sight.

The phone had fallen to the ground. Blood was on Mikey's hands and on the white shirt he was wearing, the same he was wearing just hours ago when I visited him. Tears were streaming down his face and his shoulders were slumped in defeat. When I sat down next to him, he immediately turned to me, burying his face into my chest and crying his heart out. He only said one thing, but that was enough for me to understand.

"He has ApriI"


	13. Chapter 13

My world seemed to crumble right then and there. Those three words, enough to bring me to my knees. My fingers were digging into the sand beneath me, he has April. Even if Mikey never told me who 'he' was, I knew who it was. Carl, April was in Carl's clutches. It couldn't be, she couldn't be. There haven't been any abduction for 10 whole months. Everything we tried to accomplish in these last months.

We tried so hard to fix Mikey, help him overcome the memories he was carrying around, the memories of hurting those girls, seeing them getting hurt. We helped him with his nightmares, assured him he'd never have to go through something again, and we failed. Only with those three words I knew we had failed. And now April was the victim. In one moment we failed both Mikey and April.

"Mikey, talk to me" Raph whispers, acting surprisingly soft, tipping the boy's chin up so he was forced to look at Raph's face. Bright blue eyes were clouded with pain and trying to avoid any eye contact. My vision fades slightly as tears appear in my eyes, I don't even bother to wipe them away. I let them go, my tears streaming down my face. Tears for April, for Mikey, for everyone who is the victim of Carl's actions.

"Leave him Raph" Leo softly says but not meant as an offensive comment or anything. He gently wrapped an arm around Mikey's shoulders and helps him up. The blond teen is completely out of it and doesn't react, only casts his eyes downwards and Leo leads him to the small water stream just a few meters ahead.

Leo guides Mikey's hand into the stream, instantly washing away all the blood that was on his hands. My form stiffens slightly as someone wraps an arm around me but I could only concentrate on the blood that was now being washed away by the current, before completely dissolving in the water. The only evidence of April that was still on him was the bloodstained t-shirt.

"Let's get him home first"

Leo eventually says as all the blood is washed off of his hands. Still Mikey doesn't react at all. His eyes are still casted downwards, his eyes foggy and tears silently streaming down his face. And I'm here, crying because Carl took April, I can't even imagine what Mikey must be going through right now. Carl is his dad, his father. He worked with him, he hurt April. I can tell from the blood on his hands. And I don't even know if I should be angry or saddened by the blood.

I feel anger towards the one who hurt April but no matter how much I try, I can't seem to hate Mikey, I just can't. Maybe it's because I know he's the victim as well, Carl hurt April, not MIkey. He abducted her, not Mikey. Two strong arms wrap around my form, and only then I notice I'm shaking. Tremors are wracking through my body, red flashing through my mind.

"Don't look at it Don, you'll be okay"

Raph's voice is surprisingly gentle and it confuses me for a few seconds. He's my brother, and I know him. He always acts tough but I know he cares about us, all of us. He only shows that side when one of us is injured, sick or upset. And then it hits me, my shaking body, the tears streaming down my face. It wasn't because of April, not entirely. The blood.

_"You screwed up our lives"_

A soft whimper escapes my lips as those cursed words ring through my head again. Raph tightens his arms around my body, pressing me closer to his chest. I can feel his heart beating against my ears. A steady and yet accelerated beating. I know mine is skyrocketing right now but I don't care, I only listen to my big brother's heartbeat.

"Ya can beat them Don. Yer better than those assholes" Raph whispered in my ear, stroking some of my hair out of my face. And despite my trembling body I snort slightly, a faint smile spreading on my face. Taking a deep breath, I lifted my head from Raph's hold and look around nervously. Leo had taken off his jacket and had folded it around Mikey, covering the peck of blood that was on his white shirt.

My eyes trailed towards the form of my oldest brother, even though he was doing a great job at hiding it I could see that he was quickly getting cold. It wasn't snowing just yet, but they predicted some snow later this evening. And while it wasn't snowing just yet, it was already getting really cold and Leo had just given his jacket to Mikey.

"I'm good"

My voice is still a bit shaky but it was enough for Raph. He nudges me playfully and helps me with getting on my feet. All four of us are quiet while we walk back home, no words being exchanged between the four of us. Raph however was calling dad right now, asking him to come home. He was talking in Japanese, discussing things about what happened to Mikey, and it was obvious it was something the blond teen wasn't allowed to hear, or wouldn't be able to handle.

I sighed softly, earning a dubious glance from my immediate older brother but I ignored him. April was in danger right now, and whatever Mikey was protecting or whatever the reason was that Mikey wasn't telling the police, he had to give that up if he wanted to save April.

TMNT

When we came back home the first thing we noticed was the black car parked in front of our house, and the second thing we noticed was the man talking to dad once we got into the house. He was wearing a grey suit with an equally gray head, matching his grey hair. He didn't look very old though, probably somewhere in his forties. When we walked in him and Master Splinter immediately turned towards us.

"My sons" Dad breathed out, scanning all three of us before trailing towards Mikey. The teen had stopped trembling, but along with stopping that particular action he stopped doing anything. He was like a lifeless doll. He allowed Leo to guide him everywhere. He never complained, never uttered a single word and never looked, his eyes kept casted downwards.

Obvious worry crossed dad's eyes, he may not be Mikey's father but he cared for him over the last month. He cooked for him, put him to bed when he had fallen asleep on the couch, and held him while he cried. And even despite the bond we shared, Mikey told father something that we didn't know, and that he didn't want to share with us.

"Father, who is this?" Leo cautiously asked, not trying to sound offensive in any way. The man chuckled slightly, clearly not offended in any way, and did a step forwards, extending his hand. Leo tensed slightly but it was hardly visible and he did a step forwards, accepting the hand of the strange man.

"I'm Kurtzman, Jack Kurtzman. I'm a good friend of your father" He introduces himself and some of the tension seems to leave Leo's body.

"I'm Leonardo, Leo" He eventually says and disconnects himself from Kurtzman's grip. "These are my brothers. Raph, Donnie. And that's Mikey…..Excuse us" He introduces himself before turning to Mikey, taking his arm gently and leading him outside the living room. The freckled teen immediately obeys and follows Leo without question. He's really out of it, because of everything that is going on right now.

His steps are almost robotic, and the only thing that keeps him moving is the fact that Leo is dragging him along right now. My eyes are glued to him until they disappear, walking up the stairs and only then I seem to be able to look back at the stranger who just introduced himself. Yet, it's odd that he's standing there, I expected the police, the FBI.

"Dad I don't understand.. Why isn't the police here? April's in danger.." I say, looking directly at my father. I didn't understand. He would call the police, I heard him on the phone. We needed to call the police, April was abducted by Carl, she was in danger. I didn't understand why he would only call Kurtzman.

"I'm afraid I cannot tell you that just yet my son. Kurtzman and I need to discuss something very important." He says in a calm voice as Raph leads me to the couch, forcing me to sit down. I want to feel angry right now, I really do but I just can't. I can see worry lacing in my father's eyes. He's really worried. He rarely shows his worry to us, not wanting us to worry as well but right his worry is clearly present.

I want to be angry at him for not calling the cops but the worry made me rethink. He was worried as well, he knew that April was gone, Raph told him. He knew what Mikey just had to do. There had to be a good reason, I wasn't sure what is was but I trusted dad.

Raph and I both fell silent after those words, and dad and Kurtzman left without saying another word as well. I was too confused to say anything. I didn't understand what was going on right now, my mind refused to process everything that was going on, leaving me with a dull headache. One moment we were worrying, worry for Mikey because he hadn't been at school. Worry for Raph because he had skipped school.

And the next thing we knew was Raph being at home, a distant and worried look on his face. He refused to tell anything, where he had been, what happened and so on. And not even 10 minutes Raph's phone rang. And before knew it I was digging into the sand, my mind spinning. April had been taken, Carl had abducted once again, Mikey was forced to hurt someone once again. It was happening again. And right now this happened.

Dad refusing to call the police because they had to discuss something. I knew it was important, I trusted dad but at the same time I wanted to grab my phone, call the police and rescue April. But I was too numb to do anything, I could only sit still and lay still in the embrace of my older brother, waiting for someone to do something, anything.

TMNT

None of us were very happy with the idea of letting Mikey lead the way but it was the only option, the only way to find April. I was worried for him, he wasn't shaking or showing any fear, but he wasn't showing us anything. His face was just as blank as it was before Leo took him upstairs. And it worried me, it was like he wasn't even there anymore.

It would be a bad idea bringing him back there, I knew it was but he agreed to do it, saving April. My heart was beating in my chest, I didn't even know if I wanted to see April right now, I saw the blood already. I knew she was wounded, I knew Mikey hurt her already. I had no idea what Carl did to her in the meantime. If she was still alive, if she would ever be okay. I didn't even know when she was abducted.

"Don, no offense but I think you should wait outside… there will probably be blood"

I jumped slightly when a sudden hand was placed on my shoulder, making me tense immensely. I whipped my head around and froze when I looked right into the sea blue eyes of my older brother, immediately relaxing afterwards.

"Don't scare me like that Leo" I scolded playfully. "And none taken, I know what you mean." I assure him, I knew I couldn't face the blood. I knew I was being cowardly but every damn time I saw the red liquid I remembered again. It got better lately, but the memories still came back when I saw the blood and I wanted to avoid it whenever I could.

Leo gave me a short nod before looking ahead again. In front of the group were Mikey and Raph. Mikey had to lead the way but he didn't want to be alone right now so Raph stayed with him. Behind him were 3 agents, guns, tasers and handcuffs around their belts. I just hoped they didn't have to use the first 2. I just hoped everything would go well, and we would be able to get April out of there, alive and unharmed. But I already knew it was going to be hard, and the last part was already impossible.

"Here it is" Mikey said in a low voice, stopping in front of a wall that was overrun with plants. I was about to open my mouth until Mikey gently brushed some of the plants aside, revealing an almost impossible to see door. It was painted the same shade as the wall and it blended in perfectly once you put the plants back in front of the door. And op top of that it was away from the road, in fact we had to walk the last meters towards this place. No one ever came here unless you knew what was over here.

The three agents immediately drew their guns but made no effort to walk towards the door. It was an agreement none of us were happy about. Carl's dad would surely be here, Mikey said that he would be, and if three agents would be storming inside the room, April could be harmed in a last self-defense. He wouldn't expect it when Mikey would first come into the room.

And that worried me. Sure it was 5 against 1 but some of them could get hurt. Though I understood why they did it. We couldn't bring too many people, A the room was way too small for so many soldiers, and B we would alert the people around and that would blow our surprise. There would be an ambulance waiting for April, and one of the doctors was just behind us.

"_Ganbattene"_ Raph said, allowing his hand to leave Mikey's shoulder. Mikey may not be able to speak Japanese, but he knew a few phrases, _good luck_ being one of them. The freckled teen smiled slightly at the comment before his face hardened again. A last glance was casted our side before he opened the door and went inside. Now all we could do was wait.

TMNT

I hated waiting, I hated not being able to do anything at all. I hated knowing that the ones I cared about were in danger right now, and all we did was sitting here. At least they expected me to sit, I was too anxious to sit down, constantly pacing and my hands near my sais just in case. Waiting, waiting for a goddamn signal to tell us it was time already.

I would've punched Mikey any other day, suggesting to go alone into that hellhole, giving him 10 minutes before we could enter, I would've hit him any other day. But I knew that Carl trusted Mikey, no skip that. I snorted slightly at my own thought. Carl didn't trust Mikey, he knew that Mikey wouldn't betray him. There was something that stopped Mikey from betraying his own father. Carl had never been so wrong.

It felt like 2 hours before the police finally signaled us to come along. Leo nodded to me but didn't budge. I understood why he did it, Donnie couldn't come down because April was obviously hurt in some way, and being hurt meant she was bleeding. Leo couldn't stand leaving Donnie alone with a stranger over here, and with the agents I would be fine on my own.

All three agents had guns in their hands, ready to shoot whenever necessary and my hands were already near my sais just in case. I didn't want to use them. Trust me, I had no problem with stabbing Carl, that asshole deserved everything but I didn't want it to get out of hand so soon. I just wanted Carl to be arrested and April to be safe.

The room inside the door was almost completely dark and immediately led to a staircase. The ones you had in castles, those spiral staircases made of stone. I had to suppress a shudder, can't say it wasn't creepy cause it totally was. And right now I was so happy that I didn't have any form of claustrophobia or anything because the room was so small.

We continued to walk down the stairs, trying to keep our steps as silent as possible so Carl wouldn't hear us coming. The stairs weren't very long, for which I was grateful and when we reached the bottom my fingers wrapped themselves around he handle of my sais, ready for an attack.

"Carl Buford, hands in the air NOW!" One of the policemen suddenly yelled, drawing his gun. And there he was, Mikey's dad, Carl Buford, the man responsible for kidnapping all those children. His blue eyes were widened with disbelief and a flicker of anger was present as well. I tried looking past the man, looking for April and Mikey but he was blocking the entrance.

Carl's black hair was spoiled with dust and I mentally cursed at seeing those blue eyes, one of the few things Mikey inherited from his father. But unlike Mikey's eyes these weren't filled with excitement or joy. These were filled with hatred, anger and clouded with pain. His eyes narrowed slightly before he suddenly dashed away.

I didn't cringe when the first shots were fired but immediately followed the men inside the room. I however didn't pay attention to Carl nor the police, my eyes scanned the room until they fell on two figures in the corner of the room. The room wasn't much, in fact it was barely anything. The walls were made of cement and in a lot of places the cement had fallen out, revealing the bricks beneath it.

The room wasn't even well-lit but enough to make everything visible. There were spider webs all over the place. And in the corner, her hands tied behind her back and on her knees was April. She was held in place by something attached to the wall. A blindfold was on top of her eyes and both sides of the blindfold was stained with blood. There was a gag in her mouth and next to her was Mikey.

He had tears running down his cheek and was holding a warm blanket around April's body. I immediately darted towards them, kneeling down next to them. Mikey looked up to me, sadness but yet relief present in his baby blue orbs. I gave him a short smile to assure him it was finally over but immediately turned towards April.

"April, April it's me Raph. We're gonna get ya out of here okay?" I said in fast pace, noticing how April suddenly started to tense when I neared her. I shot a quick glance to Carl and smirked slightly when I saw him getting restrained. I reached for the back of April's head and quickly undid the gag from her face. The second the gag fell off a sob escaped her mouth, followed by a soft whimper.

"Don't worry Ape, it's gonna be okay. He ain't gonna hurt ya anymore" I tried to assure her as I reached for the blindfold, but a quick glance at the dried blood made me rethink, and my stomach turned violently. "I think the blindfold is stuck to yer face Ape. I can't take it off just yet" I said with a heavy heart. The blood was already long clotted and had probably fused with the fabric of the blindfold. If I were to remove it now it would reopen the wound again.

I knew about eyebrow wounds, Leo once got hit with Don's bo staff during practice. There was so much blood, and it looked really bad but dad assured us it wasn't. Of course Leo was still bleeding badly but eyebrows always bled this badly, and we didn't have to worry. And after all this time you rarely saw it, unless you knew where to look. If I would reopen the wound right now, more blood would spill from April and that was the last thing I wanted.

"Is he gone? Where is he…? Raph… please get these things off" April said, her voice shaking as she rattled her chains slightly. I immediately reached for her chains, and with the help of Mikey we took the chains off her wrists. Once they were gone April immediately fell forwards and I could barely catch her before she hit the ground.

"He's gone Ape, yer safe" I immediately assured her, hearing the fear lacing in her voice. Another sob left her mouth but she nodded nevertheless. "April, there is a cop here, he's one of the good guys, he'll carry you outside okay?" I cautiously asked, eying at the approaching cop. The other two were still holding Carl down, his hands were behind his back and cuffs around his wrists.

April nodded, not uttering a single word and the policemen carefully picked her up bridal style. The guy was pretty tall and obviously strong so he had no problem picking April up. I felt bad for leaving April in the hands of someone she didn't know but Leo and Don were upstairs, and I had to stay here for Mikey. I wanted to say something but the problem was, I had no idea what.

It was finally over, Carl was arrested, April was finally safe and Mikey was free. He wouldn't have to abduct anyone ever again. I sighed slightly and wrapped my arm around Mikey's body, hauling him up. Mikey swayed on his face and heavily leaned against me with fresh tears streaming down his face. I tightened my grip slightly and started to move towards the staircase when a voice interrupted me.

"You've made a huge mistake boy, she will pay. You killed her!" Carl hissed, looking up to his son. That was the only thing he could say before his face was pressed against the sand again but it was already too late. Mikey choked on a sob before fully leaning against and losing his footing. A satisfying snicker came from Carl but I ignored it. I grunted slightly and with some effort managed to get Mikey's arm across my shoulder so I could help him walk.

Giving Carl a last glare I finally fully turned around and began walking up the stairs. Mikey was still conscious but just barely. I could see his eyes dropping and his breathing was getting more labored and more often. I cursed inwards, kid was hyperventilating_ shit_. I grumbled slightly and forced my legs to walk faster, until I eventually reached the blinding light above.

I barely even recognized it. There was chaos all around. More policemen had joined my brothers, there were several doctors in white coats walking around and in the middle was a makeshift bench with April on top of it. Leo had his arms wrapped around April's shaking body as a female nurse was carefully checking her for any life-threatening wounds probably.

And the moment we came out of the door we were jumped by multiple doctors, asking us several question like if we were hurt, if we were okay and so on. I shrugged them off, Mikey needed the help right now. But before I could even say that an oxygen mask was placed on top of Mikey's mouth, allowing him to breathe a bit easier.

"We gotta get these two to the hospital." A voice sounded through the field.

One of the doctors placed a hand on my back to guide me to the ambulance that was standing near the road, I could see the lights flickering through the trees. I stopped for a second to lift Mikey up bridal style, finally out of those tight staircases. The teen in my hold curled tightly against me, crying even harder as we neared the ambulance.

"I'm sorry mom, Rae. I'm so sorry" Was the last thing he cried before he fainted.

**TMNT**

**April's safe, Mikey's sorta okay.. and Carl is finally arrested… **

**April's wounds were actually inspired from this girl. While we were playing hockey one of my teammates accidently shot the ball and it hit her eyebrow. She was literally dripping blood onto the field. But it wasn't that bad, head wounds just bleed a lot.**

**Sorry for the slow update :/**

**See ya! **


	14. Chapter 14

You know those moments when you have this horrible feeling of déjà vu? Well that was exactly how I was feeling right now. We were back at the hospital again, back in the same room where Mikey had been just months ago when he was attacked by the purple dragons, when Yue had killed herself and they busted Mikey's ribs. The moment when Mikey finally trusted us enough to tell what was going on.

Or he just didn't care anymore.

But yet, it was different this time. Mikey wasn't injured, so he wasn't in his bed. Instead he had a blanket wrapped tightly around his body and he was sitting on a chair in front of the large window, mindlessly staring outside and watching the playfield below. At first a few lone tears would seep through his eyes, but as the hours progressed his face hardened, not allowing us to see what was going on in his head.

Currently Raph was outside the room with a phone pressed against his ear and Don was with April. She was pretty distressed and refused to let me go as she was taken to the hospital, I had to stay with her while the doctors carefully washed away her blindfold because it was still glued to her skin from her own blood. It looked really bad, I can't lie, but after the blood has been washed away, and they stitched the skin it didn't look as bad as before.

Still, despite having her wounds treated, she was still very distressed. No one blamed her, she had been abducted by Carl, the one who was known for raping and torturing children. I just held her close while she slowly calmed down, but not without the help of a small sedative she agreed to take. Eventually Don came into the room and I allowed the two to have some privacy.

And right now all I could do was wait for something, and I didn't even know what to wait for.

"They got his mother out but she was on too many drugs to be responsive." Raph suddenly announces as he walks into the room again, eyeing carefully at Mikey as if he was expecting a reaction from the news, but as expected there wasn't even a tiny one. He was still unresponsive and staring out of window. When Raph noticed it he sighed softly and sat down on the hospital bed, putting away his phone.

I silently walked over to my younger twin, sitting down next to him on the bed in a cross-legged position. From the corner of my eye I could see Raph looking at Mikey back, gnawing his lip slightly. He was worrying, I could see he was, and I could also see there was something he was keeping from me by the way he avoided me.

_"He apologized to his mom before he passed out, and to another person" _

My head immediately shot to the left as Raph's voice suddenly penetrated the suffocating silence around the room, and what surprised me the most was the fact he spoke Japanese. Though a quick glance towards the blond teen answered the question already.

"Who?" I ask, speaking Japanese as well. Raph sighed again, looking over to me briefly before shaking his head as an indication he doesn't know _who_ Mikey was referring to. There is another silence for a while until Mikey's shoulders suddenly slump even more, breaking the contact with the glass and casting his eyes downwards.

Immediately Raph eyes towards me but I ignore him, slowly walking over to Mikey's chair, kneeling besides it.

"You okay?" I whisper, not really knowing what I wanted to ask but knowing this was a stupid question. Of course he wasn't okay, for crying out loud he had to hurt April, he had to cut her. And the fact that he was apologizing to his mom and another unknown person wasn't predicting anything good. So I wasn't surprised to see Mikey shake his head lightly, never even looking at me.

"I killed her"

Mikey's voice was nothing more than a pathetic croak, his throat dry from dehydration and I winced slightly, it hurt me to see Mikey so depressed. We tried so hard these past few months to get him to smile again, and it worked to a certain level. And right now it was like all that work had been washed down the drain.

"Who did you kill Mikey? What do you mean?" I ask in a soft voice, knowing pressing him wouldn't do anything good. He opens his mouth, and for a second I have the illusion he will grant me the answers I desperately want, but of course luck isn't at my side today.

"It doesn't matter, she's already dead"

I closed my eyes, letting my head drop slightly. Even after everything we've been through, he still doesn't want to tell us what's bothering us. And yet, none of us can blame him for anything. He was abused from the age of 8. His father was violent, he was forced to hurt and kill children from the age of 10. He watched them die right in front of him.

He was damaged, and he used to keep everything inside of him, of course he wouldn't tell us everything while he is used to hide everything from the outer world.

Who would've guessed that we would be in this situation? A year ago we were still back in Japan. Just living with the four of us. Raph, Don, dad and me. None of us would've guessed that another member would be added to our family, not officially but all of us looked at Mikey like a little brother, the youngest son.

I hated what Mikey had been forced to go through. When he was with us, we saw glimpses of the real Mikey, the laughing and carefree Mikey. But that was only because he wasn't thinking about reality, because we made him forget the bad things that happened in his life. The sad thing was that those moments never lasted, and they weren't often.

Of course Mikey smiled a lot when he was with us, but there was always something holding him back. There were a few, precious, moments where he truly forgot and he was truly happy with us. He would need a lot of help once Carl was safely locked away. But just with Donnie, all of us were prepared to do so in order to help our little brother.

Speaking of little brothers…

The moment I stood up, figuring Mikey needed some alone time right now, I saw Donnie walking into the room. A defeated yet relieved look on his face. At first I wanted to ask how April was doing, but I found myself unable to say anything as he walked over to me, carefully wrapping his arms around my neck. It wasn't a really desperate hug, but I could sense this was something he needed right now so I returned the hug.

"April's okay, her dad is with her right now"

Donnie's voice was muffled in my shoulder and I let out a huff of laughter, softly pulling him out of the hug and giving him a change to keep the hug going if he wanted. But while we were really close, none of us were really into the hugs. Though when we needed it, none of us would hesitate to give one. My little brother smiled as well, scratching the back of his neck slightly.

"They say April will be okay, she's only been there for a day. But she won't forget this"

I finally released a breath I didn't know I was holding, hearing that April would be okay was one of the best things I could possibly hear today. Apart from Mikey, April had been my first priority right now. She was our best friend, of course Don was the closest with her, but we all loved her to a point she was practically our non-sister sister. Of course I'd be worried about her, so hearing she was gonna be okay was a huge relief.

"I saw dad on my way here" Donnie suddenly states, making me frown in confusion slightly, immediately wondering why dad hasn't come up to see us. The last time we were in the hospital he practically denied police orders and ran into our room to see if we were okay, even if he knew we were already. This time it wasn't any different. We had called him, saying we were all okay, just like last time.

But this time he didn't come to see us.

"Kurtzman was with him, walking into another hospital room. He did see me, said he'd be with us soon but he was… different. There was something he didn't want to tell us" My little brother clarified, a light frown on his face. If there was one thing Don couldn't stand it was not knowing things, he hated when someone withheld information like this.

"There was screaming from the room Leo… a girl was screaming from the room dad went into" He suddenly adds with a whisper, finally looking at me again. "Why would he… I don't understand Leo…." I hated hearing and seeing Donnie so uncertain, I hated seeing all of my brothers seeing like that. I softly took his hand, leading him towards the bed.

It was clear he was physically exhausted and he drew his knees to his chest once he was seated on the bed, looking down at the floor. I cautiously sat down next to him, feeling Raph's eyes bore its way in my back. Even if Don was practically the one he once was, he was still feeling the old wounds of his past, he was still very uncertain.

And dad practically turning his back to Donnie would surely make him uncertain.

He was betrayed by his real parents, he needed someone to remind, he needed to be reminded that he was loved. When he was young it had to be given with actions and words but as he grew older just being there for him was enough to know we loved him.

"He loves you Don, and I'm sure he'll explain everything" I say, nudging him slightly. He looks at me and puts his head on my shoulder, sighing slightly.

"I know Leo… it's just so weird right now" He didn't even need to say or mention Mikey but I knew he was talking about the whole thing regarding him and his father. I lean into the touch, pressing my temple against his head.

"No I want to see him right now! You can't stop me!" A voice suddenly echoed through the large halls. Donnie immediately shot up, looking at the door. Neither of us knew the voice, but something in his eyes made me think otherwise. There was recognition. Before any of us could say something a girl, or rather woman, ran into the room.

I blinked slightly, completely ignoring dad and Kurtzman running into the room behind her, I could only focus my eyes on her. She was older than we were, definitely. She was probably around 20 years old. She had a soft and smooth face. She was wearing a simple shirt, and a tight bandage wrapped around her right shoulder.

She had scrapes all over her bare arms and dirt on her face. She had light freckles on the bridge of her nose as baby blue eyes that swiftly darted through the room, panic and relief mixing in a strange combination. It was a perfect match, it was like a female version of Mikey was standing in front of him.

And then her eyes landed on Mikey's eyes, who had turned around in his chair at the sound of the girl's shouts.

"Mikey" She softly breathed out, her voice light but filled with sorrow. Nobody dared to move as she slowly took a step forwards, followed by another step. I watched her closely as she slowly made her way over to Mikey, none of us stopping her. Mikey was now standing, disbelieve in his blue orbs as he looked at the approaching figure, and before he could do anything, she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him close to her chest.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you…" She mumbled, planting a kiss against his hair as Mikey burrowed himself tightly in her embrace. "little brother"

TMNT

"Would someone just explain ta me what the hell is going on?" My younger twin brother eventually snapped, throwing his arms in the air to illustrate his frustration. Currently we were all seated around the medical room. The girl that had come in a little over 10 minutes ago was sitting on the bed with Mikey leaning on her shoulder.

Dried tears were on Mikey's cheeks but he was happily leaning against his sister's shoulder. Though the feeling wasn't fully truthful, you could see sadness in his eyes as well, and in his defeated gesture. His sister had her left arm wrapped around Mikey and a nurse had already treated and bandaged the wound on her shoulder, a bullet wound.

But none of us knew what was going on, she claimed to be Mikey's big sister but he never told us about any siblings. We always thought he was a single child. But apparently that wasn't the case, which brought up more question, where has she been all this time? And how did she get these wounds?

"I guess I should explain some things" The girl stated in a soft but confident voice. She shifted slightly and reached for the glass of water on the bed stand. I winced slightly as her fingers curled around the glass, once again being confronted by her disfigured hand. Her pinky was missing, and the top section of her ring finger has been removed as well.

She slowly took a sip of the water before putting it back in the rightful place, ignoring the stares we were giving her.

"Okay I guess you pretty much figured it out already, but yes, Mikey is my little brother. I'm his older sister Charly, Charly with an Y" She told us gently, confirming my theory. She really was Mikey's sister but then again, why didn't Mikey ever mention her?

"Why Charly with an Y? And no offense, but isn't Charly a boy's name..?" I ask, rubbing my neck awkwardly because I really didn't want to offend her. Tension left my body as Charly softly started to laugh, putting her disfigured hand on her mouth to stifle the laugh. The laugh wasn't long however as she settled again, nodding before she opened her mouth.

"Charly isn't my real name, and no worries, you're not being offensive in any way Leo" She told me quickly. "You know I'm Mikey's sister.. so that means Carl is my dad. I was originally named Carly, but after he hurt me, and I found out what kind of person he really was I refused to be called Carly, 'cause it was so similar to Carl. So I added an H because it was easier to explain to teachers because I could just tell they made a small spelling mistake or something" Charly explained.

I nodded, indicating I understood her reasoning. It happened quite often, children being named after their father or mother, or even their grandparents. Carl, Carly. He had wanted to give her a name that would remind her of him forever, and once Charly found out what Carl could really do, she wanted to get rid of the name that reminded her of him so badly.

But of course her dad wouldn't do that, wouldn't give her that opportunity, so she changed her name to something she could explain. Carly, Charly, it was so family, yet a totally different name. And it made sense, forgetting a Y in someone's name, it wasn't a big deal. And it wouldn't raise any unnecessary questions. Even Raph's name was misspelled countless times, so we were all familiar with it.

"At first dad wanted to use me as his next.. well as his successor." She said with a serious expression until a short huff of laughter escaped her throat. "I was too stubborn though, heck I even changed my name when I was just 5 years old. From that moment he knew I wasn't going to cooperate and he .. made Mikey" She stated drily, but what other choice did she have?

From the sound of it, that was just how it went. Charly didn't want to cooperate, she had the guts to stand up against her father. And that was probably the only reason Mikey was born, because Carl needed, or rather wanted, a successor. Someone who would help him with his sick games and someone who he could manipulate until they were too afraid to resist.

"I could never forgive myself from defying him, because of that decision, Mikey had to pay." She softly said, pressing her little brother a bit closer to herself.

"You know I never blamed you, I'm glad he didn't turn to you or Maya" He said, equally as soft. The moment the last name slipped from Mikey's lips he closed his eyes, squeezing a lonely tear through his closed lids. The sudden sadness seemed to apply to Charly, as her face dropped with sadness as well. But unlike Mikey she didn't close her eyes, instead she watched each one of us, first Donnie, then Raph and slowly towards me. Until I was staring in the same bright blue eyes both Mikey and Carl had.

"Maya was my younger sister, we were twins"

I wasn't even surprised by the news of a younger sister, the only thing I could focus on was that little word, the only word I needed to understand what had happened; _was_. She was her little sister, her twin sister like Raph was my little brother. Maya, Mikey's older sister, or she was. She _was_ their sister.

"She's gone isn't she?" I heard Donnie ask, but it wasn't much of a question, because from the look in his eyes I already knew he had figured it out. Mikey whimpered slightly as more tears slipped from his eyes but Charly wasn't crying and she nodded with sadness yet with confidence. It was weird, so weird seeing it. Mikey was breaking down because of everything, while Charly was clearly saddened as well but seemed to take it better.

"Right after Mikey freed Yue, dad just flipped and he beat him into unconsciousness for 11 days. During that time his house was searched but they found nothing. When he finally regained consciousness he grabbed him and Maya, forcing her them into the basement while leaving me locked in my bedroom." She started, eyeing at her little brother with concern.

"He tied Mikey to a pole left him alone, instead going towards Maya. He tied her hands behind her back and started beating her." Only now did a lone tear escape her eye, talking about the things the three of them had to go through. She quickly wiped it away, clearing her throat slightly.

"I heard the screams upstairs but I couldn't do anything about it, I watched the clock. 2 o'clock became 3 o clock, 3 o clock became 4 o clock, and only then did the screams die out. When I was taken to the basement as well, Maya was already dead. Dad wanted to punish Mikey for what he's done, traumatizing him enough that he wouldn't go to the police so he wouldn't get arrested"

And then I understood. I finally understood Mikey's reaction. Because _he_ set Yue free, Carl killed his sister, he killed Maya while he had to watch for hours. He was forced to watch as Carl beat the life out of his older sister, and the worst thing was that he had the illusion that it was his fault. I eyed at Charly, and then slowly to her hand. Charly seemed to notice me and opened her mouth again.

"He always hated Maya because she looked nothing like him. She was the only one without blue eyes, nor did she have blond hair. He didn't like me either, but that was because I refused to cooperate. So he had no problem killing us. He didn't beat me like Maya, instead he grabbed a knife and slowly started to cut my fingers" She explained, wiggling the remaining fingers slightly as if she was testing if they were still there.

I expected her to continue the story but she didn't. She slowly stood up from the bed, looking at Mikey. I frowned slightly until my eyes landed on Mikey as well. His eyes were closed and his breathing was low, and immediately I understood he was asleep. Charly wrapped Mikey's arms around her neck and had no trouble lifting him. She was muscular, not scary muscular but still very muscular for a girl from her age.

I walked up to her to help her and lifted the blanket so she could lay Mikey down. She flashed me a grateful smile and placed her little brother on the bed, tugging him in slightly before sitting down again. I did the same, sitting cross-legged on the bed, careful so I wouldn't sit on top of Mikey's legs and looked at her. She looked at me for a second before continuing the story like nothing had happened.

"He was begging me to stop, and it wasn't until Carl was cutting off the top section of my ring finger that the stopped. I remember being in so much pain that I couldn't hear what Mikey had screamed, but when Carl lifted his blade I could hear it, Mikey screaming again. He said that he would go to the police if there was no one left that he cared for. Of course he had mother, but Carl wouldn't risk it. That's the only reason I'm still alive right now"

"I wasn't killed, instead he hit me upside the head, causing me to fall unconscious. The next thing I knew was waking up in a medical bed in Baltimore. Carl was with me and we had a lovely talk. He had rented me an own apartment but there would be a man watching me whenever I went out of the house. And if I had even the slightest contact with Mikey, I would be killed. I didn't give a damn about my own life, but I couldn't leave him alone, so I didn't seek contact"

This was the first actual emotion I got from her; anger. Her fists were curling up and her face twisted with fury. It lasted only seconds though, and she remained silent after that. I didn't really pay attention to it, I could only rattle my brain to process the answers I finally had.

"So why didn't Mikey look for you? And why did he never mention you?"

It was Don who was the first to open his mouth, while the rest of us was still surprised by the answers we just got. Out of all the things I would've never thought this would be happening. I would've never guessed Mikey had another older sister, or used to have two.

"How could he? He knew I wasn't in New York anymore but apart from that… he knew nothing, and Carl wasn't dumb, I had to give up my family name so that wasn't an option either. As for mentioning you, I have no idea but I can guess"

As the last sentence left her mouth she lifted her shoulder, shrugging slightly, once again looking at each of us, studying us carefully. I shifted slightly, not comfortable at the stare but it seemed like Charly didn't even notice, or she ignored it.

"Judging from the way you treat him you're quite close" She started, looking at me for approval. I nodded bluntly, waiting for her to continue. "If he told you I was out there, would you have stopped looking? Even if you knew it was dangerous for both of us?"

This time I casted my look towards my younger twin, and one look already told me enough; no. The answer was no. If Mikey had told us about her, we would've looked for her because we would know how much Mikey was missing her, and that she was the only reason that was preventing Mikey from going to the police. I shake my head in a silent _no. _But I couldn't myself to press the subject, instead there was something I needed to know as well.

"Again, not be rude, but you seem to be taking this very well. I mean if Carl wanted you as your.. successor, he must've done things to do so. And with what happened to Maya, I don't know what I would do if I lost Raph" I say softly, my heart squeezing slightly at the thought. I wasn't saying I loved Raph more than I loved Donnie but it wasn't a secret that twins shared something.

Twins always held a special bond with each other. While our bond with Donnie was very strong, and I equally loved them, I had something special with Raph. We were twins after, we shared some connection and of course we were formed together. I couldn't imagine how I would feel if I would lose him, and I couldn't imagine how Charly must've felt when she lost Maya.

But once again she didn't look offended in any way, instead a sly smile spread on her face, her hand waving slightly as if she was saying it was okay. But while she was laughing, I could see sadness in her eyes, that was slowly making its way over her face as she opened her mouth.

"Don't be Leo, I understand. But yes, he did things to me. Hitting me, yelling etc. But once I was taken away 11 months ago I was given a new life, I went to college. But the things that had happened still haunted me, I didn't have any friends and the death of Maya was still fresh on my mind. It even reached the peak where I just didn't want to go on anymore. I didn't think I could live without her, it was like I'd lost a part of me, and at the same time I had lost my little brother" She said in a sad voice, eyeing at me.

"I raised him y'know. Carl never gave a damn, and I cared for him, I fed him when he was a baby if dad injected mom with drugs to shut her up again. It felt like I had lost everything in less than a day. I was at my end, that is until I met this girl who had also lost her twin, and invited me to come to a meeting with people like me. It was a daily meeting, and I went every day, and some people sent me to a psychologist. And here we are now"

Carefully she reached out for her younger brother, brushing through his hair gently. From this angle I could see her eyes, they were filled with relief. I could see how happy she was just by looking at her beautiful eyes. They were the same as Mikey had, but unlike his, these were filled with truthful joy. And the fact that her eyes held joy, gave me hope.

"Is that why you didn't call the police when April was abducted dad?"

Once again it was Donnie who was speaking, looking up to dad with a curious expression. I joined my youngest brother, staring at my dad and desperately waiting for answers. I wasn't there when Dad refused to call the cops, but Don had told me about it, and even I didn't know why dad wouldn't want to call the cops.

"The night Mikey was released, and we talked he told me about Charly, and the whole situation. I hired Kurtzman because I knew him very well and I knew I could trust him. We tried looking for you Charly but we had no lead. This morning Carl Buford confronted Kurtzman, telling him that he shouldn't look for his daughter, or she would be killed. He also told him there was someone watching her 24/7 so we couldn't do anything if we found her."

He started, Charly nodded to confirm all of it. She of course would know that there was someone watching her all the time. Of course she had to know, of course she would know because otherwise she would've gone to New York again, search for Mikey and 'save' him from her own father.

"They didn't find me until Carl called the one watching me after he abducted April, and that's how they traced my location. The man had no problem killing me so he didn't hesitate to shoot once he realized two cops nearing me. The bullet struck my shoulder by sheer luck because another cop has found its way to the man, and in the fight that man died. Good riddance" Charly finished. At the last part she snorted slightly, causing Mikey to steer and blink his eyes tiredly. Charly cringed slightly, bringing her hand to her mouth.

"Rae?" He whispered, reaching out for her as if he was testing if she was really there.

"I'm here Mikey, don't worry, it's all over now" Charly responded, patting Mikey on his chest to assure him. Mikey nodded and carefully sat up straight, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes. She gave Mikey another pat before opening her mouth. "So, what's going to happen now? April will surely testify, and Mikey can finally do so as well. Including me" She asked, turning towards my dad.

"The court will be in three days my child. They wanted it done as soon as possible. If luck, and common sense, is on our side, Carl will be locked up for good once the evidence is there. After all, we can now pinpoint where he used to take his victims, and I doubt he covered up anything there" Dad told with a calm voice, Mikey shaking his head to emphasize the point.

The blond teen was now sitting cross-legged on his bed, his hands in his lap. I watched him with watchful eyes, trying to read him. Apart from the obvious pain that was hidden in his eyes I could also see relief in his eyes. Because everything was over right now, no more secrets. And I was just so relieved there were no more secrets, no more suffering for Mikey.

Rae, I didn't even take the effort to ask where that nick name had come from. Because from experience I knew siblings could come up with the most illogical nicknames for their sibling. And that also explained who Mikey was referring to when he passed out in Raph's arms. He thought he had killed his big sister by telling the police. But he couldn't handle it anymore, he couldn't handle hurting another girl, especially a good friend.

That's the reason he told the police, and betrayed his big sister.

"I'm scared" Mikey stated softly, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks. Before any of us could react Charly let out a dry laugh, wrapping her arm around Mikey's neck and pulling him close while ruffling his hair non too gently. Mikey let out a whine and pulled away from his sis, but never let go of her hand.

"I missed you little bro" Charly said, giving Mikey's hand a soft squeeze.

"You know you've already said it right?" Mikey grinned slightly, surprising me slightly until I realized this was one of those precious moments. There was no sadness in his voice anymore, the only thing we now knew was the reunion of two lost siblings that were divided by their father, divided by death and trauma.

"Don't worry dudes, I love you too" Mikey added with a bright grin. "Including you Master Splinter" He added, causing dad to snicker. It was just a joke when Mikey had first watched our training, at the end Mikey had been dying to do something as well, so dad got out a piece of wood and smashed it with his hands, offering Mikey a try as well. From that day on he was called Master Splinter instead of just Master, or Sensei. Because of the splinter that had been stuck in Mikey's hand with his first try.

"Don't get too cocky bonehead" Raph smirked, crossing his arms but to my delight the only response he got was Mikey sticking out his tongue in response. I couldn't suppress the smile that was creeping on my face. For once, Mikey was truly himself. And for a second I thought everything was going to be fine.

I had no idea what was yet to come in three days.

**TMNT**

**Done! Gawd, it's finally done. I have no idea why this took me so long. But there you go, answers! :D There are a few things left but I think I got everything. If I didn't, please contact me because I either forgot it, or it's still mentioned. **

**Hope you liked it! **


	15. Chapter 15

**I really tried to get this court as realistic as possible, but I have no idea how it works, and I don't even get how it works here in The Netherlands. I tried to research it… but damn.. all those words were just too complicated for me xD 'native speaker' they said to me when I started my education…**

**So yea, it probably isn't entirely correct but I tried my best! **

TMNT

It's kinda weird how some days can be just torturously slow, and you're just sitting there, watching the hours tick by. While other days are over before you can even start that. These last few days… I can hardly remember them. Before I even knew what was going on I woke up, realizing it was _that_ day. Before I had even properly woken up I knew today was the day Carl would be going to court, including us.

I yawned slightly, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, or trying to. I wasn't really surprised by my sudden tiredness, I hadn't really slept well last night. For some reason I had a horrible feeling something would go wrong, but I had no idea what. They had enough evidence to put Carl in jail, April could tell the judge everything, the FBI had already searched the whole basement and they also found Carl's fingerprints.

But still I feared for my little brothers, for Mikey.

What if Carl did manage to get free? Or if he got a sentence for a few years, and he'd be free after that? He knows we helped Mikey, he knows we are the ones that helped with his arrest. I don't want him to go after Don or Raph, and I certainly didn't want him to go after Mikey again. He needed peace in his life if he ever wanted to heal.

I shook my head slightly, no, I just had to tell myself everything would work out. We were trained ninjas after all, Don and Raph could protect themselves, and we would all protect Mikey if Carl would be set free.

I quickly got dressed, already feeling a bit better. Carl wouldn't even be able to touch him, not as long as we were here. So why did I still have that nagging feeling in my chest?

I sigh in annoyance, walking over to the kitchen to pour myself a cup of tea. It was very early, another disadvantage of not being able to sleep, so it was still completely dark outside. Though the moon wasn't as high in the air as it was during midnight, there still wasn't any sign of the upcoming sun. Dad wasn't even up yet, and that said a lot.

"Couldn't sleep either?"

I let out a frightened yelp as a sudden voice pierces through the silence. Charly was sitting casually at the kitchen table, slowly sipping at a cup of tea without any care in the world. But I also knew there had to be a reason why she was up this early. She wasn't the last one to wake up or anything, but this was just ridiculous.

Besides, she just asked me if I couldn't sleep either.

"No, I ha- " I cut myself off in time, almost telling Charly about the feeling I've been having last night. I would only make her worry more, and I really didn't want to do that. She was nervous enough without me telling about this nagging feeling I've been getting all night right now.

"Are you nervous for today?" I ask instead, leaning against the kitchen counter as the water started to heat up. Charly looked up to me, her bright blue eyes staring into mine. Her shoulders moved up and down, shrugging slightly.

"I don't know, I feel kinda weird y'know. I just can't believe it's all over, and I haven't seen him since the day.. well that day" She said, wiggling her fingers slightly, or the ones that were still left on her right hand. I nodded slightly, pouring the warm water into a cup and walking over to the table as well, sitting down across Charly.

"I can see you're worried but it'll be fine Charly," I told her gently, reaching out for her hand and squeezing it slightly. She lifted her head towards me, giving me another smile but I could see the first tears making their way into her eyes.

"I know Leo, I just don't know if I'll be able to.. to see him. I may look confident or anything, and what I've gone through doesn't even come close to what Mikey's gone through, but it still happened y'know" She told me, quickly wiping away the stray tears on her cheeks. Even after all that time, she still carried the scars inflicted by her own father.

This time it's my turn to smile at her, her confidence is truthful, and I truly believe she had healed the time she'd be gone. But something like that, getting tortured by your own father, will always leave some scars. And only the prospect of seeing something like him can scare anyone, no matter how well you are doing.

"It's okay to cry Charly. It can't be easy seeing Carl after everything he's done to you and Mikey" I tell her gently, pleased as a smile once again appears on her face.

"I know, I know" She laughs, using the back of her hand to wipe away some tears that managed to slip from her eyes. "I just feel like… like.. I got away y'know. I got help and Mikey didn't. He had you of course, but he never really escaped. And I feel like I have no right to cry, since Mikey had to go through more" She explains.

I felt bad for smiling, almost. It meant that she was finally taking away her shields, and allowing herself to finally cry about the whole situation. She was healed, I couldn't deny that, but seeing the one responsible for the torture of so many children, your own little brother, can't be easy.

"You can't say that Charly, it's like breaking or bruising your wrist. Breaking a bone probably hurts more, but it both hurts. It's the same with you and Mikey. Maybe Mikey went through more, but you went through a traumatic experience as well" I told her gently. From across the table Charly snorted, which quickly turned into a short laugh.

"Have you ever bruised your wrist? That shit hurts Leo" She laughed, cocking an eyebrow but eventually a grin spread on her face, looking me in the eyes. "But thanks Leo, I'll try to remember"

TMNT

I never thought I'd be sitting here, countless of eyes staring at my back, Yoshi's hand on my shoulder, my dad almost next to me and all of us facing one person in this room, the judge. I was currently sitting at one of the two tables meant for the competing parties.

I was sitting next to Yoshi, and next to Yoshi was Kurtzman acting as my attorney. I was sitting on the far left side of the room and the table. On the right side was the other table. On the left side was my dad's attorney while dad was sitting on the right side. He was handcuffed and the cuffs were attached to the table so he couldn't escape. No one was about to let him go now.

The room was filled with numerous people, mostly family from the victims. I even spotted some of the purple dragons in the far back of the room, glaring at me when I looked at them. Even Casey was present, and I knew why, the man who hurt and killed his little sister was finally getting what he deserved, including the one who helped him.

I took a deep breath and looked down at my hands again. I had accepted whatever punishment I'd be getting already, couldn't say I wasn't nervous at all. I didn't want to go to juvie, but I knew I deserved everything that was coming. I killed, I hurt innocent girls. I got my big sister killed, and managed to claim two fingers of my other sister.

"You okay Mikey?" Raph whispered, apparently noticing my distress.

A shy smile appeared on my face as I looked at my left. There were three places where people could sit. The 'claimant', me, sitting at one of the two tables. The audience sitting behind me, and the people who would testify on the left of me. And I was really glad they were this close to me, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for them.

Don was sitting on the second row, April huddled close to him. April's eyebrows were now neatly stitched though you could still see them. But the doctors had told her that it wouldn't be evident once they removed the stitches and the wound healed. She had a few bruises on her skin but other than that she seemed fine actually.

But I knew that she was having nightmares from her time with Carl.

Both Raph, Leo and Charly were sitting next to each other, Leo, as the oldest of the brothers, sitting in the middle. And my smile brightened a bit as I saw Leo holding Charly's hand. It obviously wasn't a romantic gesture in any way, Leo was comforting Charly because it wasn't a secret that she was nervous as well. Mom wasn't here.. she was still in the hospital because of the drugs, and she even refused to go to court.

I gave Raph a small smile, nodding slightly to him and he returned the nod. My attention was snapped towards the front of the courtroom however as a loud bang sounded through the room, the judge slamming his hammer on the wooden plank.

"The case, in the matter of Carl Buford is now officially opened. Present in the court room is the plaintiff and claimant Mikey Buford and his attorney Jack Kurtzman" The judge started, gesturing to our table. "And the defendant Carl Buford and his attorney Simon Williams"

A sound of disproval echoed through the room the moment Carl's name was called. The judge didn't even budge and just flicked his wrist again, hitting the hammer to silence the room. Almost immediately the room fell silent again.

"Carl Buford, you are being accused of kidnapping multiple children ranging between the ages of 7 and 16, torture, rape, manipulation, black-mailing, asking ransom and murder." Again, I took a deep breath, waiting for the inevitable sentence that was sure to come.

"Mikey Buford, you are being accused of torture of multiple children ranging between the ages of 7 and 16, and murder"

I closed my eyes as almost half of the room seemed to explode, deliberately blocking out the shouts of protest coming from Leo and Raph, but especially Raph. And even some people in the audience seemed to be on my side, shouting things like 'ridiculous' and 'it wasn't his choice'. I smiled inwards, people were actually standing up for me, but I knew what was coming.

I had never withheld the information about Carl because I was afraid of being sentenced, I knew I was guilty, and that I deserved this. Just how Carl knew that there was now talking out of this situation, I knew that my punishment was inevitable as well. There was evidence I did all those things, and I would pay for them.

I just tried not to look to the side, ignoring the look Yoshi was giving me, ignoring the looks the guys and Charly were giving me. I didn't even focus on the trial itself, lost in my thoughts. I rarely even noticed dad's part.

The trial… it went so fast. Dad.. he wasn't even trying anymore. His attorney just objected when dad was asked to tell his side of the story, he already knew he couldn't talk himself out of this, and yet dad was still smiling, the grin that I grew to hate. The grin that was still inside of me, flowing through my DNA. I was grateful I had my mom's personality, and her freckles. But other traits were directly from dad.

My bright blue eyes, my blond hair, my smile, my laugh. Things that would always remind me of him.

TMNT

"Mikey Buford, please proceed"

I sighed slightly as my name was being called by the judge, turning the attention to me. Yoshi gave a me a soft and assuring squeeze before I leaned into the microphone that was standing on our table. I felt everyone staring at me, but I tried to ignore them. Yoshi and the guys were close, they were with me and maybe that was the little assurance I needed right now.

I knew what I had to say, I knew what happened, I had practiced it with Kurtzman and Yoshi multiple times. But even without their help, I would've been able to tell what had happened without any doubt. It was my life after all.

"I was a normal kid when I was younger, like many of you in this room…" I started with low yet confident voice. The story came out so easily, the images and every single event that led to the other spilling. Everyone able to hear what had happened during my whole life. I kept nothing from them, after 5 years of lying to everyone, I was done.

No more lies, no more secrets. They already knew, it was already over, it didn't matter anymore. It didn't matter because they already knew what I'd done, the only thing I still wanted to do was tell them my side of the story. How I never wanted this life, and I never started this. And even so, I was just as guilty as my own father.

I told them everything, me feeding those two girls. Dad beating the shit out of me. How scared I was back then. How Casey's sister was my first victim, and how I broke her fingers. The 17 girls I saw coming, and I had to say goodbye to. And how I killed Ashely Bates. And in the end, about Yue. I knew her family was in this room, both Fong and Toa.

And I knew the family of all the abducted girls were here, including Mr. and Mrs. Bates.

"I never had the intention of hurting all those girls, but I had a share in their suffering and one's death. I'll accept every punishment that seems fitting" I finish the story with a quiet whisper, bowing my head slightly in a defeated gesture. Almost immediately I could hear a loud noise coming from my left.

"Objection sir!" Leo practically yelled through the room, causing me to look at him. I flinched slightly when I saw him, he was glaring at me. He was angry at me for saying such a thing. I should've seen it coming though, I had never mentioned this to them, about me accepting my punishment. I guess they didn't really realize that I committed horrible crimes as well.

The judge nodded his head slightly, accepting Leo's objection. Leo shot me a last look, much kinder this time, before walking towards the front of the room.

"Hello everyone, my name is Hamato Leonardo" He introduced himself, a sly smile appearing on his face as he continued. "And for the last 4 months, Mikey has been something very dear to me, getting dangerously close to a little brother" I smiled slightly when he said that, a little brother, was I really that important to them?

"I know you all know what Carl Buford did, and that Mikey had his share as well, but there is a side none of you know yet. The first night he came at our house he was drenched because of the rain, and he had nowhere to go. We took him in and offered him dry clothes and a place to sleep" He started, looking at me with a smile, which I returned.

I still remember that first night. It was really weird how one of your bad nights could turn into … this. I never regretted coming to them. It was pure accident actually. I knew their dojo, it was pretty famous after all, and the moment I saw it, I just reacted. They accepted me, and they helped me. And I found something I had lost long ago; hope.

"He cried that very first night, he was having a terrible nightmare. He was sweating, thrashing and even screaming. We later found out the reason why; the things Carl did to him, and made him do. Mikey was forced to do all those things, he was threatened and Carl hurt him badly to make sure he wouldn't tell anything. Carl killed his only friend, tortured and killed his sister in front of Mikey, and sent his other sister away to keep him from telling anything" Leo told, looking in my direction.

I just bit my lip, looking away from him. I never had any problem with him telling this, I just couldn't take hearing everything that happened. It only reminded me, how I got Maya killed, how I was too much of a coward to free those girls, how I hurt April. Leo seemed to notice this and started to walk towards me, stopping next to me.

I dared to look up again, catching his sea blue eyes. He slowly extended his arm and held out his hand as an invitation. I bit my lip again but eventually I accepted it, though I didn't even know what I was accepting. I didn't like it, I wanted to know what Leo was going to do, but at the same time I trusted him with my life. He led me to the front of the whole room and leaned towards me.

"I want to show them" Leo whispered so the others wouldn't hear him, patting my back as he whispered that sentence, and I immediately knew what he wanted to do. My eyes widened for a second, gnawing at my lip in unease. I really didn't want to… but I knew it would help the case.. it would help to lock Carl up for good.

So reluctantly I nodded.

My hands were trembling slightly as I reached for my shirt, Leo helping me to pull it over my head, revealing my scarred back. I hung my head in shame and turned my back to the audience. There were gasps all around the court, whispering voices filling the room.

"Carl used to hit him whenever he disobeyed the slightest. The night he told Mikey about his 'business', when he set free Yue, when Mikey attempted to get his mom out of the city and so on." Leo explained to the audience, already knowing the full story. All of them knew about the scars on my back, and they all knew the story behind them.

More gasps spread through the room and after a few seconds I quickly pulled the shirt over my head again, a little bit of tension leaving my body as the fabric covered my back again. Leo smiled and I walked back to the table, sitting down.

"Do you have any evidence for this claim Leonardo?" The judge stated, everyone, and I mean everyone here wanted Carl locked up. And even if the judge couldn't take sides, it wasn't a fact that he wanted Carl in prison as well. But Leo's story wasn't enough.. he needed witnesses, or prove. But from the look on Leo's face, he already expected this question as he nodded his head immediately.

"We have, your Honor, I would like to call in April O'Neil. Victim of Carl Buford" He called out, looking over to both April and Donnie. April nodded slightly but never released Don's hand, forcing him to go with her. Leo moved out of the way so April and Donnie could take place in front of the courtroom. I could see April fearfully eying at Carl for a second but quickly turned away from him and opening her mouth.

"It's true what Leo said. Carl waited for me when I came back home late at night, and took me to.. to his basement." April started, cracking slightly as she told the story. "He tied me up on my knees and left me alone for the rest of the night. He came back eventually, taunting me and saying the Mikey would be coming as well, and he would hurt me badly"

Slowly tears started to fall down her cheeks, and a shudder went through her body. Don immediately placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, April slowly reaching out for his hand and squeezing it slightly. She smiled gently through the tears and Donnie gave her an assuring nod.

"Mikey refused to hurt me, he was screaming at his dad, yelling that he wouldn't hurt me, that he was done. Carl threatened to kill me instead, and that's the only reason Mikey hurt me. Because he didn't want me to die. He cut my eyebrows because he knew those would bleed a lot without a lot of pain."

Once again a shudder went through her body, and she immediately tightened her hold on Don's hand. She shot me a quick smile before returning to the audience again.

"Carl blindfolded and gagged me afterwards, praising Mikey at the same time and eventually sending him away. Hours later he came back again, hugging me tightly 'it's gonna be okay, the police are outside, everything'll be okay' He whispered in my ear, so Carl wouldn't hear it. Mikey didn't want to hurt me, or any of those girls. So please do not punish him for things he couldn't refuse to do. He's the victim just as much as those girls"

TMNT

I always hated waiting, I hated not being able to do anything. And right now that was exactly what I was doing, nothing. The only thing I, and the rest of the audience, could do was wait while the judge was making the decision. He would be the one to decide what punishment Carl will have, and which one I will get.

After a full 40 minutes of waiting the judge finally came back in the room, and immediately the whole crowd fell silent. Everyone was eager to know what punishment would be given to both Carl and me. They all wanted to see how one of the most hated man in New York right now would be locked up for his whole life.

"In the matter of the case of Carl Buford" The judge started, looking into the room before turning back to the paper. "He is going to impose a life sentence in the Vernon C. Bain Correctional Center prison and he will be giving permission to write, call or meet one person once every month with approval of a personal guard." The sentence rang through the room, immediately followed by the hammer coming down.

Life sentence.

He was going to be locked up for life. It was over, it was really over. He would finally pay for everything he had done. The families would finally be able to let their fallen children rest in peace, knowing that the murderer was behind bars. People would finally be able to let their children go onto the streets again, it was over, done.

"In the matter of the case of Mikey Buford" I took a deep breath, the relief suddenly gone completely, I could feel Yoshi squeezing my shoulder slightly but I could only concentrate on the judge. "He won't be sentenced for the crimes since he had no free will in committing them and he won't be serving any sentence. However, he'll need to see a weekly therapist of choice and he will need a stable and legal guardian to care for him. That will be all"

And with that the hammer came down, announcing my sentence. I was… free? Was I dreaming again? It couldn't be, could it? Two arms suddenly wrapped around me, hugging me tightly. I didn't respond, not directly. It wasn't until I felt another pair of arms wrap around me that I snapped out of it, a smile appearing on my face.

"I told you little bro, there is no way they would've sentenced you" Charly laughed lightly, pressing an embarrassing kiss against my temple before releasing me.

"Thanks sis, all of you. Y-you've helped me so much" I say, still a bit shaky, and looking at everyone around me, Don, April, Raph, Leo, Charly, Yoshi and even Kurtzman who defended me just an hour ago. The happiness wasn't meant to be long however, as a voice I had hoped never to hear again boomed through the courtroom.

"Your honor, I accept the punishment but I would like to show my son something before I will be taken to jail" Carl stated, looking directly at me with a grin on his face. The room fell silent once again, everyone waiting for the judge response, and what Carl was about to say. Me? I was frozen, not even progressing what was happening, not fully at least.

"You may" The judge said, gazing at the policemen that were around Carl. They released the chain that held Carl to the table and dad stood up with careful movement, slowly walking to the front of the room. I didn't know I was holding my breath until I felt two strong arms wrap around me and holding me upright, my head pounding from the loss of oxygen.

Raph wasn't looking at me however, his arms were around me but his eyes were focused on my dad.

"Carly, sweetheart." He started, snickering when Charly snorted in utter rage. "You never liked that name did you? Not after you found out what I was capable off. But I feel like I should explain myself, to both of you. And I now know that I won't be sentenced for this particular fact" He continued, causing me to frown slightly while my heart was still beating in my chest.

I could see Leo slowly inching towards Carl, his stance ready to jump in case he would try something.

"The technique I used with you Carly was a technique I came up with. I thought it would be the best way to let you obey me, and it would be enough for you to be my successor. But it didn't work, so when you were born" He said, looking at me. He slowly reached for his shirt, showing the cops no sudden movement.

My eyes widened as he turned around. No… it couldn't.. it couldn't be…..

"When you were born I used another technique, a technique I knew would work, from experience." And that's when his shirt fell to the ground, the scars on his back showing. The same scars that were on my back.


	16. Chapter 16

"Why?"

The only normal sentence I could think of right now, the only sentence I dared to open my mouth for. And the only question I really wanted to ask right now, I wanted to know why. _Why he was doing this to me, and why me? _I didn't understand why he would do something like that, why me? He had never been loving, like other fathers at school but I never thought he'd hate me.

He never visited school, he never met my teachers. He was never too enthusiastic about anything, not my drawings when I was younger, not my good marks when I showed them. He never allowed my friends to come to our home, he never told me bedtime story like other fathers did. He never did, but I never thought he hated me enough to do _this. _

"You will be my successor son, once day, you'll be just like me"

Back then I didn't know what he meant, I knew I would never be like him. If I'd ever get kids myself, if I'd ever grow up, I'd never hurt anyone like that ever again. I would never ever become him, and back than I was so sure I wouldn't.

"One day, you won't have to listen to me"

_Was he letting me go? Would he stop making me hurt those little girls? _

"One day, you won't have to listen to me"

_No, one day I would be him, I would be his successor, like he always wanted me to be. He was right all along. He wasn't letting me go, he was letting me free but he would never let me go because the moment he started hitting me, I became him. _

"I am sorry for hitting you, but you'll learn to obey me one day, and I won't have to hit you anymore"

_If I behave, he won't hit me? Even if I hurt those little kids? I won't get hurt if I follow him, why? Hitting little kids isn't good, it's against the rules. Those girls have families! But… I don't want to get hurt. I don't understand…_

"I am sorry for hitting you, but you'll learn to obey me one day, and I won't have to hit you anymore"

_Oh God…. He wasn't letting me go.. I'd obey him.. I obeyed him! He didn't hit me, but I still obeyed him. I've become him… I've become what he wanted me to be. A son to be proud of, someone he could see himself in. A son, a killer, a murderer, a sadist, a kidnapper. _

_A successor. _

A successor.

"You'll learn to enjoy it son, one day you'll be just like me."

No!

"You'll never get rid of me, I _am _you"

Please no…

"Listen to me when I'm talking to you! .listen!"

Leave me alone… please.

Back then I didn't understand.. but now I did why he said everything, why he did all those things to me. Why he wanted me to hit those little girls, and why he was saying all those things to me. Back then, I never understood them, and I never dared to ask why he was saying those things, afraid of being hit again, afraid of making him angry. But now I understood.

I was becoming _him. _

* * *

Green eyes, staring right down at me with a worried look filling his orbs. Both hands were placed on either side of my shoulders, hovering over me. Faint sounds reached my ears but at the same time I wasn't really progressing what was happening around me, I wasn't truly hearing the talking, the movements, or I was just blocking it out.

Something was placed under my feet, elevating them slightly. Someone was stroking my hair slightly, and for once I didn't pull away at the gesture. It felt nice, soothing. I closed my eyes again with a soft groan, my head throbbing with every heartbeat. Why did I feel so weak?

"Give him some air Raph" Donnie immediately ushered. Fingers tapped lightly on my cheek, probably Don. "Mikey, can you hear me buddy?" He asked with a soft voice, for which I was grateful, my head was killing me. I hummed slightly, telling him I was able to hear him. Slowly I opened my eyes again, now staring into 3 concerned faces.

"What happened?"

My voice was barely audible, but that didn't matter, because the moment I looked around slightly I knew exactly what had happened. Only seeing the court room again reminded me of the whole thing. Dad's sentence, my 'sentence' but most importantly, the scars on his back… He was me.. and I was him. Everything that had happened to me… everything I'd gone through.. the same thing happened to my dad.

And I would be doing the same things he did in the future.

"What's wrong, does anything hurt?" Donnie immediately asked when tears jumped into my eyes. I shook my head, trying to assure him I was okay but a pained hiss escapes my mouth when the thumping pain returns again. "Dad, lift him up a bit, it'll help with his headache." Immediately Splinter nods, carefully hovering me up slightly, allowing my head to rest on his lap.

I let out a content sight, feeling the constant pressure leave, and the headache disappearing slowly. Still, Yoshi keeps ruffling through my blond hair, like a worried parent. And considering his worried look, I was pretty sure he was. The only thing I didn't understand was why. I wasn't his son, he shouldn't be worrying about me.

"You fainted after Carl showed you his back" Donnie said, answering my previous question, not like I didn't remember already. "What does it mean Mikey…? I don't understand.." He added with a soft voice, taking one of my hands in between his.

"I'm him Don… " I whisper pitifully, causing both Raph and Don to frown slightly. My eyes dart around slightly, looking around the now empty room. There was absolutely nobody anymore. All the audience was gone, the judge, dad, Kurtzman. The only people that were still left were the guys, Splinter, April, Charly and .. Casey.

That last one surprised me slightly, why would he wait around? It was done, he had revenged his sister.. He didn't need to be here anymore, his sister could finally rest in peace.. And only after a few seconds I realized that he couldn't. Because I was still free, and he still blamed me. And honestly, I didn't know whether to agree with him or not.

He was sitting next to April on the second row, holding her hand to calm her down. While April had her eyes fixed on me, a worried expression on her face, Casey was looking away, his mouth set in a firm line. Leo and Charly were sitting on the first row. Tears were streaming down Charly's face, but she wasn't sobbing, only staring ahead of her while Leo had an arm around her looking completely lost himself.

Only Charly seemed to understand what those scars really meant….

"What do you mean Mikey? You're in no way similar to him. You would never hurt anyone like he did." Donnie stated, a fully determined look on his face. He didn't understand it.

"Those scars Don.. his dad did the same thing to him.. the same thing dad did to me… " I whisper, tightening my grip on Donnie's hand as tears streamed down my face. "Please Donnie.. I don't wanna be him.. I don't w-want to…"

Realization finally seemed to spread across of his face, including Raph's face. Their eyes going wide as they finally understood what those scares meant, it meant I was going to be him, and I was going to do all those things as well in the future. But instead of walking away, Raph only inched closer to me, reaching for my only free hand.

"Never Mikey, you'll _never_ be him. Well get you help okay? We'll make sure you won't turn into him 'kay?" And for some reason, I believed him. I really believed that the guys could protect me from becoming him. And Charly, she got better as well. She got help, and she got over everything, even over the death of Maya.

Did that mean I could do so as well?

"What happened after I passed out.?" I eventually ask, trying to distract them from this particular topic. It wasn't like I didn't believe them, I just didn't want to believe them.. what if I did become him? I never doubted the guys, or Charly, but I doubted myself. I didn't want to believe them, I didn't want to fall again, I didn't want to be disappointed again.

Donnie and Raph both shared a quick glace but apparently decided to let me, as Donnie answered my question.

"Nothing much, you were only out for a few minutes. There were some medics that wanted to help you, but I assured them it was fine." Donnie started, stopping for a second and staring at me. I nodded hesitantly, asking him to continue.

"Carl is sent to prison right now, and dad will have to talk to the judge and the child service to see what'll happen next." Don continues, flashing me an encouraging smile. "Don't worry Mikey, everything will be alright, you'll see." And with that he stands up, hiding the obvious pins and needles he was feeling all over his legs. He said nothing as he extended a hand, tempting me to take it.

And much to my surprise I found myself gratefully accepting the hand. I could feel my vision clouding slightly when Donnie hauled me up too quickly but as soon as I was fully standing that disappeared again. I offered Don a smile, silently thanking him, all of them for helping me so far. Right now, Leo, April and Charly had joined us as well, the latter wrapping her arms around me shortly.

"It'll be alright little bro, you'll see" She whispered in my ear before releasing me again. I smiled at her gesture, nodding in approval before looking around the circle.

"Let us go home, all of us, this has been a very long day" Yoshi suddenly announced, also standing up from his sitting position. He gives me a short nod of approval before gesturing us to follow him. The guys, April and Charly all following him, but I found myself rooted in place.

"Ya coming Mike?" Raph asks, turning around when he notices I'm not moving at all. I look at him, smiling slightly.

"Go ahead dude, I just need to do something" I call out, my pocket burning painfully right now. Burning with something I _need _to do. Raph however seems a bit hesitant, walking over to me again.

"Just make it quick okay? We have a lot to talk about." He says with a surprisingly soft voice, placing a hand over my right arm, right where the needle marks are.

I wince slightly when he touches it, not because it hurts but because it reminds me of the moments I took those drugs. Raph knows they are there, and he deliberately placed his hand on that spot. He doesn't want to say it out loud, but we both know it needs to be addressed. So instead of recoiling from the touch, I nod.

"I will dude" I say, stepping backwards to move. "And thanks.. for everything" I add, before walking through the courtroom, following Casey.

* * *

"Casey! Wait up!" I yell when I notice the black-haired teen walking through the large hall. Casey immediately stops when he hears my name, twirling around with a glare on his face. "Before you say anything, please hear me out" I say, before Casey had the chance to open his mouth, and yell at me or something.

Casey glares for a second, his chin raising slightly before he nods reluctantly, obviously not happy with the prospect of listening to me. I'm just glad he's at least willing to hear me out. He crosses his arm, staring at me, waiting for me to say what I wanted to say. I take a deep breath, trying to form the words correctly in my head.

"I know you're still mad at me, well mad isn't the word but .. y'know… And I know you'll never forgive me, and I understand that. I just wanted to give you something." I start, reaching for my pocket and pulling out the object that has been in my pocket for all these days since April had been freed from my own dad.

"Sophie made it years ago.. she wanted to give it to you, for your birthday, but she never could.." I explain, not daring to look into Casey's eyes. "She asked me to give it to you if she'd die in there… but I never had the guts to confront you after everyone found out… I'm sorry" I whisper, shoving the necklace into Casey's now open hand. I wanted nothing more than to run away, but I knew I had to do this.

"My dad kept it in this box, I snatched it before the police could get their hands on it. I knew you'd need it more than I did." I clarify, never regretting anything about that particular action. Casey needed this.. and even if I was withholding evidence, I didn't care. This was Casey's, not my way to freedom. It belonged to him.

Casey said nothing as he slowly clicked open the necklace, slowly tears appearing as he saw the picture of his little sister in the necklace. I've seen it countless times, Sophie used to show it to me, it was a picture of them. Casey and Sophie together. Casey was holding Sophie, and they were both laughing at the camera, back when they were still happy…

Slowly Casey's finger hovered over the right part of the necklace, pushing the tiny button that was on it. Not even seconds later a cheery voice erupted from the small recording box. I turned my head away at the cheery voice, telling her big brother how much she loved him, and how she wished him a happy birthday. That was the last time she recorded anything.

That was still when they were a happy family.. before I ruined everything by not telling anyone what my father did. Before she died.

"Get out" Casey spat out in a low voice, tears in his eyes as he replayed the message again. My eyes widened slightly, but only for a mere second. My head lowered slightly, hiding my face before walking away, doing as he told me. I knew he hated me, and I knew he was emotional because of the whole necklace so I didn't blame him for doing such a thing, telling me to get out of there, and leave him alone.

Though I never expected him to stop me.

"Mikey..?" His voice was low and a bit hesitant. "I can't forgive you just yet.. but thank you" He said, barely too low for me to hear it, tilting the necklace slightly to indicate what he was talking about. And before I could respond, he turned around and he was gone.

Mere minutes later I was welcomed by Raph wrapping his arm around me pressing me close to him. I smiled at him shyly, allowing him to drag me to Yoshi's car. April, Leo, Charly and Don were already gone, April's dad had offered to give them a ride home, since 6 persons wouldn't fit in Yoshi's car. Raph sat on the side of the car, while I was stuck in the middle, my head leaning against Raph's shoulder.

It was already dark outside, and even the small trip from the building to the car had me shivering. Raph had an arm wrapped around my shoulder, rubbing it up and down to warm me up slightly. I smiled against his shoulder, making myself comfortable against him while Yoshi drove us back home. There was a full moon, standing high above us.

I stared at it in amazement, ignoring the speeding cars which passed us. And it was that moment I realized that I was free. Mom was getting the help she always needed, to help her from the drug and alcohol addiction my dad forced on her. Dad was being sent away, locked up for life. And Charly was finally back with me.

I closed my eyes with a smile, letting tiredness take me over. I think both Raph and Yoshi knew I wasn't truly asleep when we arrived at home, still Raph didn't hesitant to slip an arm under my knees, hovering me up bridal style.

"You're really annoying ya know that right?" Raph whispered with a mocking tone, quickly stepping inside, dad closing the door behind us. I smile into his hold, not opening my eyes. Raph barely made a sound when he opened the door of the guest room, not wanting to wake Charly up, if she was even asleep. But his quietness I could already guess. She must've been exhausted.

Raph dropped me onto the bed with a satisfying smirk, I was too tired to say something in return, so instead I just pulled the covers over me, making comfortable. I knew this wouldn't last forever, and I couldn't stay with them forever. No both my parents were unable to care for me I would definitely be sent to a foster home, and I knew how such things worked.

Yet, I refused to think about it. I wouldn't think about the future just yet, and a smile made his way up my face as I heard Raph mutter 'squirt' before leaving the room.

For now I would just enjoy the moment, knowing it wouldn't last forever.

* * *

**Finally it's done! I'm still not satisfied but I rewrote this so many times… so I'm gonna post it anyways.**


	17. Chapter 17

I have absolutely no idea why time doesn't just make up his mind, like one month goes by before you can even blink, but another day feels like an eternity. And it's confusing the heck out of me. Like these past months, it seemed like they went so fast. But from the moment we met Mikey.. and April was abducted, somehow those months seemed to be so slow. So tortuously slow.

Sure there were some, well a lot of, tough moments, but time flew by so quickly. Before we could actually progress what was happening, we were preparing for a trial which would hopefully lock Mikey's father away for life, which we managed to do by the way. But these last two months, they just seemed to drag on endlessly.

It seemed like we have been living like this for years right now, but it has only been two months. Though on the other side, Mikey did come a long way in these two months. If his smiling face next to me wasn't enough prove already. He changed so much these 6 months, in a good way at least. He was still somewhere at the bottom, but he was slowly climbing.

"So, how'd it go?" I finally ask him, keeping my eyes on the road in front of me. Next to me Mikey shrugs slightly, his smile faltering slightly.

"Good, we didn't do much actually. Renet figured we should do something else with what happened last time" He answered, shrugging slightly. I nodded bluntly, knowing fully what he meant with the last time. That time he didn't come out of the building with a smile on his face, no, he didn't come out of the building at all.

It was Renet, his psychologist, who came out of the building, saying I should get inside. Mikey had been so distressed back then, just two days ago. They had gone back in time, and Mikey had to relive his childhood so to speak. I didn't know what exactly, I sucked at that type of stuff, but I knew it was something bad. Took me some time to even calm him down. So I was glad Renet decided to do something 'light'.

I wanted to reply to his comment, but I wasn't very good with this sentimental talk, I had never been.

"How's April doing actually?" Instead it was Mikey who beat me to it. I quickly glanced to the right, studying Mikey slightly. He did seem to be more … relaxed than other days. He was looking out of the window with a distant look on his face, but an unfamiliar relaxed expression on his face.

"She's okay, ya can't hardly see the scars anymore" I assured him, knowing he didn't like talking about it. Even after these two months he still blamed himself for the wounds he gave April. He was smart though, and because he cut her eyebrows, there wouldn't be any visible scars left.

"So how are your roommates?" I eventually ask, genuinely curious. After his dad had been sent to prison and his mom was sent away to help her with her addiction, Mikey was sent to a foster home. Just 1 week ago his roommate moved away, adopted, and two others moved into the room. Needlessly to say Mikey was very nervous. He got along with that person quite well.

Unfortunately the foster wasn't close to our home, and it'd take a while for Mikey to get to our house. Luckily Renet, his psychologist, wasn't that far from either. It was actually somewhere in the middle of his foster home and our home. Still too long to walk, so I had offered to pick him up after every session, and bring him to his foster home again, since we weren't allowed to let Mikey stay for the night for some reason.

"I don't know Raph…. my room mates, Jeffrey and Clay.. .. they're okay I guess. They just ignore me most of the time" I wince inwards upon hearing those words. I knew it was inevitable that this would happened but it still hurt me to hear how these guys ignored Mikey. No one could forget Carl Buford, no one would ever forget it, or what Mikey had done.

And while it was clear that Mikey was the victim as well, they mostly wanted to avoid him because the fear was too fresh.

"It's okay though.. I knew it'd happen, and I still made some friends. I met this guy in the foster home. His name is Luke but I called him Leatherhead. And another boy, Mundo, or Jason." Mikey hastily said, actually smiling a little at the memory. I quickly joined him, delighted to see that Mikey had made some friends at last.

"Told ya it'd work out. They just need a little time, that's all" I offer, catching a shy smile from the corner of my eye. Mikey hummed in agreement, nodding his head slightly. Soon after, we arrived at home, Mikey obviously feeling better than he had when he got into the car, then again visiting us always managed to cheer him up.

TMNT

Ever since everything had happened, dad telling me what he really did in his free time, dad forcing me to join, and of course everything that happened after I met Raph, Leo and don, I was never a fan of surprises. I hated not knowing what would happen, I absolutely hated it. Of course I was excited for a present, or those things, but things I wasn't prepared for could always turn out badly.

But this wasn't a present, and they certainly didn't announce this to me. It wasn't really a surprise either, just not knowing why Angel was now sitting on one of the two couches, along with Splinter, Leo and Donnie. I give Raph a confused look, and I'm sure that the fear is clearly visible as well, since he gives me a short but gentle squeeze before leading me to the unoccupied couch.

My stomach twisted at the reason why Angel was here. I didn't know, and that's what scared me.

"Why's she here?" I practically squeaked, my voice once again betraying me. My heart was beating against my chest as I sat down next to Raph.

"Honey, don't be afraid." Angel said, flashing me a smile. I was surprised to see her smile, it was genuine. I didn't know why, but she seemed to like me a lot. I never saw her treating me the same as the other foster kids. The moment I came to that foster home, she had taken upon herself to look after me as much as she could. There were others who could help me, and she really shouldn't have, figuring she was the boss of the foster home, but she kept asking about me, helping me whenever I needed it.

But she had never been _here_. She often called me to talk to her in during these 8 weeks, asking me about .. well everything that had happened. She was genuinely curious, asking me about Renet, and how I was feeling every day. She even helped me with setting up my room with Jeffrey and Clay, knowing how much I just wanted to keep the room for myself.

Not because I was selfish, but because I was afraid of the roommates I'd possibly get.

"We have something for you Mikey.. and we want you to be honest okay?" Leo said, as Sensei pulled something from behind his back. Next to me Raph smirked slightly, putting a hand on my shoulder to assure me. I flashed him a shy smile before focusing on the package that Splinter was handing to me.

"Before you open it I want to say that we have thoroughly discussed this before offering this to you" Splinter said as he released the package. It wasn't a big package, but still quite heavy.

"Just remember Hon, the choice is up to you" Angel added. I nodded slightly, opening the box with hesitant movements. I frowned however when I saw what was in the box. I slowly removed it from the box, staring at everyone with confusion, Leo's birth certificate in my own hands. Raph smiled next to me, motioning for me to continue.

A little less hesitant, but more confused right now, I picked up the next item from the box. A birth certificate from Raph. Just like Leo's, there were two names actually. 'Hamato Raphael' and another name, which I figured was Raph's name in Japanese. The next one was quite different. Instead of a birth certificate it was an adoption certificate, and I wasn't surprised to see Donnie's name on it.

Proudly written in the middle of the paper 'Hamato Donatello'. But the second name confused me again. 'Formerly known as Kita Ichirou'. I looked up from the paper.

"Your name was Kita?" I questioned in a soft voice, afraid to catch Donnie's eyes. But instead of being offended, Don laughed.

"My name was Ichirou, the firstborn son. Remember that we switch name and surname in Japan" He told me gently. "And don't worry, I like Donatello more" He added, beaming slightly. I nodded, putting the framed certificate aside. My hands were now fully trembling and I was actually afraid to remove the last item from the box. I knew what is was going to be, and I was happy somewhere. So why was I still afraid?

I gently reached into the box, taking out another framed certificate. I swallowed down a lump as I saw the text. 'Hamato Mikey.' And on the top. 'formerly known as Mikey Buford.' I could see it wasn't an official certificate, my signature was missing, and it was obviously a printed version. Though Splinter's name and signature was on it, as well as Angel's, and even the signature of the guys.

"A-… a-are you serious?" I whisper, looking up to Splinter, who nodded his head.

"The choice is up to you, all of us would happily welcome you to the family" He said, standing up and walking up to me, but stopping half-way. "You will not have to decide just yet Mikey. Think it through." He added, but I hardly listened to him. Instead I walked up to him, wrapping my arms around him, him returning the gesture.

I buried my face in his clothes, not caring if tears were now streaming down my face, staining his clothes. Sensei didn't mind, instead he just pulled me closer to him. I don't know how much time has passed but eventually Splinter chuckled and patted my head, prying me off of him. He smiled down at me, me returning the smile with watery eyes.

"I suppose that is a _yes?_" He chuckled again, causing me to beam through the tears. He pulled me in a hug again. "Calm down.. my son" He smiled, the words rolling off his tongue like it was the most natural thing to say. It sounded so.. normal, like it was supposed to be this way.

"Don't cry bonehead, we're havin' a family moment" Raph snorts, but it wasn't hard to detect the hint of laughter in his voice.

"The papers aren't official yet, but it'd take a while, and you obviously have to agree.." Donnie said. I pulled out of the hug again, looking at Don. "There is one more thing however… when dad adopted me, my family name obviously changed, but he also made the decision to change my name, from Ichirou to Donatello, to start over." I nodded, already knowing where this was going.

"I was a baby back then, but you've been living with your name for 16 years now, but we still wanted to give you the opportunity to change it. You know, start over again." Another name.. I never even thought of that. Of course, I never even considered that Splinter wanted to adopt me.. and I would be able to get rid of the name 'Buford', but changing my first name? I liked Mikey..

So why was the option so tempting?

"You don't have to decide just yet hon, there's plenty of time to decide whether you want to change your name or not" Angel softly said. I shook my head slightly.

"I want to" I said, equally soft. "I… I just.. I like Mikey" I said, not really sure how to express myself. Leo seemed to notice my struggle.

"You want to start over, but you still want to be called Mikey?" Leo asked, more as a way to clarify what I wanted to say. I nodded bluntly. "How about Michel? Like we have with our names, Raphael, Raph, Donatello, Donnie" He told me, causing me to frown again, I actually liked the idea. The guys had other names.. and only their dad called them by the rightful name.

Donnie whispered something from his spot next to Leo, muttering something to himself.

"What'd ya say Don?" Raph asks, getting up a bit, a curious expression his face. Donnie's face twisted, silently mouthing something. As if he was testing the combination. As if he was testing how it sounded without giving away too much just yet.

"Michelangelo. I was thinking about Michelangelo. Mikey, Michelangelo.. and he's also from the renaissance, like Leonardo, Raphael and Donatello" He clarified, causing me to frown slightly. Michelangelo…. The name silently rolled off my tongue, complicated yet fitting. Like I was actually a part of the family… Michelangelo..

"You guys" I whisper, immediately tearing up a bit again.

"I thought I told ya not to cry" Raph smirked, putting an arm around my shoulders. I laughed through the tears, the smile continuously growing as Leo, Don and even Angel joined the hug.

"I love you guys"

TMNT

We ended up taking all the stacked boxes that were in the guest room, and take them to the basement. The room was actually quite dusty and we had to clean it before we could move the furniture back into the room, after re-painting the walls, getting rid of the dirty white in the room. Instead it was replaced by broken white.

It took the authorities a little while before everything was accepted but eventually Mikey was allowed to move into our home, _permanently_. And after a day of working, it was officially Mikey's room. He had few belongings that he took from his foster home, but then again, he didn't even have a lot of stuff at his foster home, or his former house.

Raph still drove Mikey to Renet for his therapy, two times a week. But Sensei picked him up one time, the other time Charly did. She had managed to switch studies during Christmas, and instead she took her study in New York. She was an adult right now, and with the heritage from her father's side she rented a small apartment here in New York.

Needlessly to say they grew very close, both knowing how the other felt. Because no matter how hard we tried, we could never know.

2 months after the trial Mikey, after Raph had urged him to, confessed about his drug use, and explained it to us. His mom was forced to take the drugs from Carl, so she would become addicted to them and wouldn't turn against Carl, in fear of not getting the drugs anymore. That's how Mikey came in touch with drugs, he saw the effect it had on his mom, how relaxed she was for a couple of hours. He just wanted to feeling, feeling released for once in his life.

But no matter how much he wanted that feeling, he couldn't be even more dependent on his father.

Ketamine, that was the drug he was on. Apparently he did a lot of research, which actually freaked me out more, seeing how much research he had done, how desperate he was. He picked the least addictive drug that could give him a moment, one little moment in his life to relax, to forget about all the pain he was feeling.

And on top of his 2 session of therapy a week we also sent him, on Mikey's request, to a weekly meeting group with people who were addicted as well. It was something getting used to, for Mikey just as much as to us. The sessions took a lot out of him mentally but we could see they worked for, there were small changes. He was starting to open up more, and enjoy his life a bit more.

But it was a change for him, suddenly having a family who cared for him, and for the first few weeks he actually pushed us away like he had done the time he was with us before, when we didn't even know his secret. He was very quiet a lot of times, or doing things on his own because that's the way he grew up. He was used to doing everything alone, and care for the ones around him, or hurt them.

We're still working on it, hoping that we'd help Mikey just like we'd helped Donnie. But it's hard.

And yet, we had a big change as well. It was something getting used to, having Mikey around us 24/7 again. Of course we had those 3 weeks, but that had already been 6 months ago. And back then he had hid everything from us, not wanting us to find out his secret. Right now, he didn't have to. And that was hard, seeing the real Mikey.

Not the happy kid who hid everything from us like those first 3 weeks, not the kid who had told us his secrets but wasn't with us all the time, giving him the opportunity to hide his break-downs from us. No, we saw the real Mikey. The real screams during a nightmare, the haunted eyes, and the tears that held too many memories.

But those challenges didn't matter, all that mattered now was that he was finally safe, family, son of our father, our little brother.

Hamato Michelangelo.

**TMNT**

**And with this chapter.. this story is officially complete. **

**I just want to thank everyone who read/favorited/reviewed this story. Thank you all so much! **


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